[User] This one na like mini practice – a preamble to

[Assistant] So this is like a test of what you’ve been doing since year one. E make sense naw! the thing don finish.  how many MB?  How many MB be the video? Send it through Xenda.  omo fast o fast o; the thing go soon off.  The laptop is already down.


[User] This USB get wahala

[Assistant] E dey shake


[User] A no know for’am!

[Assistant] I don’t think there’s enough space. = How far? = you didn’t come to class; why?=


[User] Did you go?

[Assistant] I was in class naw =


[User] How was it?

[Assistant] Normal, na Anonymous no dey…


[User] Okay na Anonymous

[Assistant] Anonymous naw


[User] When im talk say im go give us test?

[Assistant] E no talk when e go give us


[User] How many people dey for class?

[Assistant] We were few; we were not much in class


[User] People no go come

[Assistant] People had already, because they taught the class was not going to hold. We didn’t really speak in class; we were just attentive and the likes.


[User] Atten wetin?

[Assistant] Guy use xender naw fast fast xender no go tey


[User] The guy wey carry first for una race e dey pain me o. A dey first dat guy on a norms

[Assistant] The battery is pretty low though


[User] Not pretty low, very low

[Assistant] You go leave space. why your body dey do like this?


[User] You are very stupid

[Assistant] I don’t know why they are doing that lately. I think it’s the administration of instagram


[User] Is it your laptop?

[Assistant] You like it?


[User] Bro, please I need past questions: Biography and Grammatology, just those two courses.

[Assistant] Guy mo go chow naw. No, a no dey follow you; I dey go house.


[User] Unfortunately, laptop don off!

[Assistant] For where, send am to phone!


[User] I think this girl’s laptop is still on, Anonymous; that guy dey help am type coach

[Assistant] Ahn, when I was using my own laptop I had two batteries; one was not really good.


[User] Na presentation. They dey try do presentation

[Assistant] Im dey try do no be sey e dey do am


[User] Na presentation. So their plan na to submit am to their supervisors. You know sey na year three we do our own too naw. So each people will present, will come outside to present; they will record it. Is the stuff done?

[Assistant] Yes, e don do.  I’m trying to send it to the USB. You carry your USB for hand


[User] You know sey my phone the usb dey different

[Assistant] Education na TP dey go do


[User] Explain wetin una dey do guy

[Assistant] Tp, tp, teaching practice


[User] This one na like mini practice – a preamble to

[Assistant] So this is like a test of what you’ve been doing since year one. E make sense naw! the thing don finish.  how many MB?  How many MB be the video? Send it through Xenda.  omo fast o fast o; the thing go soon off.  The laptop is already down.


[User] This USB get wahala

[Assistant] E dey shake


[User] A no know for’am!

[Assistant] I don’t think there’s enough space. = How far? = you didn’t come to class; why?=


[User] Did you go?

[Assistant] I was in class naw =


[User] How was it?

[Assistant] Normal, na Anonymous no dey…


[User] Okay na Anonymous

[Assistant] Anonymous naw


[User] When im talk say im go give us test?

[Assistant] E no talk when e go give us


[User] How many people dey for class?

[Assistant] We were few; we were not much in class


[User] People no go come

[Assistant] People had already, because they taught the class was not going to hold. We didn’t really speak in class; we were just attentive and the likes.


[User] Atten wetin?

[Assistant] Guy use xender naw fast fast xender no go tey


[User] The guy wey carry first for una race e dey pain me o. A dey first dat guy on a norms

[Assistant] The battery is pretty low though


[User] Not pretty low, very low

[Assistant] You go leave space. why your body dey do like this?


[User] You are very stupid

[Assistant] I don’t know why they are doing that lately. I think it’s the administration of instagram


[User] Is it your laptop?

[Assistant] You like it?


[User] Bro, please I need past questions: Biography and Grammatology, just those two courses.

[Assistant] Guy mo go chow naw. No, a no dey follow you; I dey go house.


[User] Unfortunately, laptop don off!

[Assistant] For where, send am to phone!


[User] I think this girl’s laptop is still on, Anonymous; that guy dey help am type coach

[Assistant] Ahn, when I was using my own laptop I had two batteries; one was not really good.


[User] ... after joining you can come out a day

[Assistant] I don’t know you, you can come back on that same day. But you can…


[User] You can come out. You will join the last person nah

[Assistant] Ehhh, you will be the last person


[User] You’ll join the last person

[Assistant] Because they said they will remove…


[User] But they might not…

[Assistant] Because they said they will remove the person. That means he has to look for the link again


[User] He has to look for the person that is the next

[Assistant] And come back…


[User] When did they even start this loom thing?

[Assistant] Is just this week…Early this week …


[User] is good; the earlier, the better

[Assistant] From next week like this…… I did not do it o


[User] It wasn’t my money

[Assistant] I was already scared for myself that eh!


[User] I could not do that MMM but then that ultimate cycler just like ah

[Assistant] I know people that, I know people that lost… Anonymous lost like, say 50k …


[User] They said that…

[Assistant] Do you know the thing with people eh,


[User] It's greed

[Assistant] People are greedy


[User] It's greed

[Assistant] Anonymous  was; shebi Anonymous was saying this morning that somebody collected, that 50k use to collect 400…


[User] High class ni

[Assistant] People like us  naw, we are still looking for it.


[User] Okay. You know what will happen, no, do on that last group 1k. If before the end by Monday or Tuesday,

[Assistant] …you cannot cash out tomorrow


[User] 24 hours  ni

[Assistant] this morning, cash out …


[User] 1,000 is the… sacrifice, the sacrificial lamb. The sacrificial…

[Assistant] is a test, is a test


[User] The sacrificial 1,000

[Assistant] Is your 1,000 we want to use to start, your own 1,000 is a test. We will loom. We are looming together. Ahnahn, see this thing, is not about …


[User] See this thing,… it's not about standing...It's not as if it's being run by anybody now. They don't have an ...I've not heard of anythng...

[Assistant] She removed everybody on the group page …But that person… That person is wicked! Ahhn! Ahhn!!Brother cash out … everybody.  Shebi … and leave the rest to pay the money. That thing is endless; it’s an endless cycle. Is not as if they have a site, that’s another thing


[User] My friend said, my friend said hmmmm, loom to Canada; something like that. I said which one is this one again? Loom to Visa, loom visa to Canada.

[Assistant] What’s the time?


[User] 8:34

[Assistant] Is the bread fresh?


[User] you no wan stay for Canada loom, you will be moving fine, dare me, dare me

[Assistant] On our group page yesterday, ... used …500 naira to collect eh 4,000, did you see? One person now say is 250 I have.


[User] Yes, yes, I saw it

[Assistant] People now ask, is the one okay? She said that’s what I have, you people cannot kill me


[User] 500 to collect 4k  make sense naw

[Assistant] At first, 2k …


[User] Stupid!

[Assistant] But seriously, they are looming… before Sunday, I will do it.


[User] You will do 4,000 naira own and it will collect…

[Assistant] Ehhheh! Say wetin happen?


[User] Maybe collect… 4,000 naira, they said is 32,000

[Assistant] Wait ooo…Ahhhhn! You can still do 3,000 own collecting 24...


[User] All the best, all the best!

[Assistant] … I cannot be wasting my money. 1,000 naira, let me be on the safe side


[User] That’s it o

[Assistant] 1,000 naira is okay ahh!


[User] I had, I have one program tomorrow, is on business o. it’s like a summit, Try it! Do you... she has not tried

[Assistant] Is it not harvest house Christian centre


[User] Ehhhennn!

[Assistant] I’ve been hearing…


[User] Are you not going?

[Assistant] Will she have money to go?  shebi is the 1,000 I have she use and do loom


[User] No, I have someone that is coming to pick me when we’re going

[Assistant] Ehhhen, what time,


[User] 2pm?

[Assistant] Ehh! I want to go  nah. shebi I kept it on my status too


[User] No time… latter you come and hug me…

[Assistant] For this heat time wey I dey now?


[User] I can jump now

[Assistant] Easy


[User] Wetin you get for Caro, wetin you come carry come?

[Assistant] I just dey try dey let dem no say I drink coke today nah. I no, I no dey play again<CS>


[User] Who dey waka with you?

[Assistant] Noooo, no, no, no


[User] Hello!

[Assistant] Good afternoon


[User] Thank you

[Assistant] The girl go soon carry phone now she go soon ask you say where you dey…


[User] You passed through this place, you did not cross once ehhh, they dugs ehhh... ehhh… somewhere and you crossed the place?

[Assistant] Where?


[User] This place you came from

[Assistant] Cross what?


[User] You didn’t cross one big ehh… like eh… as if maybe is a gutter, big gutter?

[Assistant] Yes, they…


[User] They… they put a plank that you should cross with

[Assistant] Yes, I, I crossed there


[User] Okay you put it…

[Assistant] Actually, I went round it this way… Yeah, I think I saw it there but I didn’t cross it


[User] Okay

[Assistant] Rather because I when I got, immediately I was getting there, they were putting one iron thing


[User] Iron thing, okay

[Assistant] Yes, yes. So, I had to follow some students


[User] Yes

[Assistant] And went round the building


[User] Okay, but the keke took you through, through this place nah

[Assistant] No


[User] Eh?

[Assistant] Keke, no, keke didn’t come in here. Keke went through one… road, is a street kind of street where people live


[User] When, where did you enter, where did you tell the keke man you are going to?

[Assistant] No, I was with some, I was with a student


[User] Ehhhen…

[Assistant] I don’t know where she said, she told the keke man… One… One hostel, one female hostel


[User] Girls hostel, opkuromo?

[Assistant] Yes, I think. But I passed the hostel, not really a hostel; block of flats


[User] Okay

[Assistant] This…


[User] Yeah

[Assistant] One, one blocks


[User] Yeah

[Assistant] Of flats


[User] Because if you entered from the…

[Assistant] No, I didn’t get to this side at all


[User] But that’s what I’m saying, I was confused when you said you passed through keke you are still asking about the main entrance

[Assistant] No, no, no


[User] See, if you enter errrr, see, this is errr, errr…

[Assistant] No, no, I didn’t, is that the gate?


[User] Yeah, temporary

[Assistant] No, I did not go through that way


[User] Okay, you passed through the gate?

[Assistant] It’s like I passed the gate


[User] Through to, you now went through out

[Assistant] Yes


[User] Through, through this way

[Assistant] Yes


[User] Okay, if you have…

[Assistant] And stopped at one…


[User] Yes

[Assistant] Just stopped somewhere


[User] Yes

[Assistant] At a junction, then we walked…


[User] Through inside

[Assistant] Ehen yes, to the female, one:emale hostel


[User] Yes. See, if you are coming now, maybe if you are coming from Port Harcourt,

[Assistant] Okayyy


[User] Ehhhen or if you are coming from say maybe Benin or all this side ehen?

[Assistant] Okay


[User] You will pass through the errrrr, errrrrrr, what do you call it errrm, the main express road

[Assistant] Okay


[User] There, where you will enter the keke now, You will see a, our sign board there, before the keke, there is a sign, when they are errr, building this errr tanker stuff

[Assistant] Yes, I think I…


[User] Our sign board is there

[Assistant] I think i saw it


[User] Okay that sign board ehn, this errr, this road now will have match down to that sign board

[Assistant] Okay


[User] That express. That they are building this tanker

[Assistant] Okay


[User] That is, that is where the main entrance will be

[Assistant] Okay


[User] The main gate. Then from here to there now, inside those eh plantation now, inside those eh, this eh big big eh tree you are seeing there, there is a river, You understand, so it's not an easy thing, there is gonna be bridge

[Assistant] Okay, will I see those things if I walk down there


[User] You may see it, so assuming you pass through this place now. This is the health scien…ehn health centre

[Assistant] Okay


[User] University health centre

[Assistant] Okay


[User] This the admin block. So, when you leave the admin block this is the library,

[Assistant] : Okay


[User] This is are different department, marine and, this is the err errr student affair unit

[Assistant] Okay


[User] You understand, so you can walk, very free to walk around it

[Assistant] Uh uh oh, thank you so much


[User] It was nothing

[Assistant] Yeah, it's a pleasure


[User] It’s nothing

[Assistant] Thank you


[User] Take care ma

[Assistant] Thank you bye


[User] No time… latter you come and hug me…

[Assistant] For this heat time wey I dey now?


[User] I can jump now

[Assistant] Easy


[User] Wetin you get for Caro, wetin you come carry come?

[Assistant] I just dey try dey let dem no say I drink coke today nah. I no, I no dey play again<CS>


[User] Who dey waka with you?

[Assistant] Noooo, no, no, no


[User] Hello!

[Assistant] Good afternoon


[User] Thank you

[Assistant] The girl go soon carry phone now she go soon ask you say where you dey…


[User] You passed through this place, you did not cross once ehhh, they dugs ehhh... ehhh… somewhere and you crossed the place?

[Assistant] Where?


[User] This place you came from

[Assistant] Cross what?


[User] You didn’t cross one big ehh… like eh… as if maybe is a gutter, big gutter?

[Assistant] Yes, they…


[User] They… they put a plank that you should cross with

[Assistant] Yes, I, I crossed there


[User] Okay you put it…

[Assistant] Actually, I went round it this way… Yeah, I think I saw it there but I didn’t cross it


[User] Okay

[Assistant] Rather because I when I got, immediately I was getting there, they were putting one iron thing


[User] Iron thing, okay

[Assistant] Yes, yes. So, I had to follow some students


[User] Yes

[Assistant] And went round the building


[User] Okay, but the keke took you through, through this place nah

[Assistant] No


[User] Eh?

[Assistant] Keke, no, keke didn’t come in here. Keke went through one… road, is a street kind of street where people live


[User] When, where did you enter, where did you tell the keke man you are going to?

[Assistant] No, I was with some, I was with a student


[User] Ehhhen…

[Assistant] I don’t know where she said, she told the keke man… One… One hostel, one female hostel


[User] Girls hostel, opkuromo?

[Assistant] Yes, I think. But I passed the hostel, not really a hostel; block of flats


[User] Okay

[Assistant] This…


[User] Yeah

[Assistant] One, one blocks


[User] Yeah

[Assistant] Of flats


[User] Because if you entered from the…

[Assistant] No, I didn’t get to this side at all


[User] But that’s what I’m saying, I was confused when you said you passed through keke you are still asking about the main entrance

[Assistant] No, no, no


[User] See, if you enter errrr, see, this is errr, errr…

[Assistant] No, no, I didn’t, is that the gate?


[User] Yeah, temporary

[Assistant] No, I did not go through that way


[User] Okay, you passed through the gate?

[Assistant] It’s like I passed the gate


[User] Through to, you now went through out

[Assistant] Yes


[User] Through, through this way

[Assistant] Yes


[User] Okay, if you have…

[Assistant] And stopped at one…


[User] Yes

[Assistant] Just stopped somewhere


[User] Yes

[Assistant] At a junction, then we walked…


[User] Through inside

[Assistant] Ehen yes, to the female, one:emale hostel


[User] Yes. See, if you are coming now, maybe if you are coming from Port Harcourt,

[Assistant] Okayyy


[User] Ehhhen or if you are coming from say maybe Benin or all this side ehen?

[Assistant] Okay


[User] You will pass through the errrrr, errrrrrr, what do you call it errrm, the main express road

[Assistant] Okay


[User] There, where you will enter the keke now, You will see a, our sign board there, before the keke, there is a sign, when they are errr, building this errr tanker stuff

[Assistant] Yes, I think I…


[User] Our sign board is there

[Assistant] I think i saw it


[User] Okay that sign board ehn, this errr, this road now will have match down to that sign board

[Assistant] Okay


[User] That express. That they are building this tanker

[Assistant] Okay


[User] That is, that is where the main entrance will be

[Assistant] Okay


[User] The main gate. Then from here to there now, inside those eh plantation now, inside those eh, this eh big big eh tree you are seeing there, there is a river, You understand, so it's not an easy thing, there is gonna be bridge

[Assistant] Okay, will I see those things if I walk down there


[User] You may see it, so assuming you pass through this place now. This is the health scien…ehn health centre

[Assistant] Okay


[User] University health centre

[Assistant] Okay


[User] This the admin block. So, when you leave the admin block this is the library,

[Assistant] : Okay


[User] This is are different department, marine and, this is the err errr student affair unit

[Assistant] Okay


[User] You understand, so you can walk, very free to walk around it

[Assistant] Uh uh oh, thank you so much


[User] It was nothing

[Assistant] Yeah, it's a pleasure


[User] It’s nothing

[Assistant] Thank you


[User] Take care ma

[Assistant] Thank you bye


[User] No time… latter you come and hug me…

[Assistant] For this heat time wey I dey now?


[User] I can jump now

[Assistant] Easy


[User] Wetin you get for Caro, wetin you come carry come?

[Assistant] I just dey try dey let dem no say I drink coke today nah. I no, I no dey play again<CS>


[User] Who dey waka with you?

[Assistant] Noooo, no, no, no


[User] Hello!

[Assistant] Good afternoon


[User] Thank you

[Assistant] The girl go soon carry phone now she go soon ask you say where you dey…


[User] You passed through this place, you did not cross once ehhh, they dugs ehhh... ehhh… somewhere and you crossed the place?

[Assistant] Where?


[User] This place you came from

[Assistant] Cross what?


[User] You didn’t cross one big ehh… like eh… as if maybe is a gutter, big gutter?

[Assistant] Yes, they…


[User] They… they put a plank that you should cross with

[Assistant] Yes, I, I crossed there


[User] Okay you put it…

[Assistant] Actually, I went round it this way… Yeah, I think I saw it there but I didn’t cross it


[User] Okay

[Assistant] Rather because I when I got, immediately I was getting there, they were putting one iron thing


[User] Iron thing, okay

[Assistant] Yes, yes. So, I had to follow some students


[User] Yes

[Assistant] And went round the building


[User] Okay, but the keke took you through, through this place nah

[Assistant] No


[User] Eh?

[Assistant] Keke, no, keke didn’t come in here. Keke went through one… road, is a street kind of street where people live


[User] When, where did you enter, where did you tell the keke man you are going to?

[Assistant] No, I was with some, I was with a student


[User] Ehhhen…

[Assistant] I don’t know where she said, she told the keke man… One… One hostel, one female hostel


[User] Girls hostel, opkuromo?

[Assistant] Yes, I think. But I passed the hostel, not really a hostel; block of flats


[User] Okay

[Assistant] This…


[User] Yeah

[Assistant] One, one blocks


[User] Yeah

[Assistant] Of flats


[User] Because if you entered from the…

[Assistant] No, I didn’t get to this side at all


[User] But that’s what I’m saying, I was confused when you said you passed through keke you are still asking about the main entrance

[Assistant] No, no, no


[User] See, if you enter errrr, see, this is errr, errr…

[Assistant] No, no, I didn’t, is that the gate?


[User] Yeah, temporary

[Assistant] No, I did not go through that way


[User] Okay, you passed through the gate?

[Assistant] It’s like I passed the gate


[User] Through to, you now went through out

[Assistant] Yes


[User] Through, through this way

[Assistant] Yes


[User] Okay, if you have…

[Assistant] And stopped at one…


[User] Yes

[Assistant] Just stopped somewhere


[User] Yes

[Assistant] At a junction, then we walked…


[User] Through inside

[Assistant] Ehen yes, to the female, one:emale hostel


[User] Yes. See, if you are coming now, maybe if you are coming from Port Harcourt,

[Assistant] Okayyy


[User] Ehhhen or if you are coming from say maybe Benin or all this side ehen?

[Assistant] Okay


[User] You will pass through the errrrr, errrrrrr, what do you call it errrm, the main express road

[Assistant] Okay


[User] There, where you will enter the keke now, You will see a, our sign board there, before the keke, there is a sign, when they are errr, building this errr tanker stuff

[Assistant] Yes, I think I…


[User] Our sign board is there

[Assistant] I think i saw it


[User] Okay that sign board ehn, this errr, this road now will have match down to that sign board

[Assistant] Okay


[User] That express. That they are building this tanker

[Assistant] Okay


[User] That is, that is where the main entrance will be

[Assistant] Okay


[User] The main gate. Then from here to there now, inside those eh plantation now, inside those eh, this eh big big eh tree you are seeing there, there is a river, You understand, so it's not an easy thing, there is gonna be bridge

[Assistant] Okay, will I see those things if I walk down there


[User] You may see it, so assuming you pass through this place now. This is the health scien…ehn health centre

[Assistant] Okay


[User] University health centre

[Assistant] Okay


[User] This the admin block. So, when you leave the admin block this is the library,

[Assistant] : Okay


[User] This is are different department, marine and, this is the err errr student affair unit

[Assistant] Okay


[User] You understand, so you can walk, very free to walk around it

[Assistant] Uh uh oh, thank you so much


[User] It was nothing

[Assistant] Yeah, it's a pleasure


[User] It’s nothing

[Assistant] Thank you


[User] Take care ma

[Assistant] Thank you bye


[User] No time… latter you come and hug me…

[Assistant] For this heat time wey I dey now?


[User] I can jump now

[Assistant] Easy


[User] Wetin you get for Caro, wetin you come carry come?

[Assistant] I just dey try dey let dem no say I drink coke today nah. I no, I no dey play again<CS>


[User] Who dey waka with you?

[Assistant] Noooo, no, no, no


[User] Hello!

[Assistant] Good afternoon


[User] Thank you

[Assistant] The girl go soon carry phone now she go soon ask you say where you dey…


[User] You passed through this place, you did not cross once ehhh, they dugs ehhh... ehhh… somewhere and you crossed the place?

[Assistant] Where?


[User] This place you came from

[Assistant] Cross what?


[User] You didn’t cross one big ehh… like eh… as if maybe is a gutter, big gutter?

[Assistant] Yes, they…


[User] They… they put a plank that you should cross with

[Assistant] Yes, I, I crossed there


[User] Okay you put it…

[Assistant] Actually, I went round it this way… Yeah, I think I saw it there but I didn’t cross it


[User] Okay

[Assistant] Rather because I when I got, immediately I was getting there, they were putting one iron thing


[User] Iron thing, okay

[Assistant] Yes, yes. So, I had to follow some students


[User] Yes

[Assistant] And went round the building


[User] Okay, but the keke took you through, through this place nah

[Assistant] No


[User] Eh?

[Assistant] Keke, no, keke didn’t come in here. Keke went through one… road, is a street kind of street where people live


[User] When, where did you enter, where did you tell the keke man you are going to?

[Assistant] No, I was with some, I was with a student


[User] Ehhhen…

[Assistant] I don’t know where she said, she told the keke man… One… One hostel, one female hostel


[User] Girls hostel, opkuromo?

[Assistant] Yes, I think. But I passed the hostel, not really a hostel; block of flats


[User] Okay

[Assistant] This…


[User] Yeah

[Assistant] One, one blocks


[User] Yeah

[Assistant] Of flats


[User] Because if you entered from the…

[Assistant] No, I didn’t get to this side at all


[User] But that’s what I’m saying, I was confused when you said you passed through keke you are still asking about the main entrance

[Assistant] No, no, no


[User] See, if you enter errrr, see, this is errr, errr…

[Assistant] No, no, I didn’t, is that the gate?


[User] Yeah, temporary

[Assistant] No, I did not go through that way


[User] Okay, you passed through the gate?

[Assistant] It’s like I passed the gate


[User] Through to, you now went through out

[Assistant] Yes


[User] Through, through this way

[Assistant] Yes


[User] Okay, if you have…

[Assistant] And stopped at one…


[User] Yes

[Assistant] Just stopped somewhere


[User] Yes

[Assistant] At a junction, then we walked…


[User] Through inside

[Assistant] Ehen yes, to the female, one:emale hostel


[User] Yes. See, if you are coming now, maybe if you are coming from Port Harcourt,

[Assistant] Okayyy


[User] Ehhhen or if you are coming from say maybe Benin or all this side ehen?

[Assistant] Okay


[User] You will pass through the errrrr, errrrrrr, what do you call it errrm, the main express road

[Assistant] Okay


[User] There, where you will enter the keke now, You will see a, our sign board there, before the keke, there is a sign, when they are errr, building this errr tanker stuff

[Assistant] Yes, I think I…


[User] Our sign board is there

[Assistant] I think i saw it


[User] Okay that sign board ehn, this errr, this road now will have match down to that sign board

[Assistant] Okay


[User] That express. That they are building this tanker

[Assistant] Okay


[User] That is, that is where the main entrance will be

[Assistant] Okay


[User] The main gate. Then from here to there now, inside those eh plantation now, inside those eh, this eh big big eh tree you are seeing there, there is a river, You understand, so it's not an easy thing, there is gonna be bridge

[Assistant] Okay, will I see those things if I walk down there


[User] You may see it, so assuming you pass through this place now. This is the health scien…ehn health centre

[Assistant] Okay


[User] University health centre

[Assistant] Okay


[User] This the admin block. So, when you leave the admin block this is the library,

[Assistant] : Okay


[User] This is are different department, marine and, this is the err errr student affair unit

[Assistant] Okay


[User] You understand, so you can walk, very free to walk around it

[Assistant] Uh uh oh, thank you so much


[User] It was nothing

[Assistant] Yeah, it's a pleasure


[User] It’s nothing

[Assistant] Thank you


[User] Take care ma

[Assistant] Thank you bye


[User] All these things you are seeing…

[Assistant] Wetin im try… abeg let me hear word


[User] No nah, you…

[Assistant] Even that elm…


[User] You were, you were not in Uniport, you did, you did not come to Uniport earlier before if not eh, you will know that Uniport eh, Uniport don fiiine… Ah! mtchew, when my sister…

[Assistant] Did you do any studies before now?


[User] Eh?

[Assistant] Did you do any studies here before now?


[User] No, I, my sisters they finished, my two elder sisters finished through Uniport too

[Assistant] No, she has a sister here in Uniport too


[User] So, you were always here

[Assistant] Ehhen


[User] Okay

[Assistant] So, then that time eh, especially that sciences. My sister when she read Nursing, she said that they didn’t have department


[User] They didn’t have department

[Assistant] Hmm-hmmmm… na...


[User] When she read what, Nursing?

[Assistant] Yes


[User] Hmm, they do Nursing here?

[Assistant] Yes


[User] First degree?

[Assistant] Yes nau


[User] We all, we offer almost all the courses in this place

[Assistant] But the time, but the year she came, that time, Nurses, I, I, erm, Nursing I don’t think they have errm giving them accreditation something like that, so that’s why she spent almost 8 years…


[User] Wooow!

[Assistant] Jesus!


[User] 8-9 years reading Nursing

[Assistant] Ehhhh!


[User] Jesuuuuus!

[Assistant] That was it


[User] 8-9 years…

[Assistant] She said that these people that are doing basic, this basic unit here because she did basic before she entered here. All of us we did program before we entered here. So, she said you people have basic unit (chuckled). Say before, say that they will tell them they have one class up, then they will now run, now they have another class downstairs, they will now run to MPA1()


[User] It was even more stressful for them then

[Assistant] Yes nau


[User] As if they are year one students or what

[Assistant] She said anytime she just enters Uniport she will just be, she will just be shaking her head. She said that things were not as before. All those 2007  sef when she came…


[User] Ehhen, the world is evolving, they need to evolve along with the world

[Assistant] So, so, even you sef, you no dey at least… try too, im don try


[User] Nothing wey im do, the only thing wey Lan errrm…

[Assistant] Im don tryyyy


[User] im no try anything abeg

[Assistant] How i wish say you met, say you see half pie that time, you go talk say Lanre try


[User] The former VC was actually the one that built almost everything here. The man just came…

[Assistant] The former what?


[User] And started painting and…

[Assistant] The former what?


[User] VC

[Assistant] The former VC…


[User] Yeah, he was the one that, all these construction you are seeing

[Assistant] Okay, except so…


[User] Lanre is just like giving it a finishing touch; I don’t know if you understand. Oh God! If no be that certificate thing na 300 level person suppose dey now

[Assistant] I dey tell you


[User] By next year you will be singing your final…

[Assistant] Final year like this mtchew


[User] Your final exams song mtchew

[Assistant] Well, my mummy say delay no be denial


[User] It’s not my dear

[Assistant] So…


[User] As in eh, if I dey tell people say I don tire for school,

[Assistant] I’m even happy I even pass through that problem…


[User] They will not understand

[Assistant] Because it made me not to play too much in year one…


[User] Hmmm, my sister!

[Assistant] Because you know some…


[User] I know so many person did not gain admission…

[Assistant] Yes nah


[User] Up till now, they are still looking for admission

[Assistant] Yes nau but there was one that changed…


[User] After paying 75k, buying the textbooks and every other thing

[Assistant] I dey tell you. After buying the textbook, some they will now pay house rent and everything


[User] Some eh, most of them paid house rent  nah

[Assistant] Yes nah


[User] Most paid house rent

[Assistant] That three hundred and something thousand that parents…


[User] Me I was coming from my aunty’s house then

[Assistant] That three hundred and something thousand  abi almost three hundred and fifty…


[User] I don’t understand, how person go do…

[Assistant] That some parents spent on their head


[User] How person go do certificate… Write jamb and still wait

[Assistant] I think they ought to wait…


[User] They will not get admission

[Assistant] No there was one then, there was one of my friend, she was, she really, she read… she, no, that girl, she read


[User] So, what was the problem?

[Assistant] She didn’t get up to 180 in jamb, she got 176, she read, the girl tried…


[User] As in, I, I don’t think she read…

[Assistant] Ah, the thing pain me sha


[User] I don’t think she read, see you don’t understand ooo

[Assistant] Nooo, see…


[User] You are in school like…

[Assistant] No, let me tell you…


[User] You are doing…

[Assistant] You know that time we wrote jamb  nah, you know jamb cancelled peoples result


[User] Okay…

[Assistant] Whether she got two hundred and, two hundred and seven the first time


[User] Okay, she had to write the second time

[Assistant] Again…


[User] Okay… okay…

[Assistant] It was the second time she now wrote again that she now failed jamb. Ah, this girl, cry, cry…


[User] Why won’t she cry?

[Assistant] This girl her two eyeball…


[User] No if, If you were the one, why won’t you cry?

[Assistant] No, I was not even praying that even  sef I got 196, I was not even praying that


[User] Me I score 218

[Assistant] You, you try sef. I was not even praying that, even  sef


[User] I did not try anything…

[Assistant] Even sef…


[User] While I was still in my father’s house when I was not even doing that certificate, I used to score 225, 230, still nothing come out…

[Assistant] You try! Wait nah. I say even sef, when I saw the way people were now writing again because I really wanted to write because anybody…


[User] And they can be…

[Assistant] Anybody I ask…


[User] The area wey I wrote my exam they cancel their result o

[Assistant] Yes nah, even the place I wrote…


[User] They even canceled mine

[Assistant] Even the place I wrote, that, I don’t know the name of the place, but for that place eh…


[User] Anonymous side…

[Assistant] Something like that, they canceled the result


[User] Elelewu abi wetin?

[Assistant] I don’t know the name of the place


[User] That’s where I wrote

[Assistant] Ah, I was now even praying that ah, they are canceling people’s result they should cancel my own so I will rewrite so that my own go dey reach 200, when my friend wrote…


[User] Okay you were praying for them to cancel your own?

[Assistant] Yes so that I will rewrite again. When that my friend wrote, her result came out, hey Jesus…


[User] And you know that were purposely reducing their results knowing fully well that they were the people their results were canceled

[Assistant] This girl, this…


[User] kai!

[Assistant] I was there when she checked the result that day  nah


[User] Eh yah!

[Assistant] But she used her phone to check and that scratch card she now just…


[User] Assuming they gave her 180, there’s no way, there’s no way…

[Assistant] No, she would have the gotten admission


[User] The certificate will not give her admission

[Assistant] She would have got…


[User] There’s no way

[Assistant] Yes, Linguistics nah. Ah, the thing pain me for her, this girl cry, her, her two eyeball no gree sleep


[User] _ Assuming she failed the first one they canceled and then this eh…

[Assistant] Eh


[User] Second one, she failed again or…

[Assistant] I saw somebody that failed the first one failed the second one too


[User] She say na curse. The boy whether it was one fifty something or second time again one seventy something, the boy was now like my friend is my friend, the boy was now like hay, e just remain 6 scores, Is 174; it remains 6 scores

[Assistant] The one wey dey break heart pass, the first jamb I wrote I scored 179, they gave me 179 and the cut off mark was 180; that was the first jamb I wrote after I wrote my WAEC. I was like why are people so, I was (chuckled) questioning the person that marked my script. I was like why are people so wicked, why don’t you just give me that 1, give me that 1 score let me go. 179, what are you doing with that 1… mtchew


[User] So… the thing, the truth is that eh, all this things is just luck and is mtchew…

[Assistant] Or maybe you write exam you score…


[User] The thing weak and she even

[Assistant] What do you…


[User] What was her score?

[Assistant] What is this graduate program you people


[User] Okay, it’s…

[Assistant] Not really graduate program


[User] Certi, sorry, Certificate program

[Assistant] Pre-certificate is for Art students erm,


[User] While…Basic is for sciences

[Assistant] Like it’s a program you offer, they, if you, if


[User] But if you fail jamb, Even if you pay that school

[Assistant] And then you score one million in that errm,


[User] It was just that jamb

[Assistant] They just have to work hard to…


[User] IS it just errrm, an exam, an entrance or did,

[Assistant] Of course, we did


[User] Studies first?

[Assistant] We studied first


[User] Yes, you will be going to class like a normal student…

[Assistant] For about six months


[User] Ehhen…

[Assistant] Yes, six months


[User] For about six months

[Assistant] Is it before you gained admission here or is it when you know that you use here as your first choice?


[User] Eh, yes; since you are doing the program here, you have to use here as your first choice

[Assistant] Of course you have to make the university your first choice nah


[User] Okay…

[Assistant] If possible sef…


[User] Okay, you will start doing the program before Jamb comes out

[Assistant] Ehhen, January, from January


[User] Knowing fully well that you are going to apply the school as your first choice

[Assistant] Okay, so it’s something like pre, this pre thing…


[User] Pre-Degree

[Assistant] Yes, yes


[User] Pre-science…

[Assistant] Pre-science, this pre-learn…


[User] Okay

[Assistant] Pre whatever


[User] Okay, okay.

[Assistant] : Ah, the thing, that my friend eh, mtchew


[User] Ehyah, I feel for her o

[Assistant] The thing, no, the thing, the thing eh, ah, the thing, it the thing touch me too


[User] I feel for her

[Assistant] Okay, what about this guy that died, Desmond


[User] Ehen, yes, Anonymou

[Assistant] You know Desmond  nah


[User] Yes, I know himnah, that one, that time, that year one that that were…

[Assistant] I cried o, I cried for that boy; even though I’ve not, I didn’t get to speak with him for one day


[User] No the thing is, no the truth is that, that Desmond is a stubborn person

[Assistant] I don’t know him, I just see him around when we come to have classes


[User] No, he is a no, he is a stubborn person

[Assistant] The reason why I’m actual, I’m actually crying is…


[User] Do you, do you even know what killed him in the first place?

[Assistant] He was, they said he was skating  nah


[User] He was?

[Assistant] He was skating, is it not skating that they are calling it?


[User] Ehhen if, then trailer now jam him. They said that the mother has been warning him about that stuff for a very long time

[Assistant] Mtchew, my sister… my sister… my sister forget


[User] So no that guy…

[Assistant] There’s always this bad attitude that we have


[User] No, when you see him eh, you will know that this guy… im na stubborn person that time nah, im no dey hear word

[Assistant] No, there are other so, stubborn people out there that are still living. The reason why I was actually crying was because mehn… after all this stress; you know before you decide to come and do this certificate, I don’t know about you ooo, I know I’ve written jamb 3 times. Okay…


[User] Okay…

[Assistant] The first one I didn’t do well, the second and the third one I did very well but they didn’t give me admission. mtchew I just got tired of everything and I didn’t want to go to Polytechnic, you understand, someone now told me about this one. Before you make up your mind to do Pre-lim or, I don’t know if you understand, you probably must have written…


[User] _ Twice or so

[Assistant] 2 or 3 whatever, you almost don’t want to give up, that was why you just came here,  you understand. And then after everything he got admission. They said he, that week that was the week he paid his school fees


[User] Yes, yes

[Assistant] That was, ah God!


[User] Even when we were coming from this thing, this errrm, management, this manage…

[Assistant] Their school fees is hundred and fourteen thousand something


[User] Ehhen, yes Linguistics, Linguistics is the highest, in the whole of humanity, Linguistics is the highest

[Assistant] After their’s is ours, right?


[User] Is yes, it’s ours. So, nooo, I thinks is HDS. I don’t know, I was, when I was checking the notice board, I wonder what is in HDS that their school fees is even…

[Assistant] Nooo, forget o, HDS is one of the…


[User] I don’t understand, as in, there’s nothing good in that course, that there school fees is just high. So, they when they were singing that song for him that time when they were walking around

[Assistant] Yes, yes


[User] E Mourning him, the guy that was singing the song he said that when I think of his school fees, tears runaway my eye

[Assistant] Mtchew, i cry o, I cry that time, seriously


[User] Ah, Jesus. The week he paid school fees that was the week it was

[Assistant] I was like…


[User] How I wish he knew that something like that will happen…

[Assistant] How will he know?


[User] There’s no need wasting the school fees

[Assistant] If he knew, he won’t even be, he won’t even come out that day sef


[User] Abi…

[Assistant] Small boy, the guy just wasted like that. After writing jamb, eh running the certificate program, getting admission and everything, they now took his life.It’s so sorry


[User] One thing is to start, another thing is to still finish

[Assistant] To finish


[User] My dear…

[Assistant] Me and my friends, all of us we will finish well


[User] Amen ooo

[Assistant] We will finish. There will, there will not be any song like ‘No more, no more’ in this department, God forbid!


[User] Even, even that, even that year one eh, people that died in school, they were up to 30

[Assistant] My sister!


[User] People were…

[Assistant] Especially that second semester


[User] People were just dying anyhow, you will just come to school…

[Assistant] There is no day I will come to school and not hear, “No more, no more”


[User] You will just come to school, the thing was now looking like, like national anthem

[Assistant] I don’t understand


[User] You will just come to school, I will just be passing this place, let me say I’m going to buy meat pie

[Assistant] No more, no more


[User] No more, no more, the next day I’m coming to buy pure water, no more, no more, I’m coming to buy soap o

[Assistant] E You are coming to at Ofrima, no more, no more…


[User] I say, what is happening?

[Assistant] You are coming out from here, no more, I was like ah-ahn,


[User] I say what’s happening, I say…

[Assistant] I come dey wonder whether na…


[User] I say wetin dey happen?

[Assistant] Whether na ritual or something


[User] I say wetin dey happen, as in that second semester eh, no, no, no

[Assistant] The death was just too much seriously. At a point I started getting scared for myself


[User] As in…

[Assistant] And the, the people dying mostly then were the year one students and final year students. They were the ones dying then


[User] The more, the more, it was mostly errrm, final year

[Assistant] Final year students ehn. The last people that died I think the boy…


[User] Those ones at P ejor park?

[Assistant] Yes


[User] No, the other one, she’s in year 3

[Assistant] Okay that one and the, but she’s in year 3 but the boy is in, in his finals


[User] Final year. Ehen the girl, whether is Bio Chemistry, her name is Blessing, Bio chemistry, something like that because na…

[Assistant] One fine, one fine girl like that


[User] Very fine. This girl is not that… Very fine girl. My church member…

[Assistant] One fine slim girl like that


[User] My church member said the other girl is her junior colleague because my, my church member, the girl graduated, she convocated eh, this, this thing, so she said she knows the girl that the girl is her junior colleague. Mtchew… so people just, even fowl sef no even die like that

[Assistant] As in eh…


[User] The way those two, the way that boy and that girl die

[Assistant] As in eh


[User] owl sef no even die like that

[Assistant] Young people full of life


[User] Ah, as in, whether their bike, power bike … ah! Chineke!

[Assistant] My own story be person talk say. Okay there was this one Joshua posted on our WhatsApp group chat theeeen


[User] Ehhen

[Assistant] If you, I don’t under, as in… the picture of lifeless body somewhere, they were up to like seven; boys and girls, nobody knew what happened to those people


[User] Okay, I think I saw that one

[Assistant] You saw it, abi?


[User] Yes, I saw it

[Assistant] Nobody knew what happened to those people


[User] E Ehhen yes, nobody knew. Ah God! I deleted the picture, the picture was something…

[Assistant] And Joshua was still talking nonsense sef that they will send you to school, you will go where wheree, you… you


[User] Noooo, no, no

[Assistant] That was what he was saying


[User] No, no, what Joshua was trying to say is like if you look at all those pic, if you look at that picture very well ehen, it will look like they were coming from party

[Assistant] They are not looking like people that are coming from party


[User] To me they were looking like that o

[Assistant] They were not looking like people, they were properly dressed; wearing trousers and a top, nobody knows but the truth is that there are people that…


[User] What about this previous one that just died now, do you know the cause, that girl in Engineering…

[Assistant] Girl?


[User] That one that went to drink sniper

[Assistant] Okay, that one that killed herself mtchew Mechanical Engineering


[User] Just because, just because for a boy my parent now send me to school, just because one boy is doing one nonsense…

[Assistant] I don’t understand…


[User] I will now drink sniper

[Assistant] They said she was, she was depressed they said she was


[User] Hey God!!!

[Assistant] That she was, she was depressed


[User] As in there was what, there was this

[Assistant] Her boy friend


[User] There was this guy ehn in our compound

[Assistant] Her boyfriend, her boyfriend broke her heart or broke up with her


[User] There was this guy in my compound because the people in my compound…

[Assistant] And I’m like what kind of, what do you mean by being depressed, what are, what, what have you, what have you seen that other people has not seen more


[User] Wait nah

[Assistant] … try not…


[User] Some people were not able to pay their school fees

[Assistant] Wait nah, there is this ehhhn, ehhhen guy in my department because mostly Warri people that are in my department because  me I’m from Warri


[User] And they said she was, she is from a rich family

[Assistant] Ehhen  yes and I’m me I’m from Warri. So the guy now said mtchew, na im make me like all this because the guy was now talking to me. Na im make me like Warri girls, he now said, all this kind news we no dey take dey hear am for there and is true. Warri girls, their heart strong. Kill your, even kill yourself for man, it does not make sense.


[User] Even if you want to commit suicide, commit suicide for reasonable… not killing yourself for somebody. That guy that you killed yourself for now, the guy is somewhere in the world having fun

[Assistant] With another person mtchew


[User] And is, I don’t understand whatever…

[Assistant] And this girl eh, and this, when, 3when they,


[User] See eh, whatever the thing is, is not like…

[Assistant] Before I saw the girl’s picture, they were talking about the thing, I was like ah who is this girl, who is this sniper girl like…


[User] … no who is this sniper girl

[Assistant] Yes nah, as in the,


[User] The one at Anonymous, the guy too has her picture; the girl is fine

[Assistant] I didn’t see, I didn’t see the girl’s picture for like after that week o, it was when I now say that picture…


[User] The girl is fine

[Assistant] In the my neighbour’s phone, I say Je…sus!


[User] She’s a very fine young girl o

[Assistant] I say Jesus!


[User] Killing yourself in your year one .I say is this the girl? I did not believe o, I say are you people sure that this, this’s the girl that drank sniper?

[Assistant] Who taught them how to kill themselves  nah


[User] I don’t know, I say

[Assistant] I don’t understand


[User] I say wetin

[Assistant] Maybe she use to watch eh…


[User] See is not like… no matter how horrible the situation is

[Assistant] Do you people want to eat?


[User] Noooo

[Assistant] No, thank you ma


[User] Is not like, thank you ma, is not like taking your own life is going to solve anything because we are not told that when we die we will just rotten and become organic material. You are dying to either go to heaven or hell fire. So when you take your own life and die, where are you going to? Is it not hell?

[Assistant] Hell


[User] As you continue your…

[Assistant] I don’t, I don’t know if that thing use to occur to them


[User] I don’t understand

[Assistant] If that’s the case,


[User] As you continue your eternity walk

[Assistant] If we die in this life eh and turn to organic material


[User] I’m not saying you should be religious…

[Assistant] There is no heaven and hell; many people would have left this life


[User] So many people nah

[Assistant] But they don’t want that thing  nah


[User] Some are just living because taking their own lives is… a bigger sin

[Assistant] But who wants to die  kwanu?


[User] Forget o some people are going through things in this world, some people are really suffering. Mtchew, I don’t know ooo

[Assistant] How did she learn how to take that, take her own life?


[User] As in when I saw the girl, when I saw the girl

[Assistant] I will buy sniper, as in use my own money and buy sniper


[User] When I saw the girl

[Assistant] And then drink it


[User] Shey they said it was even 3 sniper she drank  sef

[Assistant] No, it was one. The person that drank 3 was that guy  nah, the boy at Kasaruwa university, the final year students that killed himself, oh you didn’t hear that one


[User] Okay. That one that drank 3 bottles of sniper because the girlfriend broke up with him nah

[Assistant] Sorry dear


[User] I no just understand

[Assistant] The girlfriend broke up! the girl tell you say she is no longer interested


[User] E Is that the only guy in this life?

[Assistant] And then and then…


[User] So… as in eh… They said she didn’t, the girl didn’t even put her parents into consideration

[Assistant] I don’t understand


[User] She just did

[Assistant] Is not just


[User] She just did what was in her mind

[Assistant] Is not always about you. Is not always about you


[User] She just did what was in her mind

[Assistant] That girl just removed five years in her mother’s age, I swear. That woman… I wonder what will happen to me in this world to the extent of all killing myself. I will not kill myself o, I will wait for that girl to come and kill me. I can’t kill myself


[User] My aunty will say…

[Assistant] You don’t know, if she sees that girl, she will be running


[User] My aunty say the only thing that she feels that can take her life is when she is in labour because…

[Assistant] Labour?


[User] Ehen

[Assistant] Why would she say that?


[User] No, because, there was the, when she gave birth, she has given birth to 3 child now. When she gave birth to her, as in the first time she gave birth, she said she was having a lot of complication

[Assistant] Yeah


[User] She said, she will go into the room mtchew, before you know it, the tummy will just stop. The second, I feel that, that thing, it was an, it was an attack

[Assistant] How many children has she now?


[User] She said she no dey born again

[Assistant] Ehen, let her stop, let her stop giving birth


[User] Ehen, she say she no dey born again. So, the second day again…

[Assistant] She doesn’t have a boy?


[User] Two boys one girl

[Assistant] _Okay nah


[User] Ahh-ahhn, wetin she dey find again? Let her close her legs

[Assistant] Jesus christ! So… she, the second day, she will, her tummy will pain her, she will, she and her husband. Even that period sef, her husband was now not even going to work so that in case anything happen…


[User] Yeees…

[Assistant] They will just, the man will just sharperly take her


[User] Rush her to the hospital

[Assistant] She will go to hospital, nothing will happen. The thing was now frustrating


[User] Kai, kai

[Assistant] Aunty do you know that she carried this pregnancy for 11 months?


[User] 11 months?

[Assistant] 11 months. The


[User] Almost a year!

[Assistant] The day that we now finally found out that the child was going to come out, even when they confirmed that the child will come out that day, that day because they wanted to do CS, the husband refused. He said no they are not going to operate the wife through CS. That was 2014, he said they will not operate the wife. Then he said they won’t try it. He said she will give birth the normal way and they will do thanksgiving, that not through CS that they will give girl, give birth to this child…


[User] Heeeei, 11 months…

[Assistant] Do you know that this woman slept in labour from around 6am early morning till the next, the next day. They, another Doctor even had to come, it was not the same Doctor


[User] I wanted to say she is a strong woman, then I remembered it wasn’t by her power

[Assistant] You see the reason why the thing why she made that statement that something that she know that can really take her life here is labour.


[User] Oh, oh

[Assistant] It was just God’s intervention


[User] Her own, her own pass labour o my sister. She carried pregnancy…

[Assistant] Why did her husband not allow them to operate her?


[User] To… operate her. That one is a very bad one ooo

[Assistant] You don’t think eh, that thing could have killed her


[User] Trading with someone’s life, you will not tell me that one o,  abeg.They should use operation before I die

[Assistant] See some people, operation is not bad. Hmm, instead of risking your life, you operate and bring out the child so that mother and child will be okay


[User] So that your life…

[Assistant] Una get black pen?


[User] Do you have black pen?

[Assistant] No, I don’t


[User] black pen. To… she is using that textbook then

[Assistant] She’s not, I don’t think she used that


[User] She carried this child till the extent that we thought that it was even twin she will even give birth to sef

[Assistant] … said she wants to help those carry overs


[User] You were thinking it was twins?

[Assistant] I mean the girl,the woman, she went through hell


[User] She went through hell

[Assistant] He said I should come and meet him


[User] See the boy now

[Assistant] Mtchew, and those kind of behavior, that they used to be very, very, very at times eh, stubborn…


[User] Just, I still have tutorials, let me go and meet him

[Assistant] Ehhen, I will be in the library


[User] Look for where to charge your phone o

[Assistant] Thank God sha


[User] Where are you charging your own?

[Assistant] She is going to…


[User] That child birth is not easy

[Assistant] And not that he is a witness o


[User] At times I used to…

[Assistant] Go and plug for me?


[User] I used to, I used to think…

[Assistant] Is not that, is not that he is a witness o that will be saying that kind of thing because Jehovah withness they are the only ones that used too…


[User] Wait!

[Assistant] They don’t do this, even for you to give their wife blood…


[User] I should come with you?

[Assistant] Ehen, they don’t give.


[User] That was how one man’s eh… wife died. People, people, people insulted this man. Say you be witch.

[Assistant] Buy blood sef, they will not even buy. Somebody will be dying, you will be telling me I should not, I should not give the person blood


[User] They will tell you that according to our belief, we are not suppose to…

[Assistant] Me I cannot even do any, I cannot have anything to do with someone that attends that church, talk more of…


[User] Ah! Na wetin i wan talk just now

[Assistant] Talk more of having anything closer with marrying someone who goes to that church


[User] You know when you tell them that ah this una church, this una policy so I no go fit… they will say don’t worry, marry me, marry me, when you marry them, you will see,

[Assistant] I will not marry them, they are usually very wicked


[User] You will see hell fire

[Assistant] They are usually very, very wicked


[User] You will see hell fire

[Assistant] Very dogmatic people. What they believe is what they believe. You can never ever make them do eh, be eh, again eh, go against their…


[User] So when you now collect the blood now from them, does that one now make you, at that particular point in time, the person is loosing blood

[Assistant] Trying to save someone’s life


[User] That’s why the person need blood

[Assistant] Trying to save someone’s life


[User] Ordinarily will I now go and collect blood from somebody. If at all my eye turn me , na to drink malt nah. Yes nah, na to drink malt. When you finish running and ...

[Assistant] Religion has really dealt with so many people I swear


[User] Mtchew. I dey tell you

[Assistant] Buy hundred naira thing nah


[User] Or give am Ribena. Na people wey dey buy me market, ...

[Assistant] Sweetheart I’m going


[User] Okay, it was nice talking with you

[Assistant] I no even know where Anonymous dey. Anonymous make Anonymous…


[User] Take care okay, see you… tomorrow

[Assistant] No wahala


[User] Bye

[Assistant] Bye… Ma


[User] Bye dear

[Assistant] Take care of yourself, okay


[User] Thank you

[Assistant] Bye ma


[User] Bye dear

[Assistant] You’re from where?


[User] Enugu State, by marriage

[Assistant] Okay, but where are you from?


[User] Imo State by birth

[Assistant] Okayyyy. Okay, I’m from Anambra State, I heard you speaking igbo language I just pretended I was not hearing what you were saying


[User] Oh, you are from Anambra?

[Assistant] Yes, Okay, bye!


[User] Bye dear!

[Assistant] All this Onitsha people


[User] You nko?

[Assistant] I’m from Delta


[User] Hmm-hmmm, but not Delta Igbo?

[Assistant] No…


[User] Okay

[Assistant] Urobo


[User] Urobo

[Assistant] All this Delta igbo, they are part of Onitsha, Anambra,  abi? only because that part of that Delta igbo is not close to Ukwani, is not close to Asaba, Onitsha. They are part of Anambra people.


[User] Where is Engineering side?

[Assistant] Engineering, here is it. Okayyy, it’s far from here


[User] It’s far from here?

[Assistant] Yes


[User] Not Abuja. Is this place Abuja?

[Assistant] Eh, this’s Abuja. It’s at Delta Complex


[User] Okay, okay. If I want to go to Delta Complex, how do I get there?

[Assistant] Okay ehh, once you get to the park, you will ask for the cab that is going to Delta park


[User] Okayyy

[Assistant] Ehhn. Sorry there’s, sorry that is going to ehh this thing, that is going to Oshodi, then you ask from people where can I find Delta cab, they will direct you


[User] I mean from here

[Assistant] Okay from here? Ehhhn yes. When you get to the park, You will take a cab that is going to Osho… okay yes, to make it simple just tell him back of Kim


[User] Back of?

[Assistant] Kim. They will be saying it, Joba, Delta, back of Kim, Joba… enter the one of back of Kim, then they will now stop you in that Engineering department …


[User] Okay

[Assistant] Those Engineering, that’s where they use to learn


[User] Okay

[Assistant] Civil Engineering… Electronic…


[User] What of places like Pharmacy? Places like Pharmacy department, that side?

[Assistant] Pharmacy. Pharmacy department is inside this campus


[User] Hmmm… which side?

[Assistant] Very far, you will just work down one of this road here


[User] Okay

[Assistant] Down straight


[User] This side?

[Assistant] Ehhen. This side


[User] Okay

[Assistant] It’s a fine department o, Phamarcy


[User] So… as in eh… They said she didn’t, the girl didn’t even put her parents into consideration

[Assistant] I don’t understand


[User] She just did

[Assistant] Is not just


[User] She just did what was in her mind

[Assistant] Is not always about you. Is not always about you


[User] She just did what was in her mind

[Assistant] That girl just removed five years in her mother’s age, I swear. That woman… I wonder what will happen to me in this world to the extent of all killing myself. I will not kill myself o, I will wait for that girl to come and kill me. I can’t kill myself


[User] My aunty will say…

[Assistant] You don’t know, if she sees that girl, she will be running


[User] My aunty say the only thing that she feels that can take her life is when she is in labour because…

[Assistant] Labour?


[User] Ehen

[Assistant] Why would she say that?


[User] No, because, there was the, when she gave birth, she has given birth to 3 child now. When she gave birth to her, as in the first time she gave birth, she said she was having a lot of complication

[Assistant] Yeah


[User] She said, she will go into the room mtchew, before you know it, the tummy will just stop. The second, I feel that, that thing, it was an, it was an attack

[Assistant] How many children has she now?


[User] She said she no dey born again

[Assistant] Ehen, let her stop, let her stop giving birth


[User] Ehen, she say she no dey born again. So, the second day again…

[Assistant] She doesn’t have a boy?


[User] Two boys one girl

[Assistant] _Okay nah


[User] Ahh-ahhn, wetin she dey find again? Let her close her legs

[Assistant] Jesus christ! So… she, the second day, she will, her tummy will pain her, she will, she and her husband. Even that period sef, her husband was now not even going to work so that in case anything happen…


[User] Yeees…

[Assistant] They will just, the man will just sharperly take her


[User] Rush her to the hospital

[Assistant] She will go to hospital, nothing will happen. The thing was now frustrating


[User] Kai, kai

[Assistant] Aunty do you know that she carried this pregnancy for 11 months?


[User] 11 months?

[Assistant] 11 months. The


[User] Almost a year!

[Assistant] The day that we now finally found out that the child was going to come out, even when they confirmed that the child will come out that day, that day because they wanted to do CS, the husband refused. He said no they are not going to operate the wife through CS. That was 2014, he said they will not operate the wife. Then he said they won’t try it. He said she will give birth the normal way and they will do thanksgiving, that not through CS that they will give girl, give birth to this child…


[User] Heeeei, 11 months…

[Assistant] Do you know that this woman slept in labour from around 6am early morning till the next, the next day. They, another Doctor even had to come, it was not the same Doctor


[User] I wanted to say she is a strong woman, then I remembered it wasn’t by her power

[Assistant] You see the reason why the thing why she made that statement that something that she know that can really take her life here is labour.


[User] Oh, oh

[Assistant] It was just God’s intervention


[User] Her own, her own pass labour o my sister. She carried pregnancy…

[Assistant] Why did her husband not allow them to operate her?


[User] To… operate her. That one is a very bad one ooo

[Assistant] You don’t think eh, that thing could have killed her


[User] Trading with someone’s life, you will not tell me that one o,  abeg.They should use operation before I die

[Assistant] See some people, operation is not bad. Hmm, instead of risking your life, you operate and bring out the child so that mother and child will be okay


[User] So that your life…

[Assistant] Una get black pen?


[User] Do you have black pen?

[Assistant] No, I don’t


[User] black pen. To… she is using that textbook then

[Assistant] She’s not, I don’t think she used that


[User] She carried this child till the extent that we thought that it was even twin she will even give birth to sef

[Assistant] … said she wants to help those carry overs


[User] You were thinking it was twins?

[Assistant] I mean the girl,the woman, she went through hell


[User] She went through hell

[Assistant] He said I should come and meet him


[User] See the boy now

[Assistant] Mtchew, and those kind of behavior, that they used to be very, very, very at times eh, stubborn…


[User] Just, I still have tutorials, let me go and meet him

[Assistant] Ehhen, I will be in the library


[User] Look for where to charge your phone o

[Assistant] Thank God sha


[User] Where are you charging your own?

[Assistant] She is going to…


[User] That child birth is not easy

[Assistant] And not that he is a witness o


[User] At times I used to…

[Assistant] Go and plug for me?


[User] I used to, I used to think…

[Assistant] Is not that, is not that he is a witness o that will be saying that kind of thing because Jehovah withness they are the only ones that used too…


[User] Wait!

[Assistant] They don’t do this, even for you to give their wife blood…


[User] I should come with you?

[Assistant] Ehen, they don’t give.


[User] That was how one man’s eh… wife died. People, people, people insulted this man. Say you be witch.

[Assistant] Buy blood sef, they will not even buy. Somebody will be dying, you will be telling me I should not, I should not give the person blood


[User] They will tell you that according to our belief, we are not suppose to…

[Assistant] Me I cannot even do any, I cannot have anything to do with someone that attends that church, talk more of…


[User] Ah! Na wetin i wan talk just now

[Assistant] Talk more of having anything closer with marrying someone who goes to that church


[User] You know when you tell them that ah this una church, this una policy so I no go fit… they will say don’t worry, marry me, marry me, when you marry them, you will see,

[Assistant] I will not marry them, they are usually very wicked


[User] You will see hell fire

[Assistant] They are usually very, very wicked


[User] You will see hell fire

[Assistant] Very dogmatic people. What they believe is what they believe. You can never ever make them do eh, be eh, again eh, go against their…


[User] So when you now collect the blood now from them, does that one now make you, at that particular point in time, the person is loosing blood

[Assistant] Trying to save someone’s life


[User] That’s why the person need blood

[Assistant] Trying to save someone’s life


[User] Ordinarily will I now go and collect blood from somebody. If at all my eye turn me , na to drink malt nah. Yes nah, na to drink malt. When you finish running and ...

[Assistant] Religion has really dealt with so many people I swear


[User] Mtchew. I dey tell you

[Assistant] Buy hundred naira thing nah


[User] Or give am Ribena. Na people wey dey buy me market, ...

[Assistant] Sweetheart I’m going


[User] Okay, it was nice talking with you

[Assistant] I no even know where Anonymous dey. Anonymous make Anonymous…


[User] Take care okay, see you… tomorrow

[Assistant] No wahala


[User] Bye

[Assistant] Bye… Ma


[User] Bye dear

[Assistant] Take care of yourself, okay


[User] Thank you

[Assistant] Bye ma


[User] Bye dear

[Assistant] You’re from where?


[User] Enugu State, by marriage

[Assistant] Okay, but where are you from?


[User] Imo State by birth

[Assistant] Okayyyy. Okay, I’m from Anambra State, I heard you speaking igbo language I just pretended I was not hearing what you were saying


[User] Oh, you are from Anambra?

[Assistant] Yes, Okay, bye!


[User] Bye dear!

[Assistant] All this Onitsha people


[User] You nko?

[Assistant] I’m from Delta


[User] Hmm-hmmm, but not Delta Igbo?

[Assistant] No…


[User] Okay

[Assistant] Urobo


[User] Urobo

[Assistant] All this Delta igbo, they are part of Onitsha, Anambra,  abi? only because that part of that Delta igbo is not close to Ukwani, is not close to Asaba, Onitsha. They are part of Anambra people.


[User] Where is Engineering side?

[Assistant] Engineering, here is it. Okayyy, it’s far from here


[User] It’s far from here?

[Assistant] Yes


[User] Not Abuja. Is this place Abuja?

[Assistant] Eh, this’s Abuja. It’s at Delta Complex


[User] Okay, okay. If I want to go to Delta Complex, how do I get there?

[Assistant] Okay ehh, once you get to the park, you will ask for the cab that is going to Delta park


[User] Okayyy

[Assistant] Ehhn. Sorry there’s, sorry that is going to ehh this thing, that is going to Oshodi, then you ask from people where can I find Delta cab, they will direct you


[User] I mean from here

[Assistant] Okay from here? Ehhhn yes. When you get to the park, You will take a cab that is going to Osho… okay yes, to make it simple just tell him back of Kim


[User] Back of?

[Assistant] Kim. They will be saying it, Joba, Delta, back of Kim, Joba… enter the one of back of Kim, then they will now stop you in that Engineering department …


[User] Okay

[Assistant] Those Engineering, that’s where they use to learn


[User] Okay

[Assistant] Civil Engineering… Electronic…


[User] What of places like Pharmacy? Places like Pharmacy department, that side?

[Assistant] Pharmacy. Pharmacy department is inside this campus


[User] Hmmm… which side?

[Assistant] Very far, you will just work down one of this road here


[User] Okay

[Assistant] Down straight


[User] This side?

[Assistant] Ehhen. This side


[User] Okay

[Assistant] It’s a fine department o, Phamarcy


[User] As in, that experience eh, I no go even want my enemy to go through that kind of thing

[Assistant] It’s not something you will forget in a hurry


[User] I no even want my enemy to go through that kind experience because it was a very bad experience

[Assistant] They were busy packing pepper pouring at each other. I was, I was just, I was, I was, I had to shift o


[User] That dry pepper, na that dry pepper o

[Assistant] That dried grinded one


[User] The pepper dey high

[Assistant] I had to shift o very far while watching them


[User] When the thing enter one person eye, to fight again go hard those people

[Assistant] People are crazy, as in women, some women actually, not all women. In the market, of all the things in the world to fight with, they did not see… is only dry pepper


[User] They did not see, they did not see wood to stone

[Assistant] They no see water sef to fight with, na pepper mtchew


[User] No nau, water no go hold, na e… this wood go strong. As the woman dey bring her pepper dey come,  me I will just give the woman chance. I will say  oya madam has it gotten to this extent?

[Assistant] Sorry, it has not gotten to this level mtchew. Are you photocopying this thing? I want to go home, I’m very hungry


[User] I will, I will…

[Assistant] Be fast…


[User] I love your nicker, I love all this native nicker eh,

[Assistant] Or the trouser, I love it too


[User] And Favour

[Assistant] I want too ooo, when are you coming?


[User] Eh, let him do for two  nah, it’s 70 naira

[Assistant] Abeg, come o, come do am


[User] Please, be fast okay…

[Assistant] Okay


[User] E Remaining this popular course. This one is complete but the girl, I’m not seeing her handwriting

[Assistant] ...baby, Anonymous, do for two nau, I will give you the money


[User] Abeg come, come do that thing, I don’t have strength…

[Assistant] Are you not coming here? I don’t understand…


[User] I don’t have strength

[Assistant] Ah, Ah nau, Anonymous just do it okay…


[User] I don’t have strength

[Assistant] Just do two nau, if you come out…


[User] Which one is you don’t have strength, what is strength there? You’re going there to photocopy; do it for two.  Hia! If she follows you there, is she going to give you strength? Ehhhen, Mr.Anonymous

[Assistant] Don’t tell him to photocopy 20, he will bring one


[User] He said he doesn’t have strength; that you should come there, he doesn’t have strength

[Assistant] Na waao, can you photocopy that thing?


[User] Ehhen nau

[Assistant] People just… are you doing it?


[User] I’m going to photocopy one

[Assistant] Anonymous do,oya use that fifty naira and do it. If you come I will give you twenty naira. Thank you baby… unless I will come to your lodge and come and collect it,  yeye boy. Anonymous come!


[User] come back, abeg..i  no fit

[Assistant] o boy, I no understand.. I just come this school


[User] see as my face  come small

[Assistant] this light is very nice.


[User] I like am pass the yellow one. That yellow one  dey cause heat

[Assistant] let me beat one guy  wey don reach 30 years die last semester. I for beat  am die


[User] which guy be that one last semester? I no know  naw..

[Assistant] you know pastor?


[User] which of them be pastor? We no too come that una side last this thing  naw

[Assistant] wait o.. we no carry that paper back where that slippers dem dey?


[User] which  other slippers?

[Assistant] Polo  wear my own o


[User] How I take wear your own. Wetin dey worry you?

[Assistant] one other type of that slippers still dey here.


[User] the thing just dey reign anyhow sef

[Assistant] I don find that slippers tire for warri I  no see.


[User] He no  dey?

[Assistant] he dey, but he no dey common


[User] which one be he go  don cold?

[Assistant] she no know wetin she dey come do before?


[User] she no know say  na stan

[Assistant] .. I no.. the way you take dey reason girls.. I no even understand..I  wan understand..


[User] if she come you go put hand.. no be say you dey go field walk.. he go long any how.. na the dead men.

[Assistant] so hen.. she go just dey there, you no understand?... I no go lie for una.. the way me and my guy dey see am. My guy na Geology.. I know you don t like razz men; that s why... see eh.. no dey forget.. when it comes to voodoos.. all this taaredmen.. dey sabi  dey give person anyhow money o..


[User] shey na this guy you dey look for?

[Assistant] you sure say that thing go fit in like that? I no sure say that thing go  fit like that.


[User] guy, he no go fit.. you one die? He no go fit. He go wash die

[Assistant] I go put this thing naw..


[User] wrapper?  Except so.

[Assistant] oh.. you  think say


[User] if you follow am put wrapper, hear go still  dey do you.

[Assistant] ewo.. this bag don spoil.


[User] wait wait. Wait.. you never see anything. Why you no put your bag  for this place

[Assistant] shift am go back.. shift am go back. Wait.  Where your own bag?


[User] ok..na only this one you carry?

[Assistant] dem thief my bag.. everything o


[User] shio..wetin  be this?

[Assistant] how far, where you  dey?


[User] o boy, exam don dey come o.. hostel go full o.. when exam dey come..na that time people go come  dey get sense.

[Assistant] Mama I didn’t know you are around, I would have come to disturb you since. I thought you were in afternoon duty


[User] So you are going to, you are one of the two?

[Assistant] Ehennnn…


[User] So, how did the meetings go?

[Assistant] Meeting that it was all about… what happened till the end of going and coming


[User] Okay, I will come and disturb you, let me come first

[Assistant] Okay dear, but don’t wear this yeye cloth o


[User] Eh, mama it's fine nah

[Assistant] For you it's fine.


[User] Mama, you know say I no dey wear…

[Assistant] No time… latter you come and hug me…


[User] For this heat time wey I dey now?

[Assistant] I can jump now


[User] Easy

[Assistant] Wetin you get for Caro, wetin you come carry come?


[User] I just dey try dey let dem no say I drink coke today nah. I no, I no dey play again<CS>

[Assistant] Who dey waka with you?


[User] Noooo, no, no, no

[Assistant] Hello!


[User] Good afternoon

[Assistant] Thank you


[User] The girl go soon carry phone now she go soon ask you say where you dey…

[Assistant] You passed through this place, you did not cross once ehhh, they dugs ehhh... ehhh… somewhere and you crossed the place?


[User] Where?

[Assistant] This place you came from


[User] Cross what?

[Assistant] You didn’t cross one big ehh… like eh… as if maybe is a gutter, big gutter?


[User] Yes, they…

[Assistant] They… they put a plank that you should cross with


[User] Yes, I, I crossed there

[Assistant] Okay you put it…


[User] Actually, I went round it this way… Yeah, I think I saw it there but I didn’t cross it

[Assistant] Okay


[User] Rather because I when I got, immediately I was getting there, they were putting one iron thing

[Assistant] Iron thing, okay


[User] Yes, yes. So, I had to follow some students

[Assistant] Yes


[User] And went round the building

[Assistant] Okay, but the keke took you through, through this place nah


[User] No

[Assistant] Eh?


[User] Keke, no, keke didn’t come in here. Keke went through one… road, is a street kind of street where people live

[Assistant] When, where did you enter, where did you tell the keke man you are going to?


[User] No, I was with some, I was with a student

[Assistant] Ehhhen…


[User] I don’t know where she said, she told the keke man… One… One hostel, one female hostel

[Assistant] Girls hostel, opkuromo?


[User] Yes, I think. But I passed the hostel, not really a hostel; block of flats

[Assistant] Okay


[User] This…

[Assistant] Yeah


[User] One, one blocks

[Assistant] Yeah


[User] Of flats

[Assistant] Because if you entered from the…


[User] No, I didn’t get to this side at all

[Assistant] But that’s what I’m saying, I was confused when you said you passed through keke you are still asking about the main entrance


[User] No, no, no

[Assistant] See, if you enter errrr, see, this is errr, errr…


[User] No, no, I didn’t, is that the gate?

[Assistant] Yeah, temporary


[User] No, I did not go through that way

[Assistant] Okay, you passed through the gate?


[User] It’s like I passed the gate

[Assistant] Through to, you now went through out


[User] Yes

[Assistant] Through, through this way


[User] Yes

[Assistant] Okay, if you have…


[User] And stopped at one…

[Assistant] Yes


[User] Just stopped somewhere

[Assistant] Yes


[User] At a junction, then we walked…

[Assistant] Through inside


[User] Ehen yes, to the female, one:emale hostel

[Assistant] Yes. See, if you are coming now, maybe if you are coming from Port Harcourt,


[User] Okayyy

[Assistant] Ehhhen or if you are coming from say maybe Benin or all this side ehen?


[User] Okay

[Assistant] You will pass through the errrrr, errrrrrr, what do you call it errrm, the main express road


[User] Okay

[Assistant] There, where you will enter the keke now, You will see a, our sign board there, before the keke, there is a sign, when they are errr, building this errr tanker stuff


[User] Yes, I think I…

[Assistant] Our sign board is there


[User] I think i saw it

[Assistant] Okay that sign board ehn, this errr, this road now will have match down to that sign board


[User] Okay

[Assistant] That express. That they are building this tanker


[User] Okay

[Assistant] That is, that is where the main entrance will be


[User] Okay

[Assistant] The main gate. Then from here to there now, inside those eh plantation now, inside those eh, this eh big big eh tree you are seeing there, there is a river, You understand, so it's not an easy thing, there is gonna be bridge


[User] Okay, will I see those things if I walk down there

[Assistant] You may see it, so assuming you pass through this place now. This is the health scien…ehn health centre


[User] Okay

[Assistant] University health centre


[User] Okay

[Assistant] This the admin block. So, when you leave the admin block this is the library,


[User] : Okay

[Assistant] This is are different department, marine and, this is the err errr student affair unit


[User] Okay

[Assistant] You understand, so you can walk, very free to walk around it


[User] Uh uh oh, thank you so much

[Assistant] It was nothing


[User] Yeah, it's a pleasure

[Assistant] It’s nothing


[User] Thank you

[Assistant] Take care ma


[User] Thank you bye

[Assistant] That redeem girl that use to come to our fellowship then. Ahhhh, okay, you are not that close to him nah


[User] Noooo

[Assistant] Towards the ending you ran, you left us  nah, you were nor…


[User] Is he working now?

[Assistant] Ehen, he’s working in Warri o


[User] That means is in Warri here?

[Assistant] He’s in Warri. That’s why we are in Warri


[User] Ahn. What of eh… Pastor… eh Sam? I hear say he dey do this thing for here PGD

[Assistant] No, he don go this thing nah, he dey for …, Schlumberger now


[User] Hmmm, that im GCE, na GCE e take connect

[Assistant] See life, this life is not about GCE again o


[User] Ehen…   Na… connection

[Assistant] Is not about GCE o, you know how many


[User] As dem just dey get work and dem go dey talk say work no dey, work no dey

[Assistant] That’s why I dey tell you say, do your…


[User] Abeg, mey I just do comot with beta result o

[Assistant] That, do your ... beta result 1 and now that you are married now, you can stay focused shey you know, to, to…


[User] Hey! Hello! Excuse me!

[Assistant] To serve God


[User] Good evening!

[Assistant] E go finish before I comot o. Wait, waity!


[User] Your hand dey block jhor

[Assistant] Ehen, na there the camera dey, ehen… E go play o


[User] ... e concern you?

[Assistant] E no concern you, why you come dey, make she play her play o, I no disturb am


[User] This movie dey funny nah

[Assistant] Very funny o,  You go laugh tire


[User] Na im make me won collect am

[Assistant] You go laugh tire, join, you go join them


[User] Na wao, the thing fit no get sense at the end of the day

[Assistant] The thing try, e try get sense; small o… na comedy


[User] Comedy

[Assistant] Ehen


[User] Abeg mey I dey go, I want, I wan do small work

[Assistant] Na that place the… no forget wetin I tell you make you go do o, where you wan go now?


[User] I’m going home. I want paste abeg

[Assistant] Just paste?


[User] I want paste

[Assistant] No wahala. When you hear from Endurance last?


[User] Endurance, … hmm?

[Assistant] Olori! How are you ma? How is the ministry? See our Yoruba, Yoruba Olori, King’s wife<CS>


[User] Ohhh!

[Assistant] Good evening dear, how are you?


[User] I’m fine

[Assistant] This’s my sister. How far? Bawoni school?


[User] Fine o

[Assistant] You are enjoying  nah


[User] Enjoying what?

[Assistant] See your new scarf,  kai!This one is called one million dollar scarf. As Olori  nah, Olori concerned. How is the King? And the Chiefs in the council?


[User] They are fine

[Assistant] Tell the King I’m around o


[User] So…

[Assistant] Mey im come do im normal duty. So you have finished your paper When are you travelling?


[User] Next week

[Assistant] … . You want to go and see man woman nah. Ma, you don, you don fat nah, you no even lean sef


[User] Ehhh?

[Assistant] You no lean jhor. I’m not seeing konga


[User] But you are seeing a borehole

[Assistant] show me the borehole let me see


[User] See am nah, you no dey see?

[Assistant] Which one?


[User] Ah! see my face sef, pimples everywhere…

[Assistant] It’s normal  nah


[User] Thank God for foundation and powder

[Assistant] Foundation and?


[User] Powder

[Assistant] What about the first layer? second layer no dey?


[User] Na so

[Assistant] I know say una get foundation, layer 1, layer 2…


[User] Yes ooo…

[Assistant] Ehhen. Na only foundation you dey use? But you are still okay like that o. King still love you that way


[User] Hmm, nawaooo

[Assistant] Nawaooo


[User] Oya dey go mey I dey see you. Hmm? Wetin?

[Assistant] ... my hair nah


[User] Dey go

[Assistant] Thank God say you no say I fit go, na you go come dey find me


[User] Hey!

[Assistant] You go just bring my phone


[User] When you come carry cane come flog me for midnight.

[Assistant] No be phone be this one? E no dey work? I’ve not opened it o, I know you have exhibit inside, I’m not opening it .


[User] She is… na you she go eat

[Assistant] Ehen, she no go eat. So… both of una dey go service same time, abi?


[User] Noooo, third

[Assistant] Who dey come Ogun State?


[User] I no understand

[Assistant] Who dey come Ogun State?


[User] We won enter HND3 again?

[Assistant] Who dey go Port Harcourt? Who dey go P, who dey go Port Harcourt?


[User] God forbid

[Assistant] Who dey come Ogun State?


[User] Me I don’t have…

[Assistant] What’s happening?


[User] t’s out. I will be going soon.

[Assistant] Okay… result abi?.  Ehen… have you taken any course and your course no get carry over? you go pass me. Hey!!!... Shake me, shake me Olori! Hey!!!


[User] Leave me alone

[Assistant] you be igbo person? See as you dey call my own name, my fine name na im you dey call like igbo person. So, when will I, when will you come back?


[User] After one week

[Assistant] One week? See as you dey look first, I no understand See as you dey look


[User] E/E How?

[Assistant] Just look at her


[User] I’m hungry

[Assistant] You’ve not eaten? Your kingdom, what happened to your kingdom? Yoruba kingdom, what happened to that kingdom?


[User] Na so! Dem dey… demdey raise food for the kingdom?

[Assistant] Ask, I was the Fin.Sec. in my time


[User] So…

[Assistant] That’s our room here, Aso rock, we no dey lack food, we sure


[User] Ehhenn…

[Assistant] Me, President and Vice President; three of us for room. We dey flex


[User] When you do Fin. Sec, who be President?

[Assistant] Na, no be Lateef, that short fair goat


[User] Lateef?

[Assistant] Mtchew, i hate that boy with my life


[User] Hai! That short guy ehen,

[Assistant] Wey dey SLT?


[User] SLT, ehen… Your Pre, your, e no be President that time im dey abi wetin im be that time, na President nah.

[Assistant] He go SLT President


[User] SLT President. Ah, o boy! That guy that time, but he’s a nice person if you are close to him. When I dey room na but later you know say I come get room for … I come leave the room. Na im and this guy come dey get wahala unfortunately that fair… guy weydey PHD; Dele

[Assistant] Ehhhen, no be Dele


[User] Na Dele. Im dey bear Dele too; na Dele be im name

[Assistant] Wetin be that im name sef?


[User] This fair guy

[Assistant] Mtchew, that guy, I know am


[User] E dey PHD. Wey be say, President go bring im wife come from school, e go dey the room, three weeks e go dey this place

[Assistant] Three weeks?


[User] No porter dare come

[Assistant] And he get person wey dey stay with am for there


[User] He go pursue the guy comot, the guy go come dey stay for… this place

[Assistant] Eiyahhhh


[User] It’s annoying sha

[Assistant] The guy go come tell me, only when he won dress, he go come change, he go come carry cloth change; come go, go class. I say thank God, God save am o say I no dey room, if I dey room, e no go, e no go happen. Na so im do when we dey for HND1 too. A whole room wey even get six roommates, Him and im girlfriend dem go dey the room dem go sleep, boys go stay there


[User] Ahh

[Assistant] Yes nah. Na up bunk deme come dey. E get one of our guydem say that guy, the guy dey down


[User] Ahhhahhhn

[Assistant] The guy see me, e just tire


[User] As in…

[Assistant] And when e be say sleep don go far for am; the bed go just dey shake, e go say ah!


[User] Hmmm-hmmm  Na wao, the girl sef na…

[Assistant] No be for moon school, na their father school ahhhn!


[User] Nawao…

[Assistant] No be our in-law be this?


[User] No be him ooo

[Assistant] Ehhhhen?


[User] They actually resemble

[Assistant] Ah, they resemble o,  o boy


[User] This one wey im dey tell me everyday mey I come im office come see am

[Assistant] Come see am for wetin?


[User] I no dey go ooo

[Assistant] After wey im don take one for our church, he wan take another one?


[User] You dey mind am?

[Assistant] Ah!


[User] E go dey do co…

[Assistant] At times, he dey see me dash me money, I dey collect that one but that see…


[User] Wey my own percent?

[Assistant] Mtchew, uh…


[User] As e dey give you money, you no go give me my own percent again?

[Assistant] No be dash e dey dash me… mtchew


[User] P That man eh, im eye no clear ooo

[Assistant] no clear. With the kind fine wife weyim marry


[User] Omo, Joy, Joy, Joy, Joy. The girl for marry our guy jejely nah

[Assistant] She do am saintly nah.


[User] I know say one thing about a girl is, when you no follow your heart, you follow some things because of circumstance around you.  na problem

[Assistant] So far as she’s ripe, no time nah and she looks very matured


[User] She just look like that. she’s young. She’s young. You know say the girl papa get home, get level for this place, Delta State.Her papa get level for Delta State. I happy for am the guy don wait rich nah, he don wait

[Assistant] He don try o


[User] He don try. he try girls for school, dem no work. When he try come evening, E go just stay, pack there, follow girls talk mtchew, later come tell us say guy, o boy this girls dem no… na so won flex. You are healed in Jesus name… ehen so no more game but e try. Na palesup, you go come palesup wedding nah

[Assistant] When?


[User] On the fifth of this month, You must come the wedding o

[Assistant] Hmm-hmmmm. Where dem won do am?


[User] Naaa AG here we won use

[Assistant] Hmmm, I no know about am o


[User] Eh! Dem don send am for group o, CASOR group Alumni this thing

[Assistant] I no dey any group. See ehn, that time wey my phone…


[User] Did you join CASORITE?

[Assistant] Wait! That time wey my phone take spoil…


[User] I say you be CASORLEFT

[Assistant] Wey I come use this one eh, I no dey any group again. So, you fit add me. If you the admin, if you know the admin, tell am make im add me


[User] Okay, I go add you, you hear? So, we dey go, you still dey go. Hotel Excel, na im we won use

[Assistant] On 25th?


[User] 25th, Hotel Excel naim be reception

[Assistant] Hotel Excel…


[User] That one wey we do mama… Joy own, opposite ShopRite

[Assistant] I no dey then o, I no dey that im wedding


[User] You no dey, okay

[Assistant] Okay


[User] Ah! Joy wedding eh… You know say Bazil, Basil no show

[Assistant] Basil


[User] Basil no show nah

[Assistant] Why?


[User] Ah! E break Basil heart nah

[Assistant] Ehhhenn…


[User] Ahhn!

[Assistant] Which of the Joy?


[User] Our in-law wey get sky motor

[Assistant] Okay, I think say na that Basil girlfriend


[User] Nooo, that one different. Basil don dey suffer heartbreak since

[Assistant] As in…


[User] He don dey suffer heartbreak since. O boy that,

[Assistant] But, but the way wey Basil relationship and that girl take dey, e just dey as if immediately dem go marry


[User] That is why…

[Assistant] When I see her this thing on facebook ehhen Jesus!


[User] I can never talk to any girl, any, any girl again in my life

[Assistant] And that boy na pretty high boy wey she marry o


[User] Yes nah, our set o. I can never touch any girl. The girl wey be say e go come from house eh, carry Ghana must go of provision of everything, we go dey my room nah, dem go come carry come give Basil say, you know say Basil no too get cash then,The guy people owe and Basil dey teach am that’s why she dey close that time, So, e get gift Basil dey pull me na so e just carry am… well done, well done

[Assistant] So, the thing was so much that, dem won even won do the wedding before o, something spoil am. The sister won do wedding, dem say mey im sister do first when we dey school that time, dem won rush am do mtchew, dem say make the sister do, after the sister, Basil don go meet the parents sef. Basil don go meet the girl parents, dem don seal everything, hai! The thing pain me. But when I come discover now, why I come dey, wetin dey pain me now be say, you know say Joy dey get crush on Timothy


[User] Timothy?

[Assistant] Uhhn, Timothy nah


[User] Wey be…

[Assistant] Librarian


[User] Which of the Timothy? Librarian

[Assistant] Ehhen, na im nah. Ehhennah. So that time now later, when this guy come dey take dem on tutorial; Basil, dem come dey get close walk, im and God. Give am run, give am run. You know say Basil only go for the church, from church, from AG here, say Basil how far, Basil say make she come mtchew she vex. When we come reach the place, the girl come dey find Basil


[User] Why?

[Assistant] Dey look for Basil


[User] Why im dey find am?

[Assistant] No be im… person where im heart dey be that? Later she come dey send message give this guy, wetin be im name, Timothy


[User] She wan leave her husband for then marry,

[Assistant] Na im she send message give to Timothy say make Timothy come see im pikin nah. Say im know say she love Timothy, ahn, ahn


[User] Ahn, ahn, mama Joy She dey Okay

[Assistant] See, you know say that man,


[User] Or something dey worry am

[Assistant] The age difference between them  nah


[User] E too much

[Assistant] Too much. The age difference too much


[User] When pesin go, go marry im papa mate

[Assistant] But she has a>


[User] Wetin enter inside her?

[Assistant] She has a reason


[User] Is it the money or what?

[Assistant] Family …, she need small thing to lift the family, understand? And … Basil never gain job.  … all of us still been dey find, we still dey school that time


[User] DELSU

[Assistant] No, nobody know say na like this im go turn am to mean. So…


[User] Where Basil dey now sef?

[Assistant] Mtchew. Oboy that guy just go, na Abuja he dey o. He just go hide, he no go mtchew, for im to show


[User] Hello, How far? Good evening. How you dey? How your exams? No wahala. Wey that lefty nah, where una dey? Hello, you don go house? Una no get card, una go dey call; mey una flash, I go call you.

[Assistant] My dear, na so the matter heavy o, the thing pain me eh. When this girl come do her own, Vivian come do her own now I say,  Kai!


[User] When me I see the thing eh, as I wan open the picture, na Basil I dey expect to see

[Assistant] Everybody expect to see Basil near the girl.  When dem just see the girl like this, eh, another guy


[User] Na immediately I just call you say wetin dey happen

[Assistant] Google fit say na PTI boy again and I’m…


[User] Fine boy Hmm mtchew

[Assistant] You sabi, all these girls,


[User] Nawao

[Assistant] All this una, all these girls


[User] E no fit them

[Assistant] Im own better o. Me sef I see na two of you beta. You know my guy, Roma, sorry. Hello! You know Roma nah


[User] Roma…

[Assistant] Roma wey be say na my course mate.  Roma wey  did im ND here, na player im be, when he come back for HND, ah, how far nah? Bawoni? Ekuise


[User] Good evening

[Assistant] So, when Roma con come back for HND, Roma come dey continue im player stuff with the other girls sorry. E come get one girl, Blessing. Blessing na im be Isoko… this thing nah mtchew


[User] Is like I know the girl

[Assistant] Life


[User] Life, he come dey focused. Pesin wey be say Roma carry, Blessing carry Apollo from hostel come give Roma for room. Roma carry am give me, me I carry am go church village that time wey I dey use glass do exam, I carry am go church village. Na so we dey share Apollo. Can you believe that a week to exam, this girl bring her wedding card come give us for room, all of us dey room. We dey N&E27, all of us sit down like this, she carry wedding card come

[Assistant] She get mind o


[User] Roma dey, all of us dey, all of us dey like this sit down. She say this is my card for my wedding, I want you guys to come. When we open the… this thing, na formal PTI student wey dey work for… Chevron

[Assistant] Heeeey! If na me sef, I will marry


[User] Nooo nau

[Assistant] But and the boy was there


[User] He was there. Come join mata,

[Assistant] She get mind


[User] She come talk say ehhhen, all of us have to come for the wedding mtchew. We just collect the card, we keep am. As she just waka go mtchew, oboy, look the guy like this

[Assistant] That boy go cry o


[User] Roma nah wey dey, e no dey date one girl o. any girl wey come, he just dey reason say noo he can’t love again

[Assistant] Hei!


[User] The one wey you see come put you love come say you love, yes you don see true love. No be when I dey Lagos na im I dey work with nah when you come that time. When I dey go beach, dey change, you dey see, e dey send picture for this… so with me guy, guy I can’t love again

[Assistant] Ahhn, if you no fit love again and if you


[User] The guy, the guy dey Warri here now

[Assistant] If you really love, it will take it, it will take time


[User] It will take time. Imagine that kind of thing

[Assistant] Hmmm, it's killing o


[User] Eh!

[Assistant] Hia!


[User] Somebody that was something before. Ewonieleyi? Je n wo… Love letter lo nkani, ta lo n sendi e, which one?

[Assistant] I will not go till it’s Wednesday


[User] Wednesday, what happened, seems their hostel is not open, do you have anything… still there?

[Assistant] Yes o, welfare still dey write exam, to sleep go dey fear am


[User] Ahhn-ahhhnn. So, you are going on,.. next tomorrow,  abi? What are you bringing for me when you come back?

[Assistant] Drinking garri


[User] Me garri, garri Ijebu or which one?

[Assistant] Garri Ijebu


[User] Only garri Ijebu? What you got during your… interview, I never… I never forget o; when you chop alone. This girl bring something come from exam interview, she chop am alone, come talk say make I no tell her mummy, wey my phone sef, mey I even call am now

[Assistant] Since that time, you never still forget


[User] I no go forget o

[Assistant] Since 2017


[User] I can’t forget . You and Alabi are now working hand in hand now. Which kind laugh be that, has he inject you?

[Assistant] Who is the Bella here  sef? where im go?


[User] You no whether dem don pay Bella school fees, Bella no dey im room

[Assistant] Isoku wetin we go eat, I dey hungry?


[User] Wetin you won chop?

[Assistant] Food nah


[User] Food for where, where we go chop??

[Assistant] Dem dey sell food for there


[User] You no cook for room?

[Assistant] Na so. Make person cook this exam time. You no even dey pity person


[User] Exam don finish nah

[Assistant] Exam dey and no time


[User] Even in our time, we use to cook, shey you know, we use to cook

[Assistant] After the paper, I see; I no dey even see anything, na sleep, sleep dey my eyes hmm, mtcheW


[User] And you never chop

[Assistant] I go sleep o, no be…


[User] But you know in our time we use to cook, shey you know?

[Assistant] Because you people are super intelligent


[User] Nooo, na God o, we dey cook

[Assistant] Na so. We, we are just coming up. We are trying to…


[User] Wey you dey on distinction, you tell me say you are coming up

[Assistant] E concern you?


[User] Distinction. You are coming up. Na DT she dey ooo

[Assistant] Na so. I no dey DT ooo


[User] No be upper you dey?

[Assistant] Ehhhen


[User] 3.59

[Assistant] So, chinekemo…


[User] Abi the day of convocation now, they will give you award nah. Best graduate girl, female… SLT

[Assistant] Hmm… I pray say…


[User] I no say

[Assistant] Me I no know o


[User] For that una class ehen, una get people wey get, we get brain o, brain dey

[Assistant] The competition eh


[User] Brain too much.  Uju dey, Oluchi, all of una

[Assistant] As in


[User] Kai!

[Assistant] The thing just dey like we dey in a race


[User] No, no, no, no. Some of una for drop enter this one, ND1, make una come dey do HND1, make e come deyyy, but all of una just come the same time

[Assistant] Nobody won gree for anybody


[User] E too much from this one

[Assistant] Oya nah, 2


[User] What do you say, what do we eat?

[Assistant] Food nah


[User] Where?

[Assistant] Dem dey sell food there