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| ,pretty big
|
| pretty big,
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| ,deal or no deal
|
| deal or no deal,
|
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|
| ,variety? |
| what's "variety?","different thingsnot the same thing all the time."
|
| "different thingsnot the same thing all the time.","you mean, like a pepperoni pizza instead of a cheese pizza?"
|
| "you mean, like a pepperoni pizza instead of a cheese pizza?","no, i mean a salad instead of a pizza."
|
| "we need to save money.","why do we need to save money?"
|
| "why do we need to save money?","because we need to buy a house."
|
| "because we need to buy a house.","but a house is so expensive."
|
| "but a house is so expensive.","that's why we need to save money. |
| that's why we need to save money.","how much do we need to save?"
|
| "how much do we need to save?","we need to save enough for a down payment."
|
| "we need to save enough for a down payment.","how much is that?"
|
| "how much is that?","that's about $30,000. |
| that's about $30,000.","thirty thousand dollars! that will take forever."
|
| "thirty thousand dollars! that will take forever.","not if we save every penny."
|
| "not if we save every penny.","okay. here's seven pennies. |
| the ocean is so big.you can't see the end of it."
|
| "you can't see the end of it.it goes on and on forever. |
| it goes on and on forever.and it's deep, too."
|
| "and it's deep, too.i think it's five miles deep."
|
| "i think it's five miles deep.are there fish at the bottom? |
| are there fish at the bottom?there are fish at the top and the bottom. |
| there are fish at the top and the bottom.are there more fish or more people? |
| are there more fish or more people?i think there are more fish. |
| i think there are more fish.i hope so. i love to eat fish. |
| i'm upset with my mom.","why is that?"
|
| "why is that?","i warned her about her new boyfriend. she didn't listen to me. |
| i warned her about her new boyfriend. she didn't listen to me.","what happened?"
|
| "what happened?","i gave her $1,000 for her birthday. i told her to spend it on herself."
|
| "i gave her $1,000 for her birthday. i told her to spend it on herself.","that was very nice of you."
|
| "that was very nice of you.","i found out that she gave it to her new boyfriend."
|
| "i found out that she gave it to her new boyfriend.","why did she do that?"
|
| "why did she do that?","he said he would buy her a nice ring."
|
| "he said he would buy her a nice ring.","what's wrong with that? |
| what's wrong with that?","he went to las vegas. he lost it all gambling."
|
| "he went to las vegas. he lost it all gambling.","i hope your mom broke up with him."
|
| "do animals talk to each other?","of course they talk to each other."
|
| "of course they talk to each other.","what do they talk about?"
|
| "what do they talk about?","they talk about other animals."
|
| "they talk about other animals.","what else do they talk about?"
|
| "what else do they talk about?","they talk about food and the weather."
|
| "they talk about food and the weather.","do they talk about us?"
|
| "do they talk about us?","of course they talk about us."
|
| "of course they talk about us.","what do they say about us?"
|
| "what do they say about us?","they say that we are funny-looking."
|
| "they say that we are funny-looking.","ha! we're not funny-looking; animals are funny-looking. |
| ha! we're not funny-looking; animals are funny-looking.","we're funny-looking because we wear clothes. |
| i have to clean the house.yes, it's very dirty."
|
| "yes, it's very dirty.you can help me. |
| you can help me.why me? |
| why me?because you helped make it dirty. |
| because you helped make it dirty.what do you want me to do? |
| what do you want me to do?i want you to clean the bathroom. |
| i want you to clean the bathroom.oh, that's easy."
|
| "oh, that's easy.clean the sink, the tub, the counter, and the toilet. |
| clean the sink, the tub, the counter, and the toilet.that's a lot of work."
|
| "that's a lot of work.tell me when you finish. |
| tell me when you finish.i don't think so. you'll just give me more work. |
| you're watching too much tv.","what do you mean?"
|
| "what do you mean?","i mean you're wasting your life. |
| i mean you're wasting your life.","i'm having fun. |
| i'm having fun.","you're sitting there with your mouth open. |
| you're sitting there with your mouth open.","who cares?"
|
| "who cares?","i care. do something."
|
| "i care. do something.","okay. i did something."
|
| "okay. i did something.","what did you do?"
|
| "what did you do?","i turned up the volume."
|
| "i turned up the volume.","that's not what i meant by |
| that's not what i meant by "do something."","will you do something? leave me alone."
|
| "did you write a letter to grandma?","yes, i did."
|
| "yes, i did.","did you tell her about school?"
|
| "did you tell her about school?","i told her that school is fun."
|
| "i told her that school is fun.","did you put the letter in an envelope?"
|
| "did you put the letter in an envelope?","yes, and i sealed the envelope."
|
| "yes, and i sealed the envelope.","did you put a stamp on the envelope?"
|
| "did you put a stamp on the envelope?","i couldn't find any stamps. |
| i couldn't find any stamps.","they're in the kitchen drawer. |
| they're in the kitchen drawer.","okay. i just put a stamp on the envelope."
|
| "okay. i just put a stamp on the envelope.","give me the envelope, and i'll mail it for you. |
| give me the envelope, and i'll mail it for you.","when is grandma going to learn about e-mail?"
|
| "why are you yawning?","i'm sleepy. |
| i'm sleepy.","why don't you go to bed? |
| why don't you go to bed?","i want to watch this tv show."
|
| "i want to watch this tv show.","maybe you should record it."
|
| "maybe you should record it.","the tape recorder is broken."
|
| "the tape recorder is broken.","then you should watch the rerun."
|
| "then you should watch the rerun.","why? i'm watching the original. |
| why? i'm watching the original.","but you'll be asleep in about one minute. |
| but you'll be asleep in about one minute.","i'm just yawning because the commercials are on. |
| i'm just yawning because the commercials are on.","okay. i'll tell you how the show ends. |
| okay. i'll tell you how the show ends.","zzz."
|
| "it's sunday.so? |
| so?you know what that means. |
| you know what that means.i forgot. |
| i forgot.sunday means we go to church. |
| sunday means we go to church.oh, yeah. |
| oh, yeah.put on a coat and tie. |
| put on a coat and tie.why? |
| why?to show respect to god and others. |
| to show respect to god and others.i'm glad sunday is only once a week."
|
| "i'm glad sunday is only once a week.i hope god didn't hear that."
|
| "i hope god didn't hear that.he'll forgive me."
|
| "did you feed the cat?","i'll do that in a minute. |
| i'll do that in a minute.","the cat is meowing. he's hungry. |
| the cat is meowing. he's hungry.","okay. i'll feed him right now. |
| okay. i'll feed him right now.","you shouldn't make him wait. |
| you shouldn't make him wait.","i was doing my homework."
|
| "i was doing my homework.","the cat doesn't care about your homework. |
| the cat doesn't care about your homework.","the cat doesn't care about anything. |
| the cat doesn't care about anything.","that's the way cats are. |
| that's the way cats are.","all they think about is themselves."
|
| "all they think about is themselves.","maybe we should get rid of him."
|
| "maybe we should get rid of him.","of course not! he's family. |
| i hate shaving.me too. |
| me too.i just cut myself again. |
| i just cut myself again.did you use a new blade? |
| did you use a new blade?it doesn't matter. old blades cut, new blades cut."
|
| "it doesn't matter. old blades cut, new blades cut.maybe you should use an electric shaver. |
| maybe you should use an electric shaver.they make a lot of noise, but they don't give a close shave."
|
| "they make a lot of noise, but they don't give a close shave.maybe you should stop shaving. |
| maybe you should stop shaving.and grow a beard? |
| and grow a beard?sure. why not? |
| sure. why not?because food and other stuff sticks in my beard. |
| because food and other stuff sticks in my beard.hmm. here's an idea. put cream on your face and have the cat lick it off."
|
| "excuse me.","yes?"
|
| "yes?","are you reading this paper?"
|
| "are you reading this paper?","oh, no. help yourself."
|
| "oh, no. help yourself.","i asked because the paper is sitting next to you."
|
| "i asked because the paper is sitting next to you.","thank you. that's polite of you to ask. |
| thank you. that's polite of you to ask.","some people would just pick it up."
|
| "some people would just pick it up.","yes, i know. some people are rude."
|
| "yes, i know. some people are rude.","i always try to be polite."
|
| "i always try to be polite.","so do i."
|
| "so do i.","the world needs more polite people like us."
|
| "the world needs more polite people like us.","i agree 100 percent."
|
| "mom, i want a puppy.","let me think about it."
|
| "let me think about it.","why do you have to think about it?"
|
| "why do you have to think about it?","because a puppy costs money."
|
| "because a puppy costs money.","no, it doesn't. puppies are free. |
| no, it doesn't. puppies are free.","yes, but a puppy needs shots."
|
| "yes, but a puppy needs shots.","shots for what?"
|
| "shots for what?","so it won't get sick. just like you get shots. |
| so it won't get sick. just like you get shots.","i hate shots."
|
| "i hate shots.","and a puppy eats food. food costs money."
|
| "and a puppy eats food. food costs money.","no problem. i'll give him food off my plate. |
| no problem. i'll give him food off my plate.","oh, no you don't. puppies don't eat vegetables."
|
| "look at all these kittens!","how many are there?"
|
| "how many are there?","eight."
|
| "eight.","they're all so cute. |
| they're all so cute.","yes, but i can't keep them. |
| yes, but i can't keep them.","what are you going to do with them?"
|
| "what are you going to do with them?","i'm going to give them away. do you want one? |
| i'm going to give them away. do you want one?","yes, i would love one."
|
| "yes, i would love one.","which one do you want?"
|
| "which one do you want?","that one. the one that's all black. |
| that one. the one that's all black.","yes, i like that one, too."
|
| "yes, i like that one, too.","i'll call him blacky. |
| my parents go to church every sunday.they trust in god. |
| they trust in god.they hope they will go to heaven. |
| they hope they will go to heaven.they probably will. |
| they probably will.but no one knows for sure. |
| but no one knows for sure.that's for sure."
|
| "that's for sure.no one knows what happens after we die. |
| no one knows what happens after we die.if we are good, we will be happy in heaven with god. |
| if we are good, we will be happy in heaven with god.that's what many people believe."
|
| "that's what many people believe.if we are bad, we will be unhappy forever in hell. |
| if we are bad, we will be unhappy forever in hell.i don't want to go to hell."
|
| "i don't want to go to hell.let's go to church with your parents on sunday."
|
| "my husband died.","i'm sorry for you. |
| i'm sorry for you.","thank you."
|
| "thank you.","when did he die?"
|
| "when did he die?","a couple of months ago."
|
| "a couple of months ago.","you still miss him."
|
| "you still miss him.","yes, but i talk to him almost every day."
|
| "yes, but i talk to him almost every day.","when you go to church?"
|
| "when you go to church?","no, when i call him on his cell phone."
|
| "no, when i call him on his cell phone.","what do you mean?"
|
| "what do you mean?","i buried him with his cell phone."
|
| "i buried him with his cell phone.","what will you do when the battery dies?"
|
| "today is friday the thirteenth.","that's a bad day. |
| that's a bad day.","it's supposed to be unlucky. |
| it's supposed to be unlucky.","you're supposed to stay home all day. |
| you're supposed to stay home all day.","that's what i do. |
| that's what i do.","my friend stayed in a hotel on friday the thirteenth."
|
| "my friend stayed in a hotel on friday the thirteenth.","that was a mistake."
|
| "that was a mistake.","he stayed on the thirteenth floor."
|
| "he stayed on the thirteenth floor.","what happened?"
|
| "what happened?","someone stole his laptop."
|
| "someone stole his laptop.","he was asking for it."
|
| "he was asking for it.","he learned his lesson. he's home today. |
| do you really love me?of course. |
| of course.prove it. |
| prove it.how can i prove it? |
| how can i prove it?take me to dinner. |
| take me to dinner.that's it? that's all i have to do? |
| that's it? that's all i have to do?take me to a nice restaurant, not to mcdonald's."
|
| "take me to a nice restaurant, not to mcdonald's.but a nice restaurant costs money. |
| but a nice restaurant costs money.yes, and you have to make a reservation. |
| yes, and you have to make a reservation.that's such a hassle."
|
| "that's such a hassle.i knew you didn't love me."
|
| "i knew you didn't love me.okay, okay! i'll make a reservation right now."
|
| "my parents are divorced.","so are mine."
|
| "so are mine.","why did your parents get divorced?"
|
| "why did your parents get divorced?","my father found a new girlfriend."
|
| "my father found a new girlfriend.","that's too bad. |
| that's too bad.","my mother was hurt and angry."
|
| "my mother was hurt and angry.","she had good reason. what did she do?"
|
| "she had good reason. what did she do?","she told him to drop his girlfriend."
|
| "she told him to drop his girlfriend.","what did your father do?"
|
| "what did your father do?","he moved out of our house."
|
| "he moved out of our house.","i guess he really liked his new girlfriend."
|
| "i guess he really liked his new girlfriend.","yes, but she left him a year later."
|
| "my grandma's apartment smells funny.so does mine. |
| so does mine.i think it's an old people's smell. |
| i think it's an old people's smell.really? |
| really?yes. i think when you get old, you begin to smell. |
| yes. i think when you get old, you begin to smell.like fruit that is too ripe? |
| like fruit that is too ripe?yes, just like fruit that is too ripe. |
| yes, just like fruit that is too ripe.but the smell is different. |
| but the smell is different.yes, old people don't smell like fruit."
|
| "yes, old people don't smell like fruit.no, they smell like a thrift shop. |
| no, they smell like a thrift shop.yes, a thrift shop has that same smell. |
| yes, a thrift shop has that same smell.yes, an old smell. |
| the price of stamps goes up and up.i think stamps used to cost a penny. |
| i think stamps used to cost a penny.that was a long time ago. |
| that was a long time ago.it was before i was born. |
| it was before i was born.now a stamp is 42 cents. |
| now a stamp is 42 cents.but in may it will be 44 cents. |
| but in may it will be 44 cents.have you ever lost a letter in the mail? |
| have you ever lost a letter in the mail?no, i haven't."
|
| "no, i haven't.neither have i. |
| neither have i.so, they do a good job for the money. |
| so, they do a good job for the money.yes, they do. |
| yes, they do.maybe we shouldn't complain."
|
| "a button came off my shirt.","what are you going to do?"
|
| "what are you going to do?","first, i have to find the button."
|
| "first, i have to find the button.","where did you lose it?"
|
| "where did you lose it?","i have no idea."
|
| "i have no idea.","a button is hard to find. did you look in your pant cuffs?"
|
| "a button is hard to find. did you look in your pant cuffs?","that's a good idea. |
| that's a good idea.","i found a button in my pant cuffs one time."
|
| "i found a button in my pant cuffs one time.","let me look. no, it's not there. |
| let me look. no, it's not there.","many shirts come with an extra button."
|
| "many shirts come with an extra button.","you're right. this one does have an extra button. |
| you're right. this one does have an extra button.","now all you have to do is sew it on."
|
| "i have to go to the bathroom.","you drink too much coffee."
|
| "you drink too much coffee.","but i love coffee."
|
| "but i love coffee.","well, it's your life. |
| well, it's your life.","you eat too much chocolate."
|
| "you eat too much chocolate.","i don't think so. |
| i don't think so.","have you looked in the mirror?"
|
| "have you looked in the mirror?","do you think i'm getting fat? |
| do you think i'm getting fat?","i didn't say that. |
| i didn't say that.","what did you say?"
|
| "what did you say?","i said i have to go to the bathroom."
|
| "i said i have to go to the bathroom.","that's what i thought you said. |
| did you do the laundry?yes, i did. |
| yes, i did.what did you wash? |
| what did you wash?i washed the sheets and towels. |
| i washed the sheets and towels.what about the pillowcases? |
| what about the pillowcases?yes, i took them off the pillows and washed them. |
| yes, i took them off the pillows and washed them.did you dry everything in the dryer? |
| did you dry everything in the dryer?yes, i dried everything in the dryer. |
| yes, i dried everything in the dryer.then what did you do? |
| then what did you do?i folded all the towels. |
| i folded all the towels.did you put the sheets on the beds? |
| did you put the sheets on the beds?yes, and i put the pillowcases on the pillows. |
| do you listen to the radio?i listen day and night. |
| i listen day and night.what do you listen to? |
| what do you listen to?mostly talk radio. |
| mostly talk radio.what's that?"
|
| "what's that?people talk about current events. |
| people talk about current events.what do they say? |
| what do they say?they say they want change. |
| they say they want change.what kind of change? |
| what kind of change?they want tax cuts. |
| they want tax cuts.why do they want tax cuts? |
| why do they want tax cuts?because tax cuts will save them money. |
| mom, i'm hungry.","look in the fridge."
|
| "look in the fridge.","i'm looking. there's nothing to eat."
|
| "i'm looking. there's nothing to eat.","are you sure?"
|
| "are you sure?","it's almost empty. |
| it's almost empty.","i went to the market yesterday."
|
| "i went to the market yesterday.","i don't see anything. |
| i don't see anything.","i bought lots of oranges and apples."
|
| "i bought lots of oranges and apples.","i don't want fruit. i want something tasty. |
| i don't want fruit. i want something tasty.","eat the fruit. it's good for you. |
| eat the fruit. it's good for you.","next time you go to the market, let me go with you."
|
| "next time you go to the market, let me go with you.","no, thank you. all you want to eat are hot dogs and candy bars."
|
| "what is there to eat?","i don't know. look in the fridge. |
| i don't know. look in the fridge.","i think i'll make a sandwich. |
| i think i'll make a sandwich.","what kind?"
|
| "what kind?","a ham sandwich."
|
| "a ham sandwich.","the bread is in the cabinet."
|
| "the bread is in the cabinet.","where's the mustard? |
| where's the mustard?","it's in the fridge, i think. |
| it's in the fridge, i think.","oh, yes, here it is. do you want a sandwich?"
|
| "oh, yes, here it is. do you want a sandwich?","yes, that sounds nice."
|
| "yes, that sounds nice.","how about some potato chips?"
|
| "how about some potato chips?","yes. and a pickle, if we have any."
|
| "it's time for your bath, young lady.but, mom, i'm not dirty."
|
| "but, mom, i'm not dirty.you need a bath every day. |
| you need a bath every day.why? |
| why?because you don't want to smell bad."
|
| "because you don't want to smell bad.i don't smell bad."
|
| "i don't smell bad.that's what you think."
|
| "that's what you think.if i smelled bad, i could smell me. |
| if i smelled bad, i could smell me.i can smell you. |
| i can smell you.i can smell you, too. |
| i can smell you, too.that's my perfume."
|
| "that's my perfume.when can i wear perfume? |
| something's wrong with my computer.","exactly what?"
|
| "exactly what?","all i get is a black screen."
|
| "all i get is a black screen.","what's the matter? |
| what's the matter?","i think i know, because this happened before."
|
| "i think i know, because this happened before.","what happened before?"
|
| "what happened before?","my hard drive crashed."
|
| "my hard drive crashed.","oh, no. that's bad news. |
| oh, no. that's bad news.","it sure is, but i'm going to call hp first, just to make sure. |
| it sure is, but i'm going to call hp first, just to make sure.","will you lose all your files?"
|
| "will you lose all your files?","no, i always back up my files."
|
| "no, i always back up my files.","you're smart. |
| i called hp about my computer.what did they say? |
| what did they say?they said i need a new hard drive. |
| they said i need a new hard drive.that's too bad. how much is a new one?"
|
| "that's too bad. how much is a new one?it's not too much, only about $85."
|
| "it's not too much, only about $85.plus installation? |
| plus installation?no, my hard drive is easy to remove and replace. |
| no, my hard drive is easy to remove and replace.really? |
| really?yes, it's just a couple of screws."
|
| "yes, it's just a couple of screws.that's nice."
|
| "that's nice.it's a lot better than paying someone $60."
|
| "it's a lot better than paying someone $60.if my hard drive crashes, i'll just call you."
|
| "what's your email address?it's bluedog123."
|
| "it's bluedog123.bluedog123. are you sure that's all?"
|
| "bluedog123. are you sure that's all?yes. |
| yes.no. that's incomplete."
|
| "no. that's incomplete.what do you mean? |
| what do you mean?what's your mailing address?"
|
| "what's your mailing address?456 cherry drive, pasadena, ca 91170. |
| 456 cherry drive, pasadena, ca 91170.that's correct."
|
| "that's correct.so what's the problem?"
|
| "so what's the problem?bluedog123 is just the street. you have to give me the city, state, and zip code. |
| bluedog123 is just the street. you have to give me the city, state, and zip code.oh, i get it. my email address is bluedog123@yahoo.com. |
| i'm going to take a nap.","you should unplug the phone."
|
| "you should unplug the phone.","that's a good idea. |
| that's a good idea.","do you want me to wake you in an hour?"
|
| "do you want me to wake you in an hour?","no, thanks. just let me sleep until i wake up."
|
| "no, thanks. just let me sleep until i wake up.","i'll start dinner at 6:00. |
| i'll start dinner at 6:00.","okay. i think i'll be awake by then. |
| okay. i think i'll be awake by then.","if not, your nose will wake you up."
|
| "if not, your nose will wake you up.","you mean i will smell the food cooking?"
|
| "you mean i will smell the food cooking?","you might even dream about dinner."
|
| "you might even dream about dinner.","i don't think i'm going to dream about anything. i'm really tired. |
| i don't think i'm going to dream about anything. i'm really tired.","have a nice nap."
|
| "that was a nice funeral.","yes, dad, it was."
|
| "yes, dad, it was.","the son gave a nice speech about his father."
|
| "the son gave a nice speech about his father.","it was long, too."
|
| "it was long, too.","i think it was about 45 minutes long."
|
| "i think it was about 45 minutes long.","but it went by fast. it was interesting."
|
| "but it went by fast. it was interesting.","i liked it."
|
| "i liked it.","i'll give you a speech like that, too. |
| i'll give you a speech like that, too.","do you think anyone will come to my funeral?"
|
| "do you think anyone will come to my funeral?","of course."
|
| "of course.","i think only the family will be there."
|
| "i think only the family will be there.","you have lots of friends. they will be there, too!"
|
| "yikes! what was that noise?","i had to blow my nose."
|
| "i had to blow my nose.","did you have to blow right next to the phone?"
|
| "did you have to blow right next to the phone?","did you hear that?"
|
| "did you hear that?","of course i heard that. i thought a plane had crashed into your house."
|
| "of course i heard that. i thought a plane had crashed into your house.","it wasn't that loud. |
| it wasn't that loud.","i will blow my nose sometime for you, and you'll see. |
| i will blow my nose sometime for you, and you'll see.","okay. i'll take your word for it. |
| okay. i'll take your word for it.","i thought you had an elephant in your house."
|
| "i thought you had an elephant in your house.","you're funny. |
| you're funny.","what did you say? i think i've gone deaf. |
| what did you say? i think i've gone deaf.","i'm going into the bathroom to blow my nose. i'll be right back."
|
| "i have lots of friends.","really? how many do you have?"
|
| "really? how many do you have?","i don't know, maybe one hundred. |
| i don't know, maybe one hundred.","that is a lot of friends. do you have a best friend?"
|
| "that is a lot of friends. do you have a best friend?","of course. i have lots of best friends."
|
| "of course. i have lots of best friends.","how many best friends do you have?"
|
| "how many best friends do you have?","i think about twenty-five."
|
| "i think about twenty-five.","hmm. i have only one best friend."
|
| "hmm. i have only one best friend.","i feel sorry for you."
|
| "i feel sorry for you.","i have only a few friends."
|
| "i have only a few friends.","you must be lonely. i will share my friends with you."
|
| "you must be lonely. i will share my friends with you.","that's very nice of you. |
| don't you ever cheat on me.","why would i do that?"
|
| "why would i do that?","because men like to cheat."
|
| "because men like to cheat.","some men do, but not me."
|
| "some men do, but not me.","i'm watching you. |
| i'm watching you.","i'm an open book. watch me all you want. |
| i'm an open book. watch me all you want.","if i catch you, you'll be sorry. |
| if i catch you, you'll be sorry.","you won't catch me, because i love you. i'm not a cheater."
|
| "you won't catch me, because i love you. i'm not a cheater.","i will poke your eyes out."
|
| "i will poke your eyes out. ","i don't want any other woman. |
| i don't want any other woman.","i will chop your toes off, one by one."
|
| "i will chop your toes off, one by one.","honey, please. you're the only woman for me, forever. i swear it. |
| i hate to go outside.me too. |
| me too.why do you hate to go outside? |
| why do you hate to go outside?i meet too many jerks. |
| i meet too many jerks.i agree. |
| i agree.this city is full of jerks. |
| this city is full of jerks.rude people are everywhere. |
| rude people are everywhere.but what can you do? |
| but what can you do?you can yell at them. |
| you can yell at them.and they will yell back at you. |
| and they will yell back at you.yelling doesn't do any good."
|
| "yelling doesn't do any good.no. the best thing to do is just stay home. |
| will you look at this form?are you having problems with it? |
| are you having problems with it?i don't understand some things."
|
| "i don't understand some things.let me help you. |
| let me help you.what does mean? |
| what does mean? stands for middle initial. |
| stands for middle initial.what does mean? |
| what does mean?that means month/day/year. use numbers. |
| that means month/day/year. use numbers.i don't understand."
|
| "i don't understand.for example, if your birth date is january 12, 1987, write 01/12/87. |
| for example, if your birth date is january 12, 1987, write 01/12/87.oh. that's simple enough."
|
| "oh. that's simple enough.always print clearly, and fill in the bubbles completely. |
| let's go to the animal shelter.","what do you want to do?"
|
| "what do you want to do?","i want to get a puppy for my son."
|
| "i want to get a puppy for my son.","that will make him so happy."
|
| "that will make him so happy.","i'll get him one of those little dogs. |
| i'll get him one of those little dogs.","one that won't grow up too big. |
| one that won't grow up too big.","and eat too much."
|
| "and eat too much.","do you know which one he would like?"
|
| "do you know which one he would like?","oh, yes, i took him there yesterday. he showed me one that he really liked."
|
| "oh, yes, i took him there yesterday. he showed me one that he really liked.","i bet you had to drag him away."
|
| "i bet you had to drag him away.","he wanted to take it home yesterday."
|
| "he wanted to take it home yesterday.","i wonder what he'll name it. |
| what's the weather like?","i don't know. i just woke up. |
| i don't know. i just woke up.","why don't you look outside? |
| why don't you look outside?","okay. it looks like rain."
|
| "okay. it looks like rain.","why do you say that?"
|
| "why do you say that?","the sky is gray."
|
| "the sky is gray.","is it raining right now?"
|
| "is it raining right now?","no."
|
| "no.","how do you know?"
|
| "how do you know?","the street isn't wet. |
| the street isn't wet.","i have to go shopping today."
|
| "i have to go shopping today.","you'd better take an umbrella. |
| i can't believe how hot it is.","it's not even noon yet. |
| it's not even noon yet.","that means it will get hotter."
|
| "that means it will get hotter.","i am dying from the heat."
|
| "i am dying from the heat.","turn on the air conditioner."
|
| "turn on the air conditioner.","it doesn't work. |
| it doesn't work.","what happened?"
|
| "what happened?","i don't know. |
| i don't know.","did you call the repairman?"
|
| "did you call the repairman?","of course."
|
| "of course.","when is he coming?"
|
| "when is he coming?","he's busy. he said next week. |
| i'll be glad when winter comes.","why is that?"
|
| "why is that?","because i love the snow."
|
| "because i love the snow.","yes, the snow is fun."
|
| "yes, the snow is fun.","last year we made a big snowman."
|
| "last year we made a big snowman.","how big was it?"
|
| "how big was it?","it was seven feet tall."
|
| "it was seven feet tall.","how long did it take?"
|
| "how long did it take?","it took us all day."
|
| "it took us all day.","did you give him a nose?"
|
| "did you give him a nose?","of course. we gave him a big carrot for a nose."
|
| "of course. we gave him a big carrot for a nose.","let me help you make one this year."
|
| "i'm going to the bank.what do you need to do? |
| what do you need to do?i need to withdraw some money. |
| i need to withdraw some money.how are you going to do that? |
| how are you going to do that?i'll just use the atm."
|
| "i'll just use the atm.what's that?"
|
| "what's that?it's the automatic teller machine."
|
| "it's the automatic teller machine.it gives you money? |
| it gives you money?i just insert my debit card into the machine. |
| i just insert my debit card into the machine.and it gives you money? |
| and it gives you money?well, it gives me money, but it's my own money."
|
| "well, it gives me money, but it's my own money.oh. what good is that? i thought it gave you free money. |
| did you put the blue bin out on the street?oh, no. i forgot. |
| oh, no. i forgot.well, you'd better take it out front."
|
| "well, you'd better take it out front.what time does the recycle truck come by? |
| what time does the recycle truck come by?it usually gets here at noon on tuesday, which is tomorrow. |
| it usually gets here at noon on tuesday, which is tomorrow.i'll just take it out to the street tomorrow morning."
|
| "i'll just take it out to the street tomorrow morning.oh, no, you don't."
|
| "oh, no, you don't.what do you mean? |
| what do you mean?every morning you get up late and rush off to work late. |
| every morning you get up late and rush off to work late.do you think i'll forget to do it?"
|
| "do you think i'll forget to do it?you'll remember to do it, but you won't have time to do it. |
| you'll remember to do it, but you won't have time to do it.okay, i'll take it out front right now."
|
| "are you ready?","ready for what?"
|
| "ready for what?","ready for the big switch."
|
| "ready for the big switch.","what are you talking about?"
|
| "what are you talking about?","the nation is switching to digital tv."
|
| "the nation is switching to digital tv.","oh. of course i'm ready. |
| oh. of course i'm ready.","did you buy the converter?"
|
| "did you buy the converter?","no, i don't need a converter because i bought a digital tv. |
| no, i don't need a converter because i bought a digital tv.","how much was that?"
|
| "how much was that?","it was only about $120 for a 13-inch screen."
|
| "it was only about $120 for a 13-inch screen.","does it pick up any digital channels?"
|
| "does it pick up any digital channels?","oh, yes. i get six korean channels but nothing in english!"
|
| "people are funny.","they sure are."
|
| "they sure are.","did you hear about the pilot?"
|
| "did you hear about the pilot?","the one that stole a small plane?"
|
| "the one that stole a small plane?","yes, he stole a plane in canada and flew into the u.s."
|
| "yes, he stole a plane in canada and flew into the u.s.","did they catch him?"
|
| "did they catch him?","yes. after two u.s. fighter jets followed him for an hour, he landed on a highway."
|
| "yes. after two u.s. fighter jets followed him for an hour, he landed on a highway.","did he crash?"
|
| "did he crash?","no, he just landed the plane and walked to a restaurant."
|
| "no, he just landed the plane and walked to a restaurant.","did the cops find out why he flew into the u.s.?"
|
| "did the cops find out why he flew into the u.s.?","his life sucked. he was hoping a fighter jet would shoot him down."
|
| "his life sucked. he was hoping a fighter jet would shoot him down.","poor guy."
|
| "the police need our help finding a robber.","how do you know?"
|
| "how do you know?","the tv news is reporting a bank robbery."
|
| "the tv news is reporting a bank robbery.","do they know what the robber looks like?"
|
| "do they know what the robber looks like?","yes, he's 6 feet tall, 200 pounds, black hair, and about 30 years old. |
| yes, he's 6 feet tall, 200 pounds, black hair, and about 30 years old.","what race is he?"
|
| "what race is he?","they didn't say. |
| they didn't say.","the tv news doesn't tell us the race anymore. |
| the tv news doesn't tell us the race anymore.","of course not. that would be racist."
|
| "of course not. that would be racist.","but how can we identify someone if we don't know their race? |
| but how can we identify someone if we don't know their race?","don't ask me. |
| don't ask me.","then they also shouldn't tell us if the robber is male or female, because that is sexist. |
| don't wipe your nose on your sleeve.","but i don't have a tissue. |
| but i don't have a tissue.","then go find a tissue in the bathroom."
|
| "then go find a tissue in the bathroom.","i didn't have time to get one from there. |
| i didn't have time to get one from there.","your sleeves are not tissues."
|
| "your sleeves are not tissues.","but mom, all my friends use their sleeves."
|
| "but mom, all my friends use their sleeves.","that doesn't make it right. |
| that doesn't make it right.","i saw dad wipe his nose on his sleeve yesterday."
|
| "i saw dad wipe his nose on his sleeve yesterday.","i will talk to your father about that."
|
| "i will talk to your father about that.","i bet dad did it all the time when he was my age."
|
| "i bet dad did it all the time when he was my age.","your daddy was a good little boy."
|
| "your daddy was a good little boy.","how do you know? were you his mommy, too?"
|
| "i'm worried.worried about what? |
| worried about what?i'm getting married."
|
| "i'm getting married.you should be happy, not worried. |
| you should be happy, not worried.i am happy, but marriage is a lot of responsibility. |
| i am happy, but marriage is a lot of responsibility.yes, you have to take care of your wife. |
| yes, you have to take care of your wife.and i have to take care of our children. |
| and i have to take care of our children.are you going to start a family? |
| are you going to start a family?yes. we want to have a little boy and a little girl. |
| yes. we want to have a little boy and a little girl.that sounds wonderful. |
| that sounds wonderful.except we can't afford it!"
|
| "except we can't afford it!no wonder you're worried."
|
| "i don't get art.or artists. |
| or artists.they're in a different world."
|
| "they're in a different world.i saw a painting of a jar that was full of pencils. |
| i saw a painting of a jar that was full of pencils.the artist said the jar was both full and empty. |
| the artist said the jar was both full and empty.but it was full of pencils! how could he say it was empty? |
| but it was full of pencils! how could he say it was empty?artists see things differently. |
| artists see things differently.did you ever see anything that picasso painted? |
| did you ever see anything that picasso painted?of course! he's world famous."
|
| "of course! he's world famous.did he ever take art lessons? |
| did he ever take art lessons?i can't believe it. i drew paintings like that in third grade."
|
| "i can't believe it. i drew paintings like that in third grade.where are they? maybe they are worth millions. |
| what's the point?","the point of what?"
|
| "the point of what?","of living."
|
| "of living.","who knows? you live, and then you die."
|
| "who knows? you live, and then you die.","we must be here for some reason."
|
| "we must be here for some reason.","maybe we're here to have fun. |
| maybe we're here to have fun.","then why aren't i having fun? |
| then why aren't i having fun?","because you're thinking too much. |
| because you're thinking too much.","so i should stop thinking?"
|
| "so i should stop thinking?","stop thinking about what the point is."
|
| "stop thinking about what the point is.","okay. i'll start thinking about having some fun. |
| okay. i'll start thinking about having some fun.","just be patient. fun doesn't come along every five minutes. |
| beer is a powerful drug.so are cigarettes. |
| so are cigarettes.which would you prefer? |
| which would you prefer?what do you mean? |
| what do you mean?when you die and go to heaven, they will offer you beer or cigarettes. |
| when you die and go to heaven, they will offer you beer or cigarettes.i could pick only one or the other? |
| i could pick only one or the other?yes. nothing's perfect, not even in heaven."
|
| "yes. nothing's perfect, not even in heaven.boy, that's a tough one."
|
| "boy, that's a tough one.what's so tough about it? of course, i would pick cigarettes."
|
| "what's so tough about it? of course, i would pick cigarettes.but cigarettes taste much better when you have a cold beer. |
| but cigarettes taste much better when you have a cold beer.well, you can't have everything."
|
| "well, you can't have everything.i don't think i want to go to your heaven."
|
| "my pants have a hole in the front pocket.","you shouldn't carry pens in your pocket. |
| you shouldn't carry pens in your pocket.","yesterday a pen fell through my pants onto my shoe."
|
| "yesterday a pen fell through my pants onto my shoe.","lucky for you it wasn't a sharp knife. |
| lucky for you it wasn't a sharp knife.","who carries a sharp knife in their pocket?"
|
| "who carries a sharp knife in their pocket?","criminals, of course."
|
| "criminals, of course.","anyway, i have to fix the hole."
|
| "anyway, i have to fix the hole.","you can sew it up or use an iron-on patch."
|
| "you can sew it up or use an iron-on patch.","tell me about this patch."
|
| "tell me about this patch.","the patch has glue. the hot iron melts the glue so the patch sticks on."
|
| "the patch has glue. the hot iron melts the glue so the patch sticks on.","that sounds a lot easier than sewing."
|
| "that sounds a lot easier than sewing.","it is. but after about ten washings, the glue washes off."
|
| "do you know any good jokes?","i can't remember jokes. |
| i can't remember jokes.","neither can i."
|
| "neither can i.","they go in one ear and out the other."
|
| "they go in one ear and out the other.","who makes up all these jokes?"
|
| "who makes up all these jokes?","who knows? but there must be a hundred new ones every day."
|
| "who knows? but there must be a hundred new ones every day.","yes, just in english alone."
|
| "yes, just in english alone.","i wonder if every language has jokes."
|
| "i wonder if every language has jokes.","of course! people everywhere like good jokes."
|
| "of course! people everywhere like good jokes.","what do you think people joke about the most?"
|
| "what do you think people joke about the most?","i think most jokes are about women."
|
| "i think most jokes are about women.","oh, really? i think most jokes are about men!"
|
| "you're very lucky.why do you say that? |
| why do you say that?you speak two languages. |
| you speak two languages.well, my english isn't perfect."
|
| "well, my english isn't perfect.no one speaks perfect english. |
| no one speaks perfect english.maybe i will be the first! |
| maybe i will be the first!i've been thinking about learning spanish."
|
| "i've been thinking about learning spanish.spanish is easy. i'll be happy to teach you."
|
| "spanish is easy. i'll be happy to teach you.how long will it take me to learn? |
| how long will it take me to learn?i think it will only take you a year or two. |
| i think it will only take you a year or two.how soon can we begin? |
| how soon can we begin?ahora! that means right now. |
| do you know what today is?yes, it's april 22."
|
| "yes, it's april 22.it's more than just a date."
|
| "it's more than just a date.is it your birthday or anniversary? |
| is it your birthday or anniversary?no, it's earth day."
|
| "no, it's earth day.what's that?"
|
| "what's that?it's a yearly reminder to take care of our planet."
|
| "it's a yearly reminder to take care of our planet.oh, you mean like reuse things and recycle stuff? |
| oh, you mean like reuse things and recycle stuff?yes. we need to think green, save water, and stop using plastic bags. |
| yes. we need to think green, save water, and stop using plastic bags.how about if i take shorter showers? |
| how about if i take shorter showers?that's a good idea, because showers waste a lot of water."
|
| "that's a good idea, because showers waste a lot of water.from now on i'll spend only 20 minutes in the shower."
|
| "poetry sucks.","i don't know anyone who likes it. |
| i don't know anyone who likes it.","some of it is okay, i guess."
|
| "some of it is okay, i guess.","yes, the poems that rhyme and are easy to remember."
|
| "yes, the poems that rhyme and are easy to remember.","like "one, two, buckle my shoe.""
|
| "like "one, two, buckle my shoe."","but people still write poems."
|
| "but people still write poems.","no one makes any money at it."
|
| "no one makes any money at it.","shakespeare was a poet."
|
| "shakespeare was a poet.","did he get rich from his poetry?"
|
| "did he get rich from his poetry?","probably not."
|
| "probably not.","poems are a little bit like songs."
|
| "poems are a little bit like songs.","yes, but songs have music. without music, songs would suck, too."
|
| "how smart are you?","i don't know. i think i'm average."
|
| "i don't know. i think i'm average.","did you ever take an iq test?"
|
| "did you ever take an iq test?","no, i never did. all i know is that i got a's and b's in school."
|
| "no, i never did. all i know is that i got a's and b's in school.","i wish i was really smart."
|
| "i wish i was really smart.","don't be ridiculous. |
| don't be ridiculous.","what do you mean?"
|
| "what do you mean?","if you're going to make a wish, wish that you were really rich or famous. |
| if you're going to make a wish, wish that you were really rich or famous.","don't you ever wonder what it's like to be super-smart?"
|
| "don't you ever wonder what it's like to be super-smart?","it must be very lonely."
|
| "it must be very lonely.","why's that? |
| why's that?","because if you're super-smart, no one understands what you're saying."
|
| "i missed the tv news last night. what was on?","nothing that would pass as news."
|
| "nothing that would pass as news.","what's the weather going to be like this weekend? |
| what's the weather going to be like this weekend?","i don't know. whenever the weather comes on, i switch channels. |
| i don't know. whenever the weather comes on, i switch channels.","what was the lead story on the news?"
|
| "what was the lead story on the news?","some actress was in court for driving without a license."
|
| "some actress was in court for driving without a license.","what was the second story?"
|
| "what was the second story?","some actor married a woman young enough to be his daughter."
|
| "some actor married a woman young enough to be his daughter.","what was the third story?"
|
| "what was the third story?","a bull chased a man in a supermarket."
|
| "a bull chased a man in a supermarket.","wasn't there anything about octo-mom? |
| wasn't there anything about octo-mom?","of course. she's going to hire a nanny for her eight infants. |
| what are you going to do about your death?well, mostly i'll try to avoid it."
|
| "well, mostly i'll try to avoid it.i mean, are you going to get buried or cremated? |
| i mean, are you going to get buried or cremated?my wife and i will be cremated. |
| my wife and i will be cremated.are you going to be buried next to each other? |
| are you going to be buried next to each other?oh, no. our ashes will be shaken into the ocean. |
| oh, no. our ashes will be shaken into the ocean.you're not going to be buried?"
|
| "you're not going to be buried?a coffin costs too much and takes up too much space. |
| a coffin costs too much and takes up too much space.yes, but it will be in a cemetery where your children can visit you. |
| yes, but it will be in a cemetery where your children can visit you.children seldom visit their parents in a cemetery. |
| children seldom visit their parents in a cemetery.that's true. a cemetery is for dead people, not living people."
|
| "that's true. a cemetery is for dead people, not living people.we figure our kids can visit us whenever they go to the beach. |
| did you wipe your feet? yes, of course i wiped my feet. |
| yes, of course i wiped my feet.then why is there mud on the carpet? |
| then why is there mud on the carpet?i don't know. it's not my mud. |
| i don't know. it's not my mud.well, someone brought it into the house. |
| well, someone brought it into the house.look at the bottom of my shoesthey're clean."
|
| "look at the bottom of my shoesthey're clean.of course they're clean. you left all the mud on the carpet."
|
| "of course they're clean. you left all the mud on the carpet.okay, i'll get the vacuum cleaner."
|
| "okay, i'll get the vacuum cleaner.don't vacuum it now."
|
| "don't vacuum it now.don't you want me to clean up the mud?"
|
| "don't you want me to clean up the mud?wait till it dries. it will be easier to vacuum. |
| wait till it dries. it will be easier to vacuum.next time i will be more careful. |
| what are you getting for your mom?what are you talking about? |
| what are you talking about?sunday is mother's day."
|
| "sunday is mother's day.this sunday? |
| this sunday?of course. it's all over the news."
|
| "of course. it's all over the news.i thought it was next sunday. |
| i thought it was next sunday.well, you'd better get her something."
|
| "well, you'd better get her something.i'll get her a nice card."
|
| "i'll get her a nice card.is that it? |
| is that it?yes. that's all i ever give her."
|
| "yes. that's all i ever give her.she raised you, and all you ever give her is a card? |
| she raised you, and all you ever give her is a card?it's okay. she knows that i love her."
|
| "i don't like our flag.what's the matter with it?"
|
| "what's the matter with it?it's too much like other flags."
|
| "it's too much like other flags.yes, a lot of flags have stripes. |
| yes, a lot of flags have stripes.a flag should be pretty. |
| a flag should be pretty.what should our flag look like? |
| what should our flag look like?it should have a pretty woman on it. |
| it should have a pretty woman on it.that's ridiculous!"
|
| "that's ridiculous!you don't like pretty women?"
|
| "you don't like pretty women?of course i do. but not on our flag! |
| of course i do. but not on our flag!every nation should have a pretty woman on their flag. |
| every nation should have a pretty woman on their flag.you can't go to war carrying a flag with a woman on it!"
|
| "i had a busy morning.","what did you do?"
|
| "what did you do?","i watered all the plants."
|
| "i watered all the plants.","you have a lot of plants."
|
| "you have a lot of plants.","then i did my laundry."
|
| "then i did my laundry.","that takes some time."
|
| "that takes some time.","i took the dog for a walk."
|
| "i took the dog for a walk.","i'll bet he enjoyed his walk. |
| i'll bet he enjoyed his walk.","i vacuumed the entire house."
|
| "i vacuumed the entire house.","that's a lot of work. |
| that's a lot of work.","and then i made lunch."
|
| "and then i made lunch.","i'll bet you were hungry! |
| i don't have long distance service with my home phone.","so how do you make long distance calls?"
|
| "so how do you make long distance calls?","i use a calling card."
|
| "i use a calling card.","where do you get that?"
|
| "where do you get that?","i buy it at the dollar store."
|
| "i buy it at the dollar store.","how much is it?"
|
| "how much is it?","it's one dollar for 100 minutes. |
| it's one dollar for 100 minutes.","that's only a penny a minute! |
| that's only a penny a minute!","it's a great price. but you have to dial a lot of numbers. |
| it's a great price. but you have to dial a lot of numbers.","how many?"
|
| "how many?","first you dial seven numbers, then ten numbers, then ten more numbers."
|
| "first you dial seven numbers, then ten numbers, then ten more numbers.","yikes. i think i'll keep my long distance service. |
| do you go to college?yes, i do. |
| yes, i do.what college do you go to? |
| what college do you go to?i go to pasadena city college. |
| i go to pasadena city college.do you like it? |
| do you like it?oh, yes, i really like it. |
| oh, yes, i really like it.why do you like it? |
| why do you like it?because it has great teachers. |
| because it has great teachers.what else? |
| what else?i like all my classmates, too. |
| i like all my classmates, too.anything else? |
| anything else?yes. it's not expensive!"
|
| "i lost my new pen.","where did you lose it?"
|
| "where did you lose it?","i don't know. |
| i don't know.","when did you lose it?"
|
| "when did you lose it?","i think i lost it today. i used it yesterday."
|
| "i think i lost it today. i used it yesterday.","did you check all your pockets?"
|
| "did you check all your pockets?","i checked all my pockets."
|
| "i checked all my pockets.","did you look in your desk?"
|
| "did you look in your desk?","yes. it isn't there, either. |
| yes. it isn't there, either.","it's probably around somewhere. |
| it's probably around somewhere.","oh, well, it only cost me a dollar."
|
| "oh, well, it only cost me a dollar.","only a dollar? don't even look for it. |
| gravity is very important.what is gravity? |
| what is gravity?it's the force that pulls everything down."
|
| "it's the force that pulls everything down.i don't understand."
|
| "i don't understand.if you pour water into a glass, the water goes down into the glass. |
| if you pour water into a glass, the water goes down into the glass.of course it does. |
| of course it does.without gravity, the water would go up. |
| without gravity, the water would go up.you're joking."
|
| "you're joking.without gravity, you would go up. |
| without gravity, you would go up.what do you mean? |
| what do you mean?you would float into the sky like a balloon. |
| you would float into the sky like a balloon.that would be fun! |
| i can't read my book.","turn on the light."
|
| "turn on the light.","the light is on."
|
| "the light is on.","open the book."
|
| "open the book.","the book is open."
|
| "the book is open.","see an eye doctor."
|
| "see an eye doctor.","that's what i need to do. |
| that's what i need to do.","he'll give you a prescription for glasses. |
| he'll give you a prescription for glasses.","i'll make an appointment tomorrow. |
| i'll make an appointment tomorrow.","i'll get the yellow pages for an eye doctor. |
| i'll get the yellow pages for an eye doctor.","read the phone number to me."
|
| "read the phone number to me.","i'll read it very loud, in case your hearing is getting bad, too. |
| what do you need for school?i need pencils. |
| i need pencils.anything else? |
| anything else?i need a notebook. |
| i need a notebook.do you need a pen? |
| do you need a pen?no. i already have a pen. |
| no. i already have a pen.do you need a calculator? |
| do you need a calculator?no. the teacher doesn't permit calculators."
|
| "no. the teacher doesn't permit calculators.how about a dictionary? |
| how about a dictionary?no, we have a big dictionary in the classroom. |
| no, we have a big dictionary in the classroom.well, i guess that's it."
|
| "well, i guess that's it.yes, that's all i need for now."
|
| "i like this magazine.","so do i."
|
| "so do i.","i read it once, and i subscribed."
|
| "i read it once, and i subscribed.","it gives you all the news."
|
| "it gives you all the news.","all the news in only 50 pages."
|
| "all the news in only 50 pages.","i like the political cartoons."
|
| "i like the political cartoons.","i like the beautiful photos of the houses for sale."
|
| "i like the beautiful photos of the houses for sale.","i always read the film reviews."
|
| "i always read the film reviews.","i never miss the food and drink section."
|
| "i never miss the food and drink section.","i gave a subscription to my parents."
|
| "i gave a subscription to my parents.","me too. they canceled their other news magazines."
|
| "me too. they canceled their other news magazines.","so did mine!"
|
| "my pen is out of ink.","shake it a couple of times."
|
| "shake it a couple of times.","i shook it. there is no more ink."
|
| "i shook it. there is no more ink.","you can borrow mine."
|
| "you can borrow mine.","thank you. i'll buy a new one tomorrow. |
| thank you. i'll buy a new one tomorrow.","what were you doing?"
|
| "what were you doing?","i was writing a letter."
|
| "i was writing a letter.","who were you writing to?"
|
| "who were you writing to?","it's to my mom. |
| it's to my mom.","tell her i said hello."
|
| "tell her i said hello.","okay. i'll return your pen when i'm done."
|
| "okay. i'll return your pen when i'm done.","take your time."
|
| "have you done your homework?","not yet."
|
| "not yet.","then why are you watching tv?"
|
| "then why are you watching tv?","this is my favorite show."
|
| "this is my favorite show.","go do your homework."
|
| "go do your homework.","but, mom!"
|
| "but, mom!","you can watch tv after you do your homework."
|
| "you can watch tv after you do your homework.","but the show will be over."
|
| "but the show will be over.","there will be another show next week."
|
| "there will be another show next week.","please?"
|
| "please?","you know the rules."
|
| "you know the rules.","i hate the rules! i can't wait till i grow up. |
| i can't wait until i graduate.","me too."
|
| "me too.","no more homework."
|
| "no more homework.","i hate homework."
|
| "i hate homework.","are you going to college?"
|
| "are you going to college?","i can't afford it. |
| i can't afford it.","me neither."
|
| "me neither.","so what are you going to do?"
|
| "so what are you going to do?","i'm joining the army. |
| i'm joining the army.","you're kidding. you might get killed. |
| you're kidding. you might get killed.","i don't think so. after i finish, i'll have enough money to go to college."
|
| "i don't think so. after i finish, i'll have enough money to go to college.","that's not a bad idea. |
| what is your major?english. |
| english.what are you going to do with an english major? |
| what are you going to do with an english major?i'm going to be a teacher."
|
| "i'm going to be a teacher.high school or middle school? |
| high school or middle school?high school. |
| high school.i teach high school english. |
| i teach high school english.i didn't know that."
|
| "i didn't know that.i started teaching five years ago. |
| i started teaching five years ago.how do you like it? |
| how do you like it?do you see all this gray hair? it was totally black five years ago. |
| do you see all this gray hair? it was totally black five years ago.maybe i'll teach middle school."
|
| "parking at school is impossible.","i'll say. |
| i'll say.","i drove around for half an hour."
|
| "i drove around for half an hour.","did you find a spot?"
|
| "did you find a spot?","i found a spot, but someone cut in and took it from me."
|
| "i found a spot, but someone cut in and took it from me.","did you yell at them?"
|
| "did you yell at them?","yes, i did."
|
| "yes, i did.","and?"
|
| "and?","and he yelled back at me."
|
| "and he yelled back at me.","how rude."
|
| "how rude.","but i got lucky a few minutes later."
|
| "but i got lucky a few minutes later.","you have to be lucky to find a parking space."
|
| "this is a huge library.","yes, it has lots of rooms and lots of space."
|
| "yes, it has lots of rooms and lots of space.","and lots of books."
|
| "and lots of books.","and lots of thieves."
|
| "and lots of thieves.","what do you mean?"
|
| "what do you mean?","i mean, keep your belongings close to you."
|
| "i mean, keep your belongings close to you.","the only thing in my backpack is used books."
|
| "the only thing in my backpack is used books.","but thieves don't know that. |
| but thieves don't know that.","they might think that i've got an ipod or laptop in there. |
| they might think that i've got an ipod or laptop in there.","now you're thinking. |
| now you're thinking.","you'd think a library would be safe from thieves. |
| you'd think a library would be safe from thieves.","not even a church is safe from thieves."
|
| "how good is your math?","i can add two and two."
|
| "i can add two and two.","so you're not very good at math? |
| so you're not very good at math?","i'm terrible at math. |
| i'm terrible at math.","well, i need some help."
|
| "well, i need some help.","with what?"
|
| "with what?","i'm taking a math course in school. |
| i'm taking a math course in school.","well, you should ask your teacher or your classmates for help."
|
| "well, you should ask your teacher or your classmates for help.","i can't do that. |
| i can't do that.","why not?"
|
| "why not?","they might think i'm stupid. |
| they might think i'm stupid.","they're not going to think that! they'll be glad to help you."
|
| "do you believe in god?","of course."
|
| "of course.","do you pray to god?"
|
| "do you pray to god?","occasionally."
|
| "occasionally.","when's that? |
| when's that?","when i need something."
|
| "when i need something.","like what?"
|
| "like what?","well, if i have a big test at school."
|
| "well, if i have a big test at school.","does god answer your prayers?"
|
| "does god answer your prayers?","yes, i've passed all my tests. |
| yes, i've passed all my tests.","do you ever pray for money?"
|
| "do you ever pray for money?","not yet. i won't need to do that until i graduate from high school. |
| the cops finally found the husband.what husband? |
| what husband?the husband of the driver who ran over two college students at 3 a.m. |
| the husband of the driver who ran over two college students at 3 a.m.oh, yeah. the girl died instantly, and the boy is still in the hospital. |
| oh, yeah. the girl died instantly, and the boy is still in the hospital.the husband said he tried to help the boy. |
| the husband said he tried to help the boy.yes, he pushed him off the hood of the car. |
| yes, he pushed him off the hood of the car.no, he said he gently placed the boy on the street. |
| no, he said he gently placed the boy on the street.so what? they still drove off. |
| so what? they still drove off.the husband said a fire department was nearby. |
| the husband said a fire department was nearby.so what? did he dial 911? |
| so what? did he dial 911?he said he was thinking about it, but he didn't get around to it."
|
| "he said he was thinking about it, but he didn't get around to it.he didn't get around to turning himself in, either."
|
| "i don't like riding the bus.why not? |
| why not?the seats and windows are dirty. |
| the seats and windows are dirty.don't they clean the bus every night?"
|
| "don't they clean the bus every night?i think they do. |
| i think they do.you should bring some wipes with you. |
| you should bring some wipes with you.that's a good idea."
|
| "that's a good idea.then you can wipe your seat and window. |
| then you can wipe your seat and window.people will think i'm strange."
|
| "people will think i'm strange.who cares? everyone is strange. |
| who cares? everyone is strange.that's for sure."
|
| "that's for sure.don't worry about what people think."
|
| "i don't like riding the bus.why not? |
| why not?number one, it's too slow."
|
| "number one, it's too slow.you're right. a car is faster."
|
| "you're right. a car is faster.number two, it's usually late."
|
| "number two, it's usually late.you're right. the buses are never on time."
|
| "you're right. the buses are never on time.number three, it doesn't run 24 hours."
|
| "number three, it doesn't run 24 hours.you're right. buses don't run late at night. |
| you're right. buses don't run late at night.number four, it's too crowded."
|
| "number four, it's too crowded.you're right. you have to stand in the aisle."
|
| "you're right. you have to stand in the aisle.number five, it's unsafe."
|
| "number five, it's unsafe.you're right. bad guys might rob you."
|
| "we had a problem at school.","what was the problem?"
|
| "what was the problem?","someone cut the tires."
|
| "someone cut the tires.","what tires?"
|
| "what tires?","the tires on the cars."
|
| "the tires on the cars.","where were the cars?"
|
| "where were the cars?","they were in the student parking lot."
|
| "they were in the student parking lot.","how many tires were cut?"
|
| "how many tires were cut?","one or two tires were cut on each car."
|
| "one or two tires were cut on each car.","how many cars?"
|
| "how many cars?","eleven cars."
|
| "eleven cars.","that's terrible. i hope they catch the person. |
| life isn't fair.","it sure isn't. |
| it sure isn't.","i got a ticket yesterday."
|
| "i got a ticket yesterday.","what for?"
|
| "what for?","i was crossing the street."
|
| "i was crossing the street.","were you in a crosswalk?"
|
| "were you in a crosswalk?","yes, but the red hand was blinking."
|
| "yes, but the red hand was blinking.","so? that's a ticket? |
| so? that's a ticket?","yes, it's a $140 ticket. |
| yes, it's a $140 ticket.","that's not right! |
| that's not right!","when i started to cross the street, the white walk sign was blinking."
|
| "when i started to cross the street, the white walk sign was blinking.","you need to walk faster."
|
| "you're driving too fast.why do you say that? |
| why do you say that?the speed limit is 65. |
| the speed limit is 65.i know that. |
| i know that.but you're doing 75."
|
| "but you're doing 75.so is everyone else. |
| so is everyone else.but a cop might stop you. |
| but a cop might stop you.no, he won't. some cars are doing 85."
|
| "no, he won't. some cars are doing 85.so the cop will stop those cars? |
| so the cop will stop those cars?of course. he stops the fastest cars. |
| of course. he stops the fastest cars.my friend got a ticket for doing 75. |
| my friend got a ticket for doing 75.your friend was unlucky. |
| remember to put air in your tires.how often do i have to do that? |
| how often do i have to do that?once every two months. |
| once every two months.that's a lot."
|
| "that's a lot.what do you mean? |
| what do you mean?that's six times a year!"
|
| "that's six times a year!yes, and it takes about five minutes each time. |
| yes, and it takes about five minutes each time.i'll try."
|
| "i'll try.check your tires or you'll get a flat."
|
| "check your tires or you'll get a flat.oh. that's not good."
|
| "oh. that's not good.no, it isn't. a flat costs you time and money."
|
| "no, it isn't. a flat costs you time and money.and i don't have either."
|
| "you're driving too fast.i'm in a hurry."
|
| "i'm in a hurry.don't ever be in a hurry."
|
| "don't ever be in a hurry.it's not my fault. you didn't wake me up. |
| it's not my fault. you didn't wake me up.that's not my fault. you didn't tell me to wake you up. |
| that's not my fault. you didn't tell me to wake you up.well, i meant to. |
| well, i meant to.don't ever be in a hurry when you're driving. |
| don't ever be in a hurry when you're driving.why not? |
| why not?because you'll have an accident. most accidents are because people are in a hurry."
|
| "because you'll have an accident. most accidents are because people are in a hurry.how do you know that? |
| how do you know that?i read a lot. |
| i read a lot.i thought drunks caused most accidents. |
| let's go for a ride.","where are we going?"
|
| "where are we going?","into the mountains."
|
| "into the mountains.","that sounds nice."
|
| "that sounds nice.","i want to show you my new car."
|
| "i want to show you my new car.","you bought a new car?"
|
| "you bought a new car?","yes. i bought a cadillac."
|
| "yes. i bought a cadillac.","a luxury car."
|
| "a luxury car.","luxury plus speed."
|
| "luxury plus speed.","what are we waiting for?"
|
| "what are we waiting for?","let me get the keys."
|
| "let me get the keys.","let me get my camera."
|
| "i have to go to the bathroom.","why didn't you go before we left? |
| why didn't you go before we left?","i did, but i have to go again."
|
| "i did, but i have to go again.","well, hold on a little longer."
|
| "well, hold on a little longer.","i think i'm going to explode. |
| i think i'm going to explode.","just hold on."
|
| "just hold on.","oh! don't hit any more bumps! |
| oh! don't hit any more bumps!","we'll be at mcdonald's in just a few minutes."
|
| "we'll be at mcdonald's in just a few minutes.","i hope they are fast minutes."
|
| "i hope they are fast minutes.","think about something else. think about a hamburger."
|
| "think about something else. think about a hamburger.","i'm thinking, but i still have to go. |
| i'm thinking, but i still have to go.","it's the next exit. hold on! |
| where's the car?","what do you mean?"
|
| "what do you mean?","the car isn't here. |
| the car isn't here.","where did you park it?"
|
| "where did you park it?","i parked it right here."
|
| "i parked it right here.","are you sure?"
|
| "are you sure?","yes. i remember this big tree."
|
| "yes. i remember this big tree.","maybe it's the wrong tree. |
| maybe it's the wrong tree.","no, this is the tree."
|
| "no, this is the tree.","did someone steal it?"
|
| "did someone steal it?","i sure hope not."
|
| "i sure hope not.","maybe they towed it away."
|
| "look at this traffic.","i'd rather not. |
| i'd rather not.","it gets worse every year."
|
| "it gets worse every year.","why are you complaining? we're going almost 20 miles an hour. |
| why are you complaining? we're going almost 20 miles an hour.","the speed limit is 65!"
|
| "the speed limit is 65!","well, that's between 2:00 and 4:00 a.m. |
| well, that's between 2:00 and 4:00 a.m.","where are all these people going?"
|
| "where are all these people going?","they're all asking the same question. |
| they're all asking the same question.","when are they going to fix this problem?"
|
| "when are they going to fix this problem?","they said they need more money."
|
| "they said they need more money.","they always need more money."
|
| "they always need more money.","it'll get worse before it gets better. |
| did you see that car?yes, he went through the red light. |
| yes, he went through the red light.can we call the police? |
| can we call the police?no, the police don't care."
|
| "no, the police don't care.why not? |
| why not?they have to see it happen. |
| they have to see it happen.they don't believe us?"
|
| "they don't believe us?no. they can only give a ticket if they see it happen. |
| no. they can only give a ticket if they see it happen.so, what do we do? |
| so, what do we do?we don't do anything."
|
| "we don't do anything.maybe we should honk the horn next time. |
| maybe we should honk the horn next time.the driver will just honk back at us. |
| my car is dirty.why don't you wash it?"
|
| "why don't you wash it?that's what i'm going to do. |
| that's what i'm going to do.are you going to wash it yourself? |
| are you going to wash it yourself?of course. it's not a hard job."
|
| "of course. it's not a hard job.i'll help you."
|
| "i'll help you.okay, i'll get a bucket."
|
| "okay, i'll get a bucket.i'll rinse the car first."
|
| "i'll rinse the car first.then we can scrub it with a wet sponge and soap. |
| then we can scrub it with a wet sponge and soap.after that, we can dry it with a towel. |
| after that, we can dry it with a towel.then it will look like new |
| then it will look like newand you save $10. |
| it sure is windy today.paper is flying everywhere. |
| paper is flying everywhere.this wind is dangerous for drivers. |
| this wind is dangerous for drivers.especially for drivers of big trucks. |
| especially for drivers of big trucks.the wind blows those trucks over. |
| the wind blows those trucks over.it blows trees over, too. |
| it blows trees over, too.a tree fell onto my dad's car."
|
| "a tree fell onto my dad's car.was there much damage? |
| was there much damage?my dad had to buy a new car. |
| my dad had to buy a new car.wow! that's terrible."
|
| "wow! that's terrible.never park your car under a tree. |
| never park your car under a tree.the wind will get you, or the birds will get you. |
| when are we going to stop?we'll stop at the next mcdonald's. |
| we'll stop at the next mcdonald's.how far away is that? |
| how far away is that?i think we'll be there in half an hour."
|
| "i think we'll be there in half an hour.i hope so. i have to go to the bathroom. |
| i hope so. i have to go to the bathroom.well, i can always pull over. |
| well, i can always pull over.no, thank you, i'll just wait."
|
| "no, thank you, i'll just wait.we can kill two birds with one stone. |
| we can kill two birds with one stone.what do you mean? |
| what do you mean?while you're using the bathroom, i'll order some food. |
| while you're using the bathroom, i'll order some food.don't order for me. i'm not hungry. |
| don't order for me. i'm not hungry.i'm very hungry. i'll order for you, and then i'll eat yours."
|
| "this is such a long light.","look how many cars are waiting in line."
|
| "look how many cars are waiting in line.","they need a left-turn arrow."
|
| "they need a left-turn arrow.","only two cars can make a left turn every three or four minutes."
|
| "only two cars can make a left turn every three or four minutes.","we'll be here forever. |
| we'll be here forever.","get out of this lane."
|
| "get out of this lane.","but we need to turn left."
|
| "but we need to turn left.","forget it. go straight."
|
| "forget it. go straight.","then what?"
|
| "then what?","then we'll just make a u-turn. |
| then we'll just make a u-turn.","and then we can turn right at the light."
|
| "and then we can turn right at the light.","good idea. it will be so much quicker."
|
| "i need a cheap car.","how much money do you have?"
|
| "how much money do you have?","$1,000."
|
| "$1,000.","well, that should get you something."
|
| "well, that should get you something.","but i need something that's reliable. |
| but i need something that's reliable.","you need a car with low mileage."
|
| "you need a car with low mileage.","a car that was owned by a little old lady."
|
| "a car that was owned by a little old lady.","where have you looked?"
|
| "where have you looked?","i haven't looked anywhere yet. |
| i haven't looked anywhere yet.","why not?"
|
| "why not?","because i'll never find one for such a low price. |
| because i'll never find one for such a low price.","you're right about that. keep saving your money. |
| good afternoon, officer.your driver's license and registration, please."
|
| "your driver's license and registration, please.here you go. |
| here you go.do you know why i pulled you over? |
| do you know why i pulled you over?i have no idea. all of a sudden i heard your siren. |
| i have no idea. all of a sudden i heard your siren.you rolled through that stop sign back there. |
| you rolled through that stop sign back there.but i stopped! |
| but i stopped!no, you didn't. you slowed down, but you didn't come to a full stop. |
| no, you didn't. you slowed down, but you didn't come to a full stop.well, nobody else does, so why should i? |
| well, nobody else does, so why should i?that's not the attitude of a good driver."
|
| "that's not the attitude of a good driver.but i am a good driver. i've never had a ticket in my life."
|
| "but i am a good driver. i've never had a ticket in my life.well, you've got one now. here. have a nice day."
|
| "$140. i can't believe it.what are you talking about? |
| what are you talking about?i got a ticket downtown for $140. |
| i got a ticket downtown for $140.were you speeding? |
| were you speeding?no, i was crossing the street. |
| no, i was crossing the street.were you jaywalking? |
| were you jaywalking?no, i was in the crosswalk. |
| no, i was in the crosswalk.so why did you get a ticket? |
| so why did you get a ticket?the officer said the red hand was blinking. |
| the officer said the red hand was blinking.was it blinking when you entered the crosswalk? |
| was it blinking when you entered the crosswalk?no, the white walk sign was blinking. |
| no, the white walk sign was blinking.you should fight that ticket. i'll be your witness."
|
| "they were in a crosswalk near school at 3 a.m.","who?"
|
| "who?","two students from usc."
|
| "two students from usc.","what happened?"
|
| "what happened?","a speeding car ran a red light, killing the girl."
|
| "a speeding car ran a red light, killing the girl.","what happened to the other student?"
|
| "what happened to the other student?","he landed on the hood of the car."
|
| "he landed on the hood of the car.","did he get off the hood?"
|
| "did he get off the hood?","no, the car stopped and the passenger pushed the injured student off the hood."
|
| "no, the car stopped and the passenger pushed the injured student off the hood.","i'll bet the car continued on its way. |
| i'll bet the car continued on its way.","of course it did. why stop after you've run over two people? |
| of course it did. why stop after you've run over two people?","i hope they find them and put them in jail for life."
|
| "what happened to your car?","i got a dent in the parking lot."
|
| "i got a dent in the parking lot.","how did you get it?"
|
| "how did you get it?","i don't know. maybe it was from a shopping cart. |
| i don't know. maybe it was from a shopping cart.","those shopping carts are dangerous."
|
| "those shopping carts are dangerous.","especially the metal ones."
|
| "especially the metal ones.","i don't park at a store that uses metal shopping carts. |
| i don't park at a store that uses metal shopping carts.","that's a good idea, but there was a good sale at this store. |
| that's a good idea, but there was a good sale at this store.","did you save any money on the sale?"
|
| "did you save any money on the sale?","yes, i did. i saved about $50."
|
| "yes, i did. i saved about $50.","that's great. |
| that's great.","yes, except this dent will cost about $150."
|
| "did you see "titanic"?","yes. it is a great movie."
|
| "yes. it is a great movie.","i saw it twelve times."
|
| "i saw it twelve times.","i saw it eight times."
|
| "i saw it eight times.","i have the dvd."
|
| "i have the dvd.","so do i."
|
| "so do i.","let's go to your home. |
| let's go to your home.","we can watch my dvd."
|
| "we can watch my dvd.","and then we can go to my home."
|
| "and then we can go to my home.","and watch your dvd."
|
| "and watch your dvd.","i always cry at the end."
|
| "i always cry at the end.","me too. it's so sad. |
| let's play cards.","i don't know any card games. |
| i don't know any card games.","i'll teach you one. |
| i'll teach you one.","okay. what will you teach me?"
|
| "okay. what will you teach me?","it's called poker. |
| it's called poker.","is it easy to learn?"
|
| "is it easy to learn?","yes, it will only take about 30 minutes."
|
| "yes, it will only take about 30 minutes.","okay. teach me how to play."
|
| "okay. teach me how to play.","we each get five cards."
|
| "we each get five cards.","oh, look. i have four tens."
|
| "oh, look. i have four tens.","that's great, but you're not supposed to tell me."
|
| "that's great, but you're not supposed to tell me.","oh. sorry. okay, i don't have four tens. |
| i'm a good card player.","why is that?"
|
| "why is that?","because i watch the other players."
|
| "because i watch the other players.","what do you mean?"
|
| "what do you mean?","people will tell you if they have a good hand."
|
| "people will tell you if they have a good hand.","how do they do that?"
|
| "how do they do that?","for example, a friend of mine licks his lips."
|
| "for example, a friend of mine licks his lips.","when he licks his lips, you know he has a good hand?"
|
| "when he licks his lips, you know he has a good hand?","i know he has a good hand, so i don't bet. |
| i know he has a good hand, so i don't bet.","he never wins your money?"
|
| "he never wins your money?","nope, and it drives him crazy."
|
| "nope, and it drives him crazy.","he knows you can't read his mind. maybe he thinks you're cheating."
|
| "turn the radio down, please.","but i'm listening to it. |
| but i'm listening to it.","well, listen to it more quietly."
|
| "well, listen to it more quietly.","i can't wait till i grow up. |
| i can't wait till i grow up.","what will you do?"
|
| "what will you do?","i will play the radio as loud as i want."
|
| "i will play the radio as loud as i want.","that's okay with me. |
| that's okay with me.","i will have a radio in every room of my house."
|
| "i will have a radio in every room of my house.","remind me to never visit you."
|
| "remind me to never visit you.","all the radios will be on extra loud."
|
| "all the radios will be on extra loud.","your neighbors will hate you."
|
| "your neighbors will hate you.","if they don't like it, they can move. |
| i hope i win the lotto.your chances are very small. |
| your chances are very small.but you can't win if you don't play. |
| but you can't win if you don't play.ha! you can't win if you do play."
|
| "ha! you can't win if you do play.someone has to win. |
| someone has to win.that's what everyone says."
|
| "that's what everyone says.it might as well be me. |
| it might as well be me.that's what everyone says."
|
| "that's what everyone says.you're trying to tell me something."
|
| "you're trying to tell me something.that didn't take long."
|
| "that didn't take long.you think i should quit playing. |
| you think i should quit playing.save your money for school. |
| what's on tv?","nothing much."
|
| "nothing much.","what about the baseball game?"
|
| "what about the baseball game?","it got rained out."
|
| "it got rained out.","rained out?"
|
| "rained out?","yes, rained out."
|
| "yes, rained out.","how could that be?"
|
| "how could that be?","well, you can't play baseball in a rainstorm. |
| well, you can't play baseball in a rainstorm.","i thought they were playing under a dome."
|
| "i thought they were playing under a dome.","the dome doesn't close. |
| the dome doesn't close.","why doesn't it close? |
| why doesn't it close?","who knows? they said they'll fix it before next season. |
| can i try your coffee?sure. here you go. |
| sure. here you go.hmm, that's not bad."
|
| "hmm, that's not bad.there's nothing in it."
|
| "there's nothing in it.what do you mean? |
| what do you mean?i mean, it's just coffee."
|
| "i mean, it's just coffee.i figured that. |
| i figured that.it's not too bitter for you?"
|
| "it's not too bitter for you?it's a little bitter, but it's okay. |
| it's a little bitter, but it's okay.there's no sugar or cream in it."
|
| "there's no sugar or cream in it.no, it's a taste you have to get used to."
|
| "no, it's a taste you have to get used to.sort of like beer. |
| let's take a walk.","what's the weather like? |
| what's the weather like?","let me step outside and see."
|
| "let me step outside and see.","it's a little chilly, right? |
| it's a little chilly, right?","yes, it is."
|
| "yes, it is.","i'll put on my cap. |
| i'll put on my cap.","wear a jacket, too."
|
| "wear a jacket, too.","i wonder if i should bring my gloves."
|
| "i wonder if i should bring my gloves.","maybe you should, just in case it gets colder."
|
| "maybe you should, just in case it gets colder.","i'll put a glove in each pocket. |
| i'll put a glove in each pocket.","we'll get warmer as we walk. |
| we'll get warmer as we walk.","yes, but it gets colder as the sun goes down."
|
| "look at the car chase on tv!","that driver is crazy."
|
| "that driver is crazy.","i can't believe he hasn't crashed."
|
| "i can't believe he hasn't crashed.","how fast is he going?"
|
| "how fast is he going?","they say he's going 80 miles per hour. |
| they say he's going 80 miles per hour.","he's going to kill someone. |
| he's going to kill someone.","look! he just hit that car."
|
| "look! he just hit that car.","oh, my goodness. no one is safe on the streets."
|
| "oh, my goodness. no one is safe on the streets.","now he's slowing down. |
| now he's slowing down.","maybe he ran out of gas."
|
| "maybe he ran out of gas.","look! he just got out of the car and started running."
|
| "look! he just got out of the car and started running.","i hope the police catch him."
|
| "tv news is so stupid.","they shouldn't even call it news. |
| they shouldn't even call it news.","last night they told us about a cat in a sofa."
|
| "last night they told us about a cat in a sofa.","yesterday they told us about a dog in a pipe."
|
| "yesterday they told us about a dog in a pipe.","last week they told us about a bear in a back yard."
|
| "last week they told us about a bear in a back yard.","last month they told us about a mouse in a restaurant."
|
| "last month they told us about a mouse in a restaurant.","the weatherman tells us the temperature in every town."
|
| "the weatherman tells us the temperature in every town.","the sports guy shows us players fighting."
|
| "the sports guy shows us players fighting.","they always tell us "what's next.
|
| what's next."","they always make "what's next
|
| what's next" sound exciting, but it never is.","it's more like news for kids. |
| it's more like news for kids.","they should have kid reporters."
|
| "i love my computer.","computers are so cool."
|
| "computers are so cool.","i love to go online."
|
| "i love to go online.","the internet is amazing."
|
| "the internet is amazing.","you can travel all over the world."
|
| "you can travel all over the world.","i know. i went to china yesterday."
|
| "i know. i went to china yesterday.","what did you do?"
|
| "what did you do?","i stood on the great wall and looked all around."
|
| "i stood on the great wall and looked all around.","what was it like?"
|
| "what was it like?","it was like the real thing."
|
| "it was like the real thing.","it was like being there?"
|
| "it was like being there?","yes, i felt like i was actually there."
|
| "the beatles are the best.","they are the best musical group ever."
|
| "they are the best musical group ever.","i love all their songs."
|
| "i love all their songs.","i don't know which one i like the best. |
| i don't know which one i like the best.","i like the ones i can sing along with."
|
| "i like the ones i can sing along with.","so do i, like "she loves you.""
|
| "so do i, like "she loves you."",""she loves you, yeah, yeah, yeah!...""
|
| ""she loves you, yeah, yeah, yeah!..."",""
and you know you should be glad!""
|
| ""
and you know you should be glad!"","what a great song."
|
| "what a great song.","how about "let it be?""
|
| "how about "let it be?"","oh, yes! "let it be, let it be
""
|
| "oh, yes! "let it be, let it be
"",""
there will be an answer, let it be!""
|
| "let's go to a movie.i'd rather not."
|
| "i'd rather not.why not? |
| why not?you know i don't like crowds."
|
| "you know i don't like crowds.let's go to an early movie."
|
| "let's go to an early movie.okay, that won't be very crowded."
|
| "okay, that won't be very crowded.what would you like to see? |
| what would you like to see?oh, i don't care. you're the one who wants to go out. |
| oh, i don't care. you're the one who wants to go out.well, i want to see |
| well, i want to see what have you heard about it? |
| what have you heard about it?it's based on a true story about a divorced man and his young son."
|
| "it's based on a true story about a divorced man and his young son.well, i hope it has a happy ending. |
| what's your favorite thing to do?","i like to watch people."
|
| "i like to watch people.","that's your favorite thing to do? |
| that's your favorite thing to do?","well, it's one of them. |
| well, it's one of them.","where do you go to watch people?"
|
| "where do you go to watch people?","my girlfriend and i sit outside starbucks."
|
| "my girlfriend and i sit outside starbucks.","that sounds like a good spot."
|
| "that sounds like a good spot.","we watch people walk by with their dogs."
|
| "we watch people walk by with their dogs.","i guess you see lots of different dogs."
|
| "i guess you see lots of different dogs.","we don't even know what kind most of them are. |
| we don't even know what kind most of them are.","there are lots of different kinds, but they all have one thing in common."
|
| "there are lots of different kinds, but they all have one thing in common.","yes, they love to sniff each other when they meet."
|
| "they call him father dollar bill.","yes, he was on the tv news today."
|
| "yes, he was on the tv news today.","every easter sunday he gives away money."
|
| "every easter sunday he gives away money.","is it his money?"
|
| "is it his money?","no. movie stars give him money to give to homeless people."
|
| "no. movie stars give him money to give to homeless people.","how much money does he give away?"
|
| "how much money does he give away?","this year he gave away $15,000."
|
| "this year he gave away $15,000.","that's a lot of money. |
| that's a lot of money.","he gave $100 to people in wheelchairs."
|
| "he gave $100 to people in wheelchairs.","what about the other homeless people?"
|
| "what about the other homeless people?","they got $1 each."
|
| "they got $1 each.","people stood in line just to get one dollar?!"
|
| "old movies are the best.","even though they're in black and white. |
| even though they're in black and white.","a good story is more important than color."
|
| "a good story is more important than color.","actors didn't curse back then. |
| actors didn't curse back then.","and there was no violence."
|
| "and there was no violence.","people today don't like that. |
| people today don't like that.","no, today people like lots of action."
|
| "no, today people like lots of action.","i like a good story."
|
| "i like a good story.","i like to see actors who are like real people."
|
| "i like to see actors who are like real people.","like real people with real problems."
|
| "like real people with real problems.","they still make movies like that."
|
| "they still make movies like that.","yes, but they never make much money."
|
| "do you get pbs on tv?","yes, everybody gets the public broadcasting system."
|
| "yes, everybody gets the public broadcasting system.","it puts me to sleep."
|
| "it puts me to sleep.","tell me about it."
|
| "tell me about it.","a gardening show follows a knitting show."
|
| "a gardening show follows a knitting show.","a cooking show follows a sewing show."
|
| "a cooking show follows a sewing show.","a travel show follows another travel show."
|
| "a travel show follows another travel show.","i'll say! i've gone around the world a dozen times already!"
|
| "i'll say! i've gone around the world a dozen times already!","now they're adding old tv shows to the old movies. |
| now they're adding old tv shows to the old movies.","i sure would like to see something interesting for a change."
|
| "i sure would like to see something interesting for a change.","if more people donate money, pbs could offer new shows."
|
| "if more people donate money, pbs could offer new shows.","who wants to donate? public tv should be free."
|
| "i love to watch "judge judy."","is that a tv show?"
|
| "is that a tv show?","yes. it's on every afternoon. |
| yes. it's on every afternoon.","what's so good about it? |
| what's so good about it?","they have interesting lawsuits."
|
| "they have interesting lawsuits.","such as?"
|
| "such as?","yesterday, a woman complained about a cell phone she bought on ebay."
|
| "yesterday, a woman complained about a cell phone she bought on ebay.","was something wrong with the phone?"
|
| "was something wrong with the phone?","it works only in canada."
|
| "it works only in canada.","did the seller know that?"
|
| "did the seller know that?","yes, and he didn't tell the buyer. |
| yes, and he didn't tell the buyer.","i hope judge judy made the seller take the phone back."
|
| "that woman is a very good singer.","yes, but she looks like a man."
|
| "yes, but she looks like a man.","what difference does it make?"
|
| "what difference does it make?","female singers are supposed to be pretty."
|
| "female singers are supposed to be pretty.","singers are supposed to sound good."
|
| "singers are supposed to sound good.","they should look good, too."
|
| "they should look good, too.","there are lots of ugly men singers."
|
| "there are lots of ugly men singers.","men singers don't have to look good. |
| men singers don't have to look good.","then neither do women singers."
|
| "then neither do women singers.","well, i would never buy her cd."
|
| "well, i would never buy her cd.","but you would buy her cd if she was pretty?"
|
| "but you would buy her cd if she was pretty?","yes. i would buy all of her cds."
|
| "all the tv stations are going to go digital.","yes, that will occur next month."
|
| "yes, that will occur next month.","most of them are already broadcasting in digital."
|
| "most of them are already broadcasting in digital.","the digital signal is very clear."
|
| "the digital signal is very clear.","oh, no, it isn't! |
| oh, no, it isn't!","what do you mean?"
|
| "what do you mean?","i can't get a single channel. |
| i can't get a single channel.","do you have a digital tv?"
|
| "do you have a digital tv?","of course. but i don't have cable. |
| of course. but i don't have cable.","you don't need to have cable, but you do need a good antenna. |
| you don't need to have cable, but you do need a good antenna.","but i have rabbit ears."
|
| "but i have rabbit ears.","rabbit ears aren't strong enough. buy a digital antenna. |
| i've got a date for you.","oh, really?"
|
| "oh, really?","are you interested?"
|
| "are you interested?","maybe. what is she like?"
|
| "maybe. what is she like?","she's got a great personality. |
| she's got a great personality.","uh-oh. that means that she's fat and ugly. |
| uh-oh. that means that she's fat and ugly.","she's cute. |
| she's cute.","okay, so she's not ugly; she's just fat."
|
| "okay, so she's not ugly; she's just fat.","she weighs 98 pounds."
|
| "she weighs 98 pounds.","okay, she's not fat. so what's the problem with her?"
|
| "okay, she's not fat. so what's the problem with her?","who said there is a problem with her?"
|
| "who said there is a problem with her?","the problem is she has no problemsshe's too good for me! |
| i think you're very pretty.","thank you."
|
| "thank you.","would you have dinner with me?"
|
| "would you have dinner with me?","i would like to."
|
| "i would like to.","can i pick you up friday night?"
|
| "can i pick you up friday night?","what time?"
|
| "what time?","eight o'clock. |
| eight o'clock.","that sounds great."
|
| "that sounds great.","we'll go to a french restaurant. |
| we'll go to a french restaurant.","i've never been to a french restaurant. |
| i've never been to a french restaurant.","i think you'll love the food. |
| i think you'll love the food.","i'm not going to eat any snails! |
| you have pretty eyes.thank you. so do you. |
| thank you. so do you.i wish my eyes were blue. |
| i wish my eyes were blue.what's the matter with green eyes?"
|
| "what's the matter with green eyes?nothing, except my favorite color is blue. |
| nothing, except my favorite color is blue.maybe in your next life you'll have blue eyes."
|
| "maybe in your next life you'll have blue eyes.but what if i'm a fish in my next life?"
|
| "but what if i'm a fish in my next life?i think some fish have blue eyes. |
| i think some fish have blue eyes.i hope i don't come back as a fish."
|
| "i hope i don't come back as a fish.i hope i come back as a cat. |
| i hope i come back as a cat.cats have beautiful eyes. |
| cats have beautiful eyes.i would love to have blue cat-eyes. |
| i love you.i love you, too. |
| i love you, too.i loved you the first day i saw you. |
| i loved you the first day i saw you.it was love at first sight? |
| it was love at first sight?yes, it was love at first sight. |
| yes, it was love at first sight.i didn't love you at first."
|
| "i didn't love you at first.i know. i had to chase you for a while. |
| i know. i had to chase you for a while.yes, you chased me and then you caught me. |
| yes, you chased me and then you caught me.now you're mine forever."
|
| "now you're mine forever.and you're mine forever."
|
| "and you're mine forever.we'll grow old together."
|
| "we'll grow old together.and be happy together. |
| i'm in love with that girl.","have you told her?"
|
| "have you told her?","of course not."
|
| "of course not.","why not?"
|
| "why not?","she would laugh at me."
|
| "she would laugh at me.","how do you know?"
|
| "how do you know?","because they always do."
|
| "because they always do.","maybe she's different. |
| maybe she's different.","they're all the same. |
| they're all the same.","just ask her out to dinner."
|
| "just ask her out to dinner.","and then what?"
|
| "and then what?","and then she'll know that you like her. |
| give me a hug.i'm not in the mood."
|
| "i'm not in the mood.what's the matter?"
|
| "what's the matter?i saw you looking at that woman. |
| i saw you looking at that woman.what woman? |
| what woman?you know, that woman with the big boobs. |
| you know, that woman with the big boobs.i was not looking at her. |
| i was not looking at her.you were, too. |
| you were, too.i'm not interested in her."
|
| "i'm not interested in her.then why were you looking at her? |
| then why were you looking at her?i was looking at something else. |
| i was looking at something else.oh, really? then spend tonight looking at the sofa. |
| would you like to go on a blind date?you must be joking. |
| you must be joking.no, i'm serious."
|
| "no, i'm serious.i don't want to date a blind woman."
|
| "i don't want to date a blind woman.a blind date doesn't mean that she is blind!"
|
| "a blind date doesn't mean that she is blind!what does it mean? |
| what does it mean?a blind date is a date with someone you don't know."
|
| "a blind date is a date with someone you don't know.why would i date someone i don't even know?"
|
| "why would i date someone i don't even know?to try something new and exciting. |
| to try something new and exciting.what if i don't like her?"
|
| "what if i don't like her?then you don't date her again."
|
| "i have a date tomorrow night.","really? who with?"
|
| "really? who with?","a girl i met at the market."
|
| "a girl i met at the market.","you met a girl at the supermarket?"
|
| "you met a girl at the supermarket?","she was standing behind me in a really slow line at the checkout counter."
|
| "she was standing behind me in a really slow line at the checkout counter.","what did you say to her?"
|
| "what did you say to her?","i had two pineapples in my cart, and she asked where i had found them."
|
| "i had two pineapples in my cart, and she asked where i had found them.","she asked you about your pineapples?"
|
| "she asked you about your pineapples?","i told her i had gotten the last two on the shelf, but i offered her one of mine."
|
| "i told her i had gotten the last two on the shelf, but i offered her one of mine.","that was nice of you."
|
| "that was nice of you.","she asked me how she could return the favor, so i asked her out."
|
| "she asked me how she could return the favor, so i asked her out.","sometimes a slow line can be a good thing."
|
| "did you have a date friday night?","yes, in fact, i did."
|
| "yes, in fact, i did.","who did you go out with?"
|
| "who did you go out with?","a man i met in a coffee shop."
|
| "a man i met in a coffee shop.","where did you go?"
|
| "where did you go?","we went to a nice restaurant."
|
| "we went to a nice restaurant.","anywhere else?"
|
| "anywhere else?","then we went to a jazz club."
|
| "then we went to a jazz club.","that sounds like a nice date."
|
| "that sounds like a nice date.","yes, it was pleasant."
|
| "yes, it was pleasant.","but you won't date him again? |
| but you won't date him again?","no. he was nice, but there was no chemistry."
|
| "i had the worst date the other night.","what happened?"
|
| "what happened?","first of all, he was half an hour late."
|
| "first of all, he was half an hour late.","that's not a good start. |
| that's not a good start.","then he didn't bother to apologize. |
| then he didn't bother to apologize.","that's rude. |
| that's rude.","then he drove too fast to the restaurant."
|
| "then he drove too fast to the restaurant.","that's dangerous. |
| that's dangerous.","i thought about getting out and taking a taxi home."
|
| "i thought about getting out and taking a taxi home.","what happened at the restaurant?"
|
| "what happened at the restaurant?","we had a $40 meal, and he left a $1 tip!"
|
| "we had a $40 meal, and he left a $1 tip!","i guess you can't go back to that restaurant. |
| i don't like that man.","why not?"
|
| "why not?","he's a dirty old man. |
| he's a dirty old man.","what do you mean?"
|
| "what do you mean?","he's old enough to be my father, yet he asked me out. |
| he's old enough to be my father, yet he asked me out.","well, you can't blame a man for asking. |
| well, you can't blame a man for asking.","he should act his age."
|
| "he should act his age.","but a lot of old people are still interested in dating."
|
| "but a lot of old people are still interested in dating.","they should find a nice hobby."
|
| "they should find a nice hobby.","just wait until you're 50 years old. |
| just wait until you're 50 years old.","dating will be the furthest thing from my mind."
|
| "dating will be the furthest thing from my mind.","that's what you say now. wait till you're 50."
|
| "does your girlfriend ever make you angry?","sometimes."
|
| "sometimes.","what does she do?"
|
| "what does she do?","just yesterday, i told her i wouldn't trade her for all the money in the world. |
| just yesterday, i told her i wouldn't trade her for all the money in the world.","that was a nice thing to say."
|
| "that was a nice thing to say.","that's what i thought. |
| that's what i thought.","what did she say?"
|
| "what did she say?","she laughed! she didn't believe me. |
| she laughed! she didn't believe me.","that wasn't very nice of her. |
| that wasn't very nice of her.","she said that nothing is more important to me than money."
|
| "she said that nothing is more important to me than money.","what did you say?"
|
| "what did you say?","i told her i wouldn't trade her for any other woman in the world. |
| some people have good noses.i wish i had a good nose. mine is way too big. |
| i wish i had a good nose. mine is way too big.i don't mean good-looking. i mean good-smelling."
|
| "i don't mean good-looking. i mean good-smelling.oh. but that can be a curse. |
| oh. but that can be a curse.yes, because you can be too sensitive to odors. |
| yes, because you can be too sensitive to odors.i'll say. my girlfriend has a nose like a drug dog."
|
| "i'll say. my girlfriend has a nose like a drug dog.did she catch you using drugs? |
| did she catch you using drugs?sort of. she knows whenever i sneak a cigarette. |
| sort of. she knows whenever i sneak a cigarette.you don't need a good nose for thatcigarettes stink."
|
| "you don't need a good nose for thatcigarettes stink.but when i sneak just one cigarette in the morning, she can smell it that evening! |
| but when i sneak just one cigarette in the morning, she can smell it that evening!boy, that is a good nose. |
| boy, that is a good nose.i told her she should apply for a job at customs. |
| let's go out to eat.","that sounds like fun."
|
| "that sounds like fun.","where do you want to go?"
|
| "where do you want to go?","let me think a minute."
|
| "let me think a minute.","i feel like chinese."
|
| "i feel like chinese.","that sounds delicious."
|
| "that sounds delicious.","i know a good chinese restaurant."
|
| "i know a good chinese restaurant.","how far away is it?"
|
| "how far away is it?","it's only 10 minutes from here. |
| it's only 10 minutes from here.","do we need reservations?"
|
| "do we need reservations?","oh, no. we can walk right in."
|
| "oh, no. we can walk right in.","let's go now. i'm hungry!"
|
| "i can't believe how long this line is.this is a popular restaurant, isn't it?"
|
| "this is a popular restaurant, isn't it?yes, but it isn't a fast-food restaurant, is it?"
|
| "yes, but it isn't a fast-food restaurant, is it?it's the slowest hamburger in town."
|
| "it's the slowest hamburger in town.that's because they cook it while you wait."
|
| "that's because they cook it while you wait.yes. that's why it's also the best hamburger in town. |
| yes. that's why it's also the best hamburger in town.a great burger and great service. |
| a great burger and great service.yes, the workers are very polite. |
| yes, the workers are very polite.and they're clean."
|
| "and they're clean.i've been coming here for years."
|
| "i've been coming here for years.me too. |
| me too.excuse me. they just called my number. |
| lunch was delicious.thank you. |
| thank you.what kind of soup was that? |
| what kind of soup was that?it was tomato soup. |
| it was tomato soup.that tasted so good. |
| that tasted so good.i put lemon and butter in it. |
| i put lemon and butter in it.the sandwich was good, too. |
| the sandwich was good, too.everyone likes bacon and tomato sandwiches. |
| everyone likes bacon and tomato sandwiches.especially on toast. |
| especially on toast.and the pickles were great, too. |
| and the pickles were great, too.tomorrow we'll have rice and fish for lunch."
|
| "tomorrow we'll have rice and fish for lunch.i can't wait."
|
| "i'm calling the waiter.what's the matter?"
|
| "what's the matter?this steak has too much fat. |
| this steak has too much fat.what do you want the waiter to do? |
| what do you want the waiter to do?bring me a better steak. |
| bring me a better steak.i wouldn't do that."
|
| "i wouldn't do that.why not? |
| why not?they will drop the new steak on the floor, step on it, and then spit on it. |
| they will drop the new steak on the floor, step on it, and then spit on it.you're crazy."
|
| "you're crazy.then the waiter will give you a big smile as he brings you the new steak. |
| then the waiter will give you a big smile as he brings you the new steak.where do you get these crazy ideas? |
| where do you get these crazy ideas?i used to cook in a restaurant! |
| let's leave.","but we just got here."
|
| "but we just got here.","did you see the waiter's hands? |
| did you see the waiter's hands?","no."
|
| "no.","he had dirty fingernails."
|
| "he had dirty fingernails.","really?"
|
| "really?","his nails were black!"
|
| "his nails were black!","that's disgusting. |
| that's disgusting.","and he poured water into our glasses."
|
| "and he poured water into our glasses.","yuck! no water for me."
|
| "yuck! no water for me.","i wonder if the cooks' nails are dirty, too. |
| i wonder if the cooks' nails are dirty, too.","who cares? let's get out of here. |
| this hot bread is delicious.i like this restaurant because they give you free bread. |
| i like this restaurant because they give you free bread.well, i think we are paying for it. |
| well, i think we are paying for it.no. look at the bill when we get it. there's no charge for the bread."
|
| "no. look at the bill when we get it. there's no charge for the bread.it is delicious, especially with butter. |
| it is delicious, especially with butter.i think we should just leave after we fill up on the bread. |
| i think we should just leave after we fill up on the bread.they probably wouldn't like that."
|
| "they probably wouldn't like that.i'm eating so much bread that i'm getting full. |
| i'm eating so much bread that i'm getting full.then stop eating the bread! |
| then stop eating the bread!okay, just one more piece. pass the butter, please. |
| okay, just one more piece. pass the butter, please.if i owned a restaurant, i would never serve hot bread before the main course. |
| if i owned a restaurant, i would never serve hot bread before the main course.that's terrible. i would never go to your restaurant."
|
| "is this a clean restaurant?","well, the tables and chairs look okay."
|
| "well, the tables and chairs look okay.","okay, let's sit down. |
| okay, let's sit down.","check out the silverware."
|
| "check out the silverware.","it passes inspection."
|
| "it passes inspection.","here comes the waiter. see if his hands and nails are clean."
|
| "here comes the waiter. see if his hands and nails are clean.","well, the waiter looked clean, so i guess it's okay to eat here. |
| well, the waiter looked clean, so i guess it's okay to eat here.","you're forgetting about the bathroom. |
| you're forgetting about the bathroom.","i'm going to just hope that the bathroom is clean. |
| i'm going to just hope that the bathroom is clean.","you're not going to examine it before we order dinner? |
| you're not going to examine it before we order dinner?","no, i'd rather not find out that it's dirty, because i'm pretty hungry right now. |
| no, i'd rather not find out that it's dirty, because i'm pretty hungry right now.","me, too. let's forget about germs and focus on food. |
| have you seen our waiter?here he comes now. |
| here he comes now.we've been sitting here for almost 10 minutes."
|
| "we've been sitting here for almost 10 minutes.oops, i guess i was wrong. that isn't our waiter."
|
| "oops, i guess i was wrong. that isn't our waiter.we can give him five more minutes, and then leave. |
| we can give him five more minutes, and then leave.i'll go up front and talk to the manager."
|
| "i'll go up front and talk to the manager.that's a good idea."
|
| "that's a good idea.maybe they'll give us free drinks for waiting so long."
|
| "maybe they'll give us free drinks for waiting so long.maybe he'll send us our waiter immediately."
|
| "maybe he'll send us our waiter immediately.every time we eat out, it's an adventure."
|
| "every time we eat out, it's an adventure.last time, we got seats next to the kitchen. |
| last time, we got seats next to the kitchen.we'll never go there again."
|
| "is this table okay?","no, it's too close to the kitchen door. |
| no, it's too close to the kitchen door.","how about this table?"
|
| "how about this table?","no, it's too close to the front door. |
| no, it's too close to the front door.","this looks like a nice table."
|
| "this looks like a nice table.","no, it's too close to the salad bar. |
| no, it's too close to the salad bar.","okay, i give up."
|
| "okay, i give up.","well, there is one good table."
|
| "well, there is one good table.","great. which one?"
|
| "great. which one?","that one. a group of eight just sat down at it."
|
| "i don't believe the art world.what is it this time? |
| what is it this time?an andy warhol drawing. |
| an andy warhol drawing.he's a famous artist."
|
| "he's a famous artist.he drew two butterflies and a flower on a napkin in a restaurant. |
| he drew two butterflies and a flower on a napkin in a restaurant.did he sign it? |
| did he sign it?yes. |
| yes.is it beautiful? |
| is it beautiful?it's just black ink on a white napkin. and the napkin has food stains!"
|
| "it's just black ink on a white napkin. and the napkin has food stains!so it's not worth much?"
|
| "so it's not worth much?only about $30,000. |
| only about $30,000.without the food stains, it would probably be worth more. |
| can we go to the baseball game?of course. |
| of course.i love baseball. |
| i love baseball.so do i. |
| so do i.i love to eat the peanuts. |
| i love to eat the peanuts.i love to eat the hot dogs. |
| i love to eat the hot dogs.i hope we'll see a home run."
|
| "i hope we'll see a home run.i hope we'll catch a foul ball."
|
| "i hope we'll catch a foul ball.bring a jacket. |
| bring a jacket.yes. it gets a little cool at night. |
| yes. it gets a little cool at night.bring a glove to catch a foul ball. |
| bring a glove to catch a foul ball.no. i'll just use my cap to catch a foul ball."
|
| "golf is a silly game.","it certainly is."
|
| "it certainly is.","you hit a white ball."
|
| "you hit a white ball.","and then you chase it."
|
| "and then you chase it.","and then you hit it again."
|
| "and then you hit it again.","finally, you put the ball into a hole in the ground."
|
| "finally, you put the ball into a hole in the ground.","you do this 18 times, because there are 18 holes."
|
| "you do this 18 times, because there are 18 holes.","what's the point? |
| what's the point?","how can it be fun?"
|
| "how can it be fun?","they pay money to play this silly game!"
|
| "they pay money to play this silly game!","i think golfers have a mental problem."
|
| "i think golfers have a mental problem.","i think they're nuts. |
| do you want to go fishing?yes. that's a good idea."
|
| "yes. that's a good idea.where do you want to go? |
| where do you want to go?we can go to the river. |
| we can go to the river.or we can go to the lake. |
| or we can go to the lake.or we can go to the ocean. |
| or we can go to the ocean.let's go to the lake."
|
| "let's go to the lake.yes. the lake is only 10 miles away. |
| yes. the lake is only 10 miles away.we can be there in 20 minutes. |
| we can be there in 20 minutes.i'll get our fishing rods."
|
| "i'll get our fishing rods.i'll get the bait."
|
| "i'll get the bait.we'll have fresh fish for dinner!"
|
| "baseball is fun.","i like to hit the ball."
|
| "i like to hit the ball.","i like to run around the bases."
|
| "i like to run around the bases.","i like to slide into the bases."
|
| "i like to slide into the bases.","yeah. it's a lot of fun to slide. |
| yeah. it's a lot of fun to slide.","i want to be a baseball player when i grow up."
|
| "i want to be a baseball player when i grow up.","me too. i want to play for the yankees."
|
| "me too. i want to play for the yankees.","not me. i want to play for the dodgers."
|
| "not me. i want to play for the dodgers.","we have to practice every day."
|
| "we have to practice every day.","i don't like practice. |
| i don't like practice.","me neither. it's boring. |
| me neither. it's boring.","but practice makes perfect."
|
| "let's go jogging.that's a good idea."
|
| "that's a good idea.i bought some new shoes. |
| i bought some new shoes.are they comfortable? |
| are they comfortable?they're very comfortable."
|
| "they're very comfortable.how much were they? |
| how much were they?they were on sale for $80. |
| they were on sale for $80.do they help you run faster? |
| do they help you run faster?no, but my feet don't hurt anymore."
|
| "no, but my feet don't hurt anymore.then they're worth every penny."
|
| "then they're worth every penny.you might want to buy a pair. |
| you might want to buy a pair.i'll wait until i wear this pair out."
|
| "tiger is the greatest golfer in the world.","you can say that again."
|
| "you can say that again.","but i'm worried about tiger. |
| but i'm worried about tiger.","why is that?"
|
| "why is that?","because he likes to scuba dive."
|
| "because he likes to scuba dive.","what's wrong with that? |
| what's wrong with that?","it can be dangerous."
|
| "it can be dangerous.","you mean he could drown."
|
| "you mean he could drown.","he shouldn't scuba dive until he retires. |
| he shouldn't scuba dive until he retires.","but he dives to relax."
|
| "but he dives to relax.","he might relax, but it makes me nervous."
|
| "he might relax, but it makes me nervous.","if his wife doesn't mind, you shouldn't mind."
|
| "did you watch that golf tournament?","the one that tiger won?"
|
| "the one that tiger won?","how did he do it?"
|
| "how did he do it?","it was nothing for him."
|
| "it was nothing for him.","he sank a 20-foot putt on the last hole to win by one stroke!"
|
| "he sank a 20-foot putt on the last hole to win by one stroke!","he sank a 25-footer last year at the same tournament to win by one stroke."
|
| "he sank a 25-footer last year at the same tournament to win by one stroke.","i think he is from outer space."
|
| "i think he is from outer space.","no human could possibly play golf that well."
|
| "no human could possibly play golf that well.","whenever he needs a shot to win a tournament, he makes that shot."
|
| "whenever he needs a shot to win a tournament, he makes that shot.","no human can do that."
|
| "no human can do that.","somebody should check his birth record."
|
| "somebody should check his birth record.","i bet it says he was born on mars."
|
| "who's the greatest baseball player?there are so many great players. |
| there are so many great players.yes, but who is the greatest? |
| yes, but who is the greatest?i'd have to say babe ruth."
|
| "i'd have to say babe ruth.most people would say that. |
| most people would say that.he changed the game. |
| he changed the game.yes, he made the home run popular. |
| yes, he made the home run popular.everybody loved him, all over the nation. |
| everybody loved him, all over the nation.he helped make the yankees the best team ever. |
| he helped make the yankees the best team ever.and ruth was a good person, too. |
| and ruth was a good person, too.he always visited hospitals to cheer up sick kids. |
| he always visited hospitals to cheer up sick kids.there will never be another babe. |
| did you hear what happened at the baseball game?no, please tell me. |
| no, please tell me.someone punched out someone. |
| someone punched out someone.that's not nice."
|
| "that's not nice.it's worse than that."
|
| "it's worse than that.how so? |
| how so?two guys got into an argument. |
| two guys got into an argument.i'll bet they were drinking."
|
| "i'll bet they were drinking.a third guy punched one of the two guys. |
| a third guy punched one of the two guys.i'll bet he was drinking, too."
|
| "i'll bet he was drinking, too.the victim hit his head on the concrete steps and died. |
| the victim hit his head on the concrete steps and died.that's terrible. can't people just have fun at a baseball game? |
| i want to go to the ball game.is there a game tonight? |
| is there a game tonight?yes, it starts at 7 p.m. |
| yes, it starts at 7 p.m.can we get tickets? |
| can we get tickets?yes, but only the cheap tickets. |
| yes, but only the cheap tickets.how much are they? |
| how much are they?they're only $5 each."
|
| "they're only $5 each.that's a good price."
|
| "that's a good price.yes, it's cheaper than a hot dog or a beer."
|
| "yes, it's cheaper than a hot dog or a beer.where are the seats? |
| where are the seats?they're behind the outfield."
|
| "they're behind the outfield.maybe we can catch a home run ball. |
| golf is so hard.what's so hard about hitting a little white ball?"
|
| "what's so hard about hitting a little white ball?it's hard if you want to do it right."
|
| "it's hard if you want to do it right.you mean like tiger? |
| you mean like tiger?no, like a good amateur golfer. |
| no, like a good amateur golfer.what's so hard about golf?"
|
| "what's so hard about golf?there are so many things you have to do right. |
| there are so many things you have to do right.like what? |
| like what?like keep your left arm straight, keep your head down, and follow through. |
| like keep your left arm straight, keep your head down, and follow through.yikes! who can remember all that? |
| yikes! who can remember all that?you need to get a lot of lessons when you're really young."
|
| "you need to get a lot of lessons when you're really young.forget it. golf sounds more like work than fun. |
| did you hear about the ball player?the home run hitter on drugs? |
| the home run hitter on drugs?he said a doctor helped him with a personal problem. |
| he said a doctor helped him with a personal problem.he said he wasn't using drugs."
|
| "he said he wasn't using drugs.he apologized to the fans. |
| he apologized to the fans.the league suspended him for 50 games. |
| the league suspended him for 50 games.that will cost him some money. |
| that will cost him some money.yes, about $7 million. |
| yes, about $7 million.that will teach him a good lesson. |
| that will teach him a good lesson.he probably won't use drugs anymore."
|
| "he probably won't use drugs anymore.but it won't stop other players from using drugs."
|
| "but it won't stop other players from using drugs.no. everyone always figures that they won't get caught."
|
| "why is there so much crime?","because parents don't teach their kids right from wrong. |
| because parents don't teach their kids right from wrong.","is that it?"
|
| "is that it?","also, there aren't enough police. |
| also, there aren't enough police.","but there are a lot of police."
|
| "but there are a lot of police.","there's only one police officer per 100 criminals. |
| there's only one police officer per 100 criminals.","can't we hire more police? |
| can't we hire more police?","no. it costs too much money."
|
| "no. it costs too much money.","doesn't crime cost more than police? |
| doesn't crime cost more than police?","yes, it does."
|
| "yes, it does.","so it would be cheaper to hire more police?"
|
| "so it would be cheaper to hire more police?","yes, it would."
|
| "this is a great neighborhood.","yes, it is."
|
| "yes, it is.","people are friendly."
|
| "people are friendly.","yes, they are."
|
| "yes, they are.","the streets and sidewalks are clean."
|
| "the streets and sidewalks are clean.","yes, they are."
|
| "yes, they are.","there's a real nice park nearby. |
| there's a real nice park nearby.","yes, there is."
|
| "yes, there is.","i feel safe here."
|
| "i feel safe here.","there is no crime here."
|
| "there is no crime here.","i wish i could move here."
|
| "i wish i could move here.","maybe you can, if someone moves out."
|
| "the house burned down.","what happened?"
|
| "what happened?","the man fell asleep."
|
| "the man fell asleep.","was he smoking?"
|
| "was he smoking?","yes, he was smoking a cigarette."
|
| "yes, he was smoking a cigarette.","did he die?"
|
| "did he die?","yes, he did. his cat died, too."
|
| "yes, he did. his cat died, too.","that's too bad. what about his smoke alarm? |
| that's too bad. what about his smoke alarm?","the battery was dead."
|
| "the battery was dead.","a good battery would have saved his life."
|
| "a good battery would have saved his life.","he had cigarettes, but no battery."
|
| "he had cigarettes, but no battery.","it happens all the time."
|
| "they say he has started fifteen big fires.","he's been in jail three times already. |
| he's been in jail three times already.","why did they ever let him out?"
|
| "why did they ever let him out?","it's the law. they can't keep him in jail forever."
|
| "it's the law. they can't keep him in jail forever.","why not? everyone knows he's a firebug. he loves to start fires. |
| why not? everyone knows he's a firebug. he loves to start fires.","i don't know. sometimes the law doesn't make sense."
|
| "i don't know. sometimes the law doesn't make sense.","but his latest fire killed someone."
|
| "but his latest fire killed someone.","this time they have charged him with murder."
|
| "this time they have charged him with murder.","so maybe he'll go to jail forever? |
| so maybe he'll go to jail forever?","i sure hope so."
|
| "i sure hope so.","someone should set him on fire."
|
| "someone should set him on fire.","that would teach him a good lesson."
|
| "put your seatbelt on.","why?"
|
| "why?","because it will protect you in case of an accident."
|
| "because it will protect you in case of an accident.","but it's uncomfortable. |
| but it's uncomfortable.","it's the law. |
| it's the law.","it's so much trouble. |
| it's so much trouble.","it's common sense. |
| it's common sense.","it's so tight that it's hard for me to breathe."
|
| "it's so tight that it's hard for me to breathe.","hold your breath till we get there."
|
| "hold your breath till we get there.","okay, my seatbelt is on."
|
| "okay, my seatbelt is on.","i'm glad you don't complain very much."
|
| "i'm glad you don't complain very much.","i'm ready for an accident. |
| what are you doing?i'm going to change the light bulb. it burnt out."
|
| "i'm going to change the light bulb. it burnt out.what are you standing on? |
| what are you standing on?a couple of dictionaries and some textbooks. |
| a couple of dictionaries and some textbooks.are you crazy? |
| are you crazy?what's the matter?"
|
| "what's the matter?those books will slip and you'll fall."
|
| "those books will slip and you'll fall.it's only a couple of feet."
|
| "it's only a couple of feet.what if you fall while you're holding the light bulb, and it breaks and pieces go into your eyes?"
|
| "what if you fall while you're holding the light bulb, and it breaks and pieces go into your eyes?i never thought about that. |
| i never thought about that.you'd be blind for the rest of your life!"
|
| "you'd be blind for the rest of your life!i'll get the stepladder."
|
| "did you see that puddle of water on the floor?","yes. i called for a clean-up."
|
| "yes. i called for a clean-up.","a puddle of water is very dangerous."
|
| "a puddle of water is very dangerous.","it isn't easy to see. |
| it isn't easy to see.","but it's real easy to slip on. |
| but it's real easy to slip on.","especially on these slick floors."
|
| "especially on these slick floors.","someone who slips could hurt their back."
|
| "someone who slips could hurt their back.","they could even crack their head open."
|
| "they could even crack their head open.","we should stand here till the clean-up person gets here."
|
| "we should stand here till the clean-up person gets here.","we can leave if we put an orange cone here."
|
| "we can leave if we put an orange cone here.","yes, but i don't know where the orange cones are. |
| yes, but i don't know where the orange cones are."," it doesn't matter. here he comes now with the mop. |
| what happens when the fire alarm rings?we tell our students to leave the classroom. |
| we tell our students to leave the classroom.can they take their belongings? |
| can they take their belongings?yes, if they do it quickly. |
| yes, if they do it quickly.where do the students go? |
| where do the students go?they go out to the north parking lot. |
| they go out to the north parking lot.what do the teachers do? |
| what do the teachers do?we take our rosters to the parking lot and take roll. |
| we take our rosters to the parking lot and take roll.why do you do that? |
| why do you do that?we want to make sure all the students are out of the building. |
| we want to make sure all the students are out of the building.if they are all outside, then what? |
| if they are all outside, then what?then we just wait outside for a fireman to tell us to go back in. |
| i have to go back upstairs.why? we're already late."
|
| "why? we're already late.i have to check the stove. |
| i have to check the stove.what's the matter?"
|
| "what's the matter?maybe i left the burner on. |
| maybe i left the burner on.no, you didn't. i checked the stove before we left."
|
| "no, you didn't. i checked the stove before we left.are you sure? |
| are you sure?of course i'm sure."
|
| "of course i'm sure.well, i have to go back upstairs anyway. |
| well, i have to go back upstairs anyway.it's getting later every minute."
|
| "it's getting later every minute.i think i left the water running. |
| i think i left the water running.no, you didn't. let's go! the only thing running is the clock! |
| the city is buying guns.what are they paying? |
| what are they paying?up to $200 for each gun, no questions asked. |
| up to $200 for each gun, no questions asked.why are they doing this? |
| why are they doing this?they want to get guns off the street. |
| they want to get guns off the street.who would turn in a gun for $200? |
| who would turn in a gun for $200?that isn't a good deal?"
|
| "that isn't a good deal?a good gun costs $400 or more. |
| a good gun costs $400 or more.well, if you bring your receipt, maybe they'll give you $400."
|
| "well, if you bring your receipt, maybe they'll give you $400.i'll keep my receipt and my gun."
|
| "i'll keep my receipt and my gun.i didn't know you had a gun."
|
| "i didn't know you had a gun.everyone in america should have a gun. |
| you're yawning.","i sure am."
|
| "i sure am.","you should go to bed."
|
| "you should go to bed.","i will as soon as i finish this article."
|
| "i will as soon as i finish this article.","what are you reading?"
|
| "what are you reading?","it's about crime in los angeles. |
| it's about crime in los angeles.","what does it say?"
|
| "what does it say?","the mayor says the crime rate is going down."
|
| "the mayor says the crime rate is going down.","then why does everyone lock their doors?"
|
| "then why does everyone lock their doors?","i guess they haven't read this article. |
| i guess they haven't read this article.","no one believes that the crime rate is going down."
|
| "no one believes that the crime rate is going down.","maybe the mayor is just talking about his own neighborhood."
|
| "people who live in california are crazy.","why is that?"
|
| "why is that?","because of all the earthquakes and fires."
|
| "because of all the earthquakes and fires.","but big earthquakes happen only once in a while."
|
| "but big earthquakes happen only once in a while.","once in a while is once too many."
|
| "once in a while is once too many.","but you're right. there are a lot of fires. |
| but you're right. there are a lot of fires.","a recent fire destroyed 85 homes."
|
| "a recent fire destroyed 85 homes.","still, it's safer than florida. |
| still, it's safer than florida.","florida doesn't have earthquakes or fires. |
| florida doesn't have earthquakes or fires.","no, florida just has hurricanes every year from june to october."
|
| "no, florida just has hurricanes every year from june to october.","but most of those hurricanes are harmless."
|
| "but most of those hurricanes are harmless.","excuse me. hurricane andrew destroyed 30,000 homes!"
|
| "i went to hawaii on vacation.","did you like it?"
|
| "did you like it?","i loved it. i want to live there."
|
| "i loved it. i want to live there.","what did you like?"
|
| "what did you like?","the island is so green, and the water is so blue."
|
| "the island is so green, and the water is so blue.","did you go swimming?"
|
| "did you go swimming?","i went to the beach every day."
|
| "i went to the beach every day.","how was the weather?"
|
| "how was the weather?","it was hot and sunny every day."
|
| "it was hot and sunny every day.","what did you do at night?"
|
| "what did you do at night?","at night i went out to eat. the food was delicious."
|
| "at night i went out to eat. the food was delicious.","people who live in hawaii are lucky."
|
| "i like this hotel.","what do you like about it?"
|
| "what do you like about it?","we get a free breakfast."
|
| "we get a free breakfast.","coffee and a roll?"
|
| "coffee and a roll?","no, a real breakfast."
|
| "no, a real breakfast.","bacon and eggs?"
|
| "bacon and eggs?","with toast, ham, sausage, fresh fruit, and juice."
|
| "with toast, ham, sausage, fresh fruit, and juice.","wow! that is nice. let's stay for two nights. |
| wow! that is nice. let's stay for two nights.","and the rooms are clean, too."
|
| "and the rooms are clean, too.","do they allow pets?"
|
| "do they allow pets?","no pets, no smoking."
|
| "no pets, no smoking.","i like that. let's stay three nights. |
| i'm not sleeping here tonight.","what's the matter? this is a nice room. |
| what's the matter? this is a nice room.","maybe the room is nice, but not the bed."
|
| "maybe the room is nice, but not the bed.","what's wrong with the bed? |
| what's wrong with the bed?","look at this sheet."
|
| "look at this sheet.","yes?"
|
| "yes?","see those stains?"
|
| "see those stains?","i sure do."
|
| "i sure do.","i'm not sleeping on that sheet. |
| i'm not sleeping on that sheet.","well, just call the front desk. they'll give us new sheets. |
| well, just call the front desk. they'll give us new sheets.","i want sheets without stains on them."
|
| "i want sheets without stains on them.","from now on, let's bring our own sheets. |
| what time does your plane leave?it leaves at 12:15. |
| it leaves at 12:15.when do you have to be at the airport? |
| when do you have to be at the airport?i have to be there two hours early. |
| i have to be there two hours early.so we have to be at the airport at 10:15. |
| so we have to be at the airport at 10:15.that means we have to leave the house at 9:15. |
| that means we have to leave the house at 9:15.well, it's an hour to get there, if there are no traffic problems."
|
| "well, it's an hour to get there, if there are no traffic problems.so maybe we better leave at 8:15? |
| so maybe we better leave at 8:15?yes, it's better to get there too early than too late."
|
| "yes, it's better to get there too early than too late.i agree. |
| i agree.you never know what might happen on these freeways. |
| you never know what might happen on these freeways.there's at least one huge accident every day."
|
| "i need to fly to new york.","when are you going?"
|
| "when are you going?","during the christmas holidays."
|
| "during the christmas holidays.","you'd better buy your ticket now. |
| you'd better buy your ticket now.","you must be kidding."
|
| "you must be kidding.","no, i'm not. it's march. time is running out. seats are selling out right now."
|
| "no, i'm not. it's march. time is running out. seats are selling out right now.","i thought i would wait until october."
|
| "i thought i would wait until october.","i'll bet this is the first time you've ever flown during christmas."
|
| "i'll bet this is the first time you've ever flown during christmas.","you're right. |
| you're right.","well, listen to me. you need to buy a ticket now."
|
| "well, listen to me. you need to buy a ticket now.","but maybe prices will be cheaper in october."
|
| "but maybe prices will be cheaper in october.","cheaper prices won't do you any good if there are no seats. |
| i hate flying.so do i. |
| so do i.a long time ago, flying used to be okay. |
| a long time ago, flying used to be okay.now it's like riding a bus."
|
| "now it's like riding a bus.you're jammed in with people all around you."
|
| "you're jammed in with people all around you.half of them are coughing, and the other half are sneezing. |
| half of them are coughing, and the other half are sneezing.you don't have any elbow room or knee room."
|
| "you don't have any elbow room or knee room.people are always getting up to use the bathroom. |
| people are always getting up to use the bathroom.kids are crying or climbing over you. |
| kids are crying or climbing over you.it's a flying zoo!"
|
| "it's a flying zoo!i wish i could afford first class seats. |
| i wish i could afford first class seats.doesn't everybody?"
|
| "some guy rowed across the atlantic ocean.","good for him."
|
| "good for him.","why would he do that?"
|
| "why would he do that?","did he set a new record?"
|
| "did he set a new record?","yes, i think he did."
|
| "yes, i think he did.","well, i guess that's why he did it. |
| well, i guess that's why he did it.","what's the point? |
| what's the point?","now he has the world record!"
|
| "now he has the world record!","but someone's going to break it, so what good is it? |
| but someone's going to break it, so what good is it?","well, he can enjoy it while it lasts."
|
| "well, he can enjoy it while it lasts.","i don't think he even got paid for it. |
| i don't think he even got paid for it.","some people do it just to do it."
|
| "i want to go on a cruise ship.","that sounds like fun. where do you want to go?"
|
| "that sounds like fun. where do you want to go?","i want to cruise to hawaii."
|
| "i want to cruise to hawaii.","that should be a nice trip. lots of fun, and lots of food."
|
| "that should be a nice trip. lots of fun, and lots of food.","i have no idea how much it will cost."
|
| "i have no idea how much it will cost.","i think it depends on the season and on your cabin."
|
| "i think it depends on the season and on your cabin.","well, of course i want to go when the weather is nice."
|
| "well, of course i want to go when the weather is nice.","yes, you don't want to travel in winter storms. |
| yes, you don't want to travel in winter storms.","and i want to get a big cabin with a view."
|
| "and i want to get a big cabin with a view.","are you going to travel alone?"
|
| "are you going to travel alone?","no, my sister and i will travel together."
|
| "no, my sister and i will travel together.","well, you should go online and try to find a good deal."
|
| "i hate to fly.","because of all the security?"
|
| "because of all the security?","no, because it hurts my ears."
|
| "no, because it hurts my ears.","what do you mean?"
|
| "what do you mean?","every time we land or take off, my ears hurt so much."
|
| "every time we land or take off, my ears hurt so much.","that's just the altitude change, i think. |
| that's just the altitude change, i think.","whatever it is, it hurts."
|
| "whatever it is, it hurts.","can't you take medicine or something for it? |
| can't you take medicine or something for it?","i've tried everything, but nothing works. |
| i've tried everything, but nothing works.","have you tried earplugs?"
|
| "have you tried earplugs?","they don't work, either. |
| they don't work, either.","well, be glad you're not a pilot. |
| spring break starts tomorrow.are you going to go anywhere? |
| are you going to go anywhere?i was thinking of driving to arizona. |
| i was thinking of driving to arizona.to the grand canyon? |
| to the grand canyon?yes. i've never been there."
|
| "yes. i've never been there.i was there when i was a kid. |
| i was there when i was a kid.how did you like it? |
| how did you like it?i loved it. i still remember how amazing it was. |
| i loved it. i still remember how amazing it was.i'm sure i'll like it, too. |
| i'm sure i'll like it, too.you should try riding a mule on a trail to the bottom. |
| you should try riding a mule on a trail to the bottom.no way! i don't want to fall to my death."
|
| "no way! i don't want to fall to my death.don't worry. only one person has ever fallen off a mule."
|
| "that hotel was terrible.","the worst in the whole world."
|
| "the worst in the whole world.","the walls were so thin."
|
| "the walls were so thin.","all day long we heard tvs or telephones."
|
| "all day long we heard tvs or telephones.","all night long we heard people snoring."
|
| "all night long we heard people snoring.","housekeeping didn't give us fresh towels. |
| housekeeping didn't give us fresh towels.","room service brought us a cold dinner."
|
| "room service brought us a cold dinner.","our nonsmoking room stunk of cigarette smoke."
|
| "our nonsmoking room stunk of cigarette smoke.","our room was right next to the elevator and the ice machine."
|
| "our room was right next to the elevator and the ice machine.","they added phony charges to our bill."
|
| "they added phony charges to our bill.","how did we end up in that terrible hotel?"
|
| "how did we end up in that terrible hotel?","the travel agent gave us a 50-percent discount!"
|
| "i have to hang up. i'm so sleepy.it's not even 10 o'clock. |
| it's not even 10 o'clock.i'm falling asleep on the phone."
|
| "i'm falling asleep on the phone.you got up real early. |
| you got up real early.i had to take my friend to the airport. |
| i had to take my friend to the airport.why didn't you take a nap when you got home?"
|
| "why didn't you take a nap when you got home?i didn't get home until 30 minutes ago."
|
| "i didn't get home until 30 minutes ago.why is that? |
| why is that?there was a bomb threat at the airport. |
| there was a bomb threat at the airport.only a threat? |
| only a threat?yes, but i was stuck there all day while they looked for the bomb. |
| yes, but i was stuck there all day while they looked for the bomb.someday the bomb is going to be for real. |
| my dad went to washington, d.c.why did he do that? |
| why did he do that?he was invited, along with about 90 other veterans. |
| he was invited, along with about 90 other veterans.who invited them? |
| who invited them?some private organization. |
| some private organization.why did they invite him? |
| why did they invite him?to thank him and all the other soldiers who served in world war ii. |
| to thank him and all the other soldiers who served in world war ii.that's very nice."
|
| "that's very nice.my dad got to see the beautiful new world war ii monument. |
| my dad got to see the beautiful new world war ii monument.that trip must have cost a lot of money. |
| that trip must have cost a lot of money. he said all the money came from private donations. |
| that was a great trip to washington, d.c.tell me about it, dad. |
| tell me about it, dad.about 90 of us world war ii veterans got on the plane at 8 a.m. |
| about 90 of us world war ii veterans got on the plane at 8 a.m.how long was the flight? |
| how long was the flight?it only took about two hours. |
| it only took about two hours.did you take pictures at the world war ii monument? |
| did you take pictures at the world war ii monument?oh, yes. we all took lots of pictures. |
| oh, yes. we all took lots of pictures.then you flew back home that evening? |
| then you flew back home that evening?yes. when we landed, tv reporters and the army band were there. |
| yes. when we landed, tv reporters and the army band were there.that must have made you feel really special. |
| that must have made you feel really special.oh, it did. there were about 300 people there to honor us. |
| oh, it did. there were about 300 people there to honor us.well, you all deserve it. you helped save our country. |
| i need a job.i thought you had a job. |
| i thought you had a job.i did. |
| i did.what happened? |
| what happened?i got laid off. |
| i got laid off.that's terrible! when did it happen?"
|
| "that's terrible! when did it happen?i got laid off last week. |
| i got laid off last week.just you? |
| just you?no, ten of my coworkers got laid off, too. |
| no, ten of my coworkers got laid off, too.what are you going to do? |
| what are you going to do?i'm looking in the newspaper for a job."
|
| "i'm looking in the newspaper for a job.good luck! |
| before you go to that interview, check yourself.what's to check?"
|
| "what's to check?are your nails clean? |
| are your nails clean?yes, they are. |
| yes, they are.did you double-check your nose and teeth? |
| did you double-check your nose and teeth?they are clean, too. |
| they are clean, too.did you shine your shoes? |
| did you shine your shoes?my shoes are shined. |
| my shoes are shined.do your socks match? |
| do your socks match?of course they match. |
| of course they match.no, they don't. one is black and one is dark blue."
|
| "no, they don't. one is black and one is dark blue.yikes! thank you. |
| life is hard.it sure is. |
| it sure is.i thought school was hard. |
| i thought school was hard.me, too. i couldn't wait to graduate."
|
| "me, too. i couldn't wait to graduate.but now work is hard, too. |
| but now work is hard, too.i agree. work is just as hard as school. |
| i agree. work is just as hard as school.sometimes i wish i was back in school. |
| sometimes i wish i was back in school.me, too. school was fun. |
| me, too. school was fun.and it was only 12 years. |
| and it was only 12 years.it went by pretty fast. |
| it went by pretty fast.but work goes on forever! |
| but work goes on forever!we have to work for 30 years! |
| i'm sleepy.","so am i."
|
| "so am i.","i had a long day."
|
| "i had a long day.","so did i."
|
| "so did i.","i didn't even have lunch. |
| i didn't even have lunch.","neither did i."
|
| "neither did i.","i was busy the whole day."
|
| "i was busy the whole day.","so was i."
|
| "so was i.","i had to bring work home with me."
|
| "i had to bring work home with me.","i did too."
|
| "i did too.","your day was just like mine."
|
| "your day was just like mine.","of course it was. we work together!"
|
| "i don't like my job.what do you do? |
| what do you do?i'm a babysitter."
|
| "i'm a babysitter.is that a lot of work? |
| is that a lot of work?babies cry all the time. |
| babies cry all the time.you have to change their diapers. |
| you have to change their diapers.i have to feed them. |
| i have to feed them.are you looking for another job? |
| are you looking for another job?no, i'm looking for another family."
|
| "no, i'm looking for another family.another family? |
| another family?a family with only one baby. |
| a family with only one baby.that's a good idea."
|
| "i need a job.","what was your last job?"
|
| "what was your last job?","i was a painter."
|
| "i was a painter.","what happened?"
|
| "what happened?","i got laid off because there was no work."
|
| "i got laid off because there was no work.","what else can you do?"
|
| "what else can you do?","i'm a handyman. |
| i'm a handyman.","can you fix a dripping faucet in a kitchen sink?"
|
| "can you fix a dripping faucet in a kitchen sink?","of course."
|
| "of course.","then i have a job for you in my kitchen."
|
| "then i have a job for you in my kitchen.","it will cost you only $20 plus parts."
|
| "it will cost you only $20 plus parts.","okay. that sounds like a fair price."
|
| "what would you do if you lost your job?","i have no idea. i've been here for 20 years. |
| i have no idea. i've been here for 20 years.","do you have any other skills?"
|
| "do you have any other skills?","well, i know how to flip hamburgers."
|
| "well, i know how to flip hamburgers.","no one would hire you to flip hamburgers."
|
| "no one would hire you to flip hamburgers.","have you heard something that you're not telling me? |
| have you heard something that you're not telling me?","what do you mean?"
|
| "what do you mean?","are there going to be layoffs at this place?"
|
| "are there going to be layoffs at this place?","i certainly hope not!"
|
| "i certainly hope not!","if you got laid off, you'd be flipping hamburgers, too. |
| if you got laid off, you'd be flipping hamburgers, too.","oh great, we could both work at burger king."
|
| "oh great, we could both work at burger king.","maybe we'd get laid off there, too. |
| do your students ever talk about their jobs?yes, and they ask me what jobs are the best. |
| yes, and they ask me what jobs are the best.i tell my students to become a teacher. |
| i tell my students to become a teacher.teaching is a great job. |
| teaching is a great job.it's the best job i've ever had. |
| it's the best job i've ever had.what makes it so good? |
| what makes it so good?for me, it's the students."
|
| "for me, it's the students.what do you mean? |
| what do you mean?i mean i have wonderful students. |
| i mean i have wonderful students.that must be nice. |
| that must be nice.teaching is the best part of my whole day. |
| teaching is the best part of my whole day.you're a lucky man to have a job you love."
|
| "boy, i'm glad that job is finished.how long did it take? |
| how long did it take?four hours, without a break. |
| four hours, without a break.it's always nice to finish a job."
|
| "it's always nice to finish a job.well, it's good and bad."
|
| "well, it's good and bad.what's bad about it?"
|
| "what's bad about it?when you finish, all you do is start another job! |
| when you finish, all you do is start another job!yes, that's right. it does get boring."
|
| "yes, that's right. it does get boring.especially if it's the same work, over and over."
|
| "especially if it's the same work, over and over.but that's what most people do."
|
| "but that's what most people do.yes, i guess most of us are stuck in a routine. |
| yes, i guess most of us are stuck in a routine.i wonder if there is any job that you don't repeat over and over."
|
| "i think i have the worst boss in the world.","what makes him so bad?"
|
| "what makes him so bad?","he's rude and he yells a lot. |
| he's rude and he yells a lot.","that's hard to take. |
| that's hard to take.","i've never heard him say please or thank you. |
| i've never heard him say please or thank you.","he sounds like a real jerk."
|
| "he sounds like a real jerk.","no one at work likes him."
|
| "no one at work likes him.","can't you report him to his supervisor? |
| can't you report him to his supervisor?","of course not. if i do that, i'll lose my job. |
| of course not. if i do that, i'll lose my job.","yes, they don't like troublemakers or complainers. |
| yes, they don't like troublemakers or complainers.","i can't quit, because i'm making a good salary."
|
| "i can't quit, because i'm making a good salary.","you shouldn't choose money over happiness. |
| what are we going to do?about what? |
| about what?about finding a job for me. |
| about finding a job for me.you don't need a job. i make enough money for both of us."
|
| "you don't need a job. i make enough money for both of us.that doesn't matter. i don't want to sit around. |
| that doesn't matter. i don't want to sit around.okay, what kind of job do you want? |
| okay, what kind of job do you want?i'm not sure."
|
| "i'm not sure.well, you should do something that you enjoy. |
| well, you should do something that you enjoy.i enjoy selling. i was born to sell. |
| i enjoy selling. i was born to sell.okay, what do you want to sell? |
| okay, what do you want to sell?cigarette lighters. i'll make a fortune."
|
| "cigarette lighters. i'll make a fortune.but you hate cigarettes and you hate smoking! |
| a new hotel is looking for workers.yes, i saw it on the tv news. |
| yes, i saw it on the tv news.they need 300 new workers. |
| they need 300 new workers.and 4,000 people showed up. |
| and 4,000 people showed up.so many people are out of work. |
| so many people are out of work.i still have my job, thank goodness. |
| i still have my job, thank goodness.so do i, but i'm worried."
|
| "so do i, but i'm worried.me too. there are no guarantees. |
| me too. there are no guarantees.if you lose your job, you can move in with me. |
| if you lose your job, you can move in with me.oh, thank you. that's very nice of you."
|
| "oh, thank you. that's very nice of you.you would do the same for me. |
| you would do the same for me.of course. what are friends for? |
| i think i did something real stupid.what did you do? |
| what did you do?i bought some stock. |
| i bought some stock.everybody buys stock. |
| everybody buys stock.i bought it on a hunch. |
| i bought it on a hunch.you didn't read about the company first?"
|
| "you didn't read about the company first?i didn't have to. it's been in business for 60 years. |
| i didn't have to. it's been in business for 60 years.so what's the problem?"
|
| "so what's the problem?i used all my savings on this one company. |
| i used all my savings on this one company.you put all your eggs into one basket. |
| you put all your eggs into one basket.if the company goes out of business, i'll have nothing."
|
| "if the company goes out of business, i'll have nothing.oh, you'll have somethingyou'll have a lesson you'll never forget!"
|
| "i was going to be a doctor.","what happened to your plans?"
|
| "what happened to your plans?","i got a d in college chemistry."
|
| "i got a d in college chemistry.","well, a d is better than an f."
|
| "well, a d is better than an f.","a tutor helped me get the d!"
|
| "a tutor helped me get the d!","so, you didn't become a doctor. |
| so, you didn't become a doctor.","and now i'm glad that i didn't."
|
| "and now i'm glad that i didn't.","why's that? |
| why's that?","a hospital is the most dangerous place in the world."
|
| "a hospital is the most dangerous place in the world.","oh, yes, because of all the killer germs."
|
| "oh, yes, because of all the killer germs.","if you're a smart doctor, you stay away from hospitals. |
| if you're a smart doctor, you stay away from hospitals.","yes, the smart doctors are those tv news doctorsno hospitals, no patients."
|
| "i want to be a mail carrier when i grow up.","why?"
|
| "why?","because you get to meet a lot of people."
|
| "because you get to meet a lot of people.","you sure do."
|
| "you sure do.","and you get a lot of exercise every day."
|
| "and you get a lot of exercise every day.","that's the truth. |
| that's the truth.","and you get to play with a lot of dogs."
|
| "and you get to play with a lot of dogs.","well, you're supposed to be working. |
| well, you're supposed to be working.","yes, but i will always pet the friendly dogs."
|
| "yes, but i will always pet the friendly dogs.","what about the unfriendly dogs?"
|
| "what about the unfriendly dogs?","i think if you are friendly to dogs, they are friendly to you."
|
| "i think if you are friendly to dogs, they are friendly to you.","dogs are like peoplenot all of them are friendly."
|
| "i want to move to new york.","to the state or the city?"
|
| "to the state or the city?","to the city, of course."
|
| "to the city, of course.","why do you want to move there?"
|
| "why do you want to move there?","because i want to make a lot of money."
|
| "because i want to make a lot of money.","there are a lot of poor people in new york."
|
| "there are a lot of poor people in new york.","there sure areat least a million."
|
| "there sure areat least a million.","so how do you plan to become rich?"
|
| "so how do you plan to become rich?","i will knock on the doors of all the corporations."
|
| "i will knock on the doors of all the corporations.","that won't make you rich. nobody will talk to you. |
| that won't make you rich. nobody will talk to you.","i will keep knocking on doors."
|
| "i will keep knocking on doors.","all you will get is sore knuckles."
|
| "i love salads.","me too."
|
| "me too.","i usually eat a simple salad."
|
| "i usually eat a simple salad.","what do you put in it?"
|
| "what do you put in it?","just lettuce, tomato, and celery."
|
| "just lettuce, tomato, and celery.","that's it? |
| that's it?","i add some pepper and salt."
|
| "i add some pepper and salt.","i always put cheese in my salads."
|
| "i always put cheese in my salads.","yes, cheese is nice."
|
| "yes, cheese is nice.","what kind of dressing do you use?"
|
| "what kind of dressing do you use?","i pour lots of french dressing on top."
|
| "i pour lots of french dressing on top.","me too. french dressing is so delicious! who cares about calories?"
|
| "i love cheese.","me too."
|
| "me too.","where does cheese come from?"
|
| "where does cheese come from?","it comes from cows."
|
| "it comes from cows.","so we get cheese from cows, and we get milk, too?"
|
| "so we get cheese from cows, and we get milk, too?","yes, we do."
|
| "yes, we do.","what else do we get from cows?"
|
| "what else do we get from cows?","we get hamburgers and steak."
|
| "we get hamburgers and steak.","oh, that's so delicious. |
| oh, that's so delicious.","we also get leather."
|
| "we also get leather.","we get a lot of things from cows, don't we? |
| we get a lot of things from cows, don't we?","yes. a cow is man's best friend. |
| i used to work in a deli.how did you like it? |
| how did you like it?i loved it! |
| i loved it!did you get free food? |
| did you get free food?i ate free cheese and meat every day. |
| i ate free cheese and meat every day.that sounds like a great job. |
| that sounds like a great job.whatever a customer ordered, i sliced off a little more for me. |
| whatever a customer ordered, i sliced off a little more for me.did you get fat? |
| did you get fat?no, but i did put on a few pounds. |
| no, but i did put on a few pounds.that sounds like a dream job. |
| that sounds like a dream job.it was, until one day my manager caught me. |
| it was, until one day my manager caught me.no more free cheese for you, huh? |
| i'm on a new diet.","what are you eating now?"
|
| "what are you eating now?","i switched from pasta to potatoes."
|
| "i switched from pasta to potatoes.","why did you do that?"
|
| "why did you do that?","pasta is processed food. potatoes are natural food."
|
| "pasta is processed food. potatoes are natural food.","natural food has more vitamins."
|
| "natural food has more vitamins.","and it's just as easy to prepare. |
| and it's just as easy to prepare.","how do you prepare the potatoes?"
|
| "how do you prepare the potatoes?","i wash them, and then steam them for 15 minutes."
|
| "i wash them, and then steam them for 15 minutes.","that's pretty simple. |
| that's pretty simple.","then i add butter, salt, and pepper."
|
| "then i add butter, salt, and pepper.","can i have all those cans of tomato sauce you bought for your pasta?"
|
| "my girlfriend's mom got mad at me at the dinner table.why was that? |
| why was that?i sprinkled salt and pepper on the food before i tasted it. |
| i sprinkled salt and pepper on the food before i tasted it.what's the matter with that?"
|
| "what's the matter with that?her mom is a great cook. |
| her mom is a great cook.so, a little salt and pepper never hurt anything. |
| so, a little salt and pepper never hurt anything.it hurt her feelings. |
| it hurt her feelings.oh. |
| oh.i apologized to her, but i could tell she was still upset. |
| i apologized to her, but i could tell she was still upset.maybe you shouldn't eat there again."
|
| "maybe you shouldn't eat there again.i'm sure everything will be okay in a day or two."
|
| "i'm sure everything will be okay in a day or two.it's your girlfriend's fault. she should have warned you. |
| i eat the same thing every day.you're kidding."
|
| "you're kidding.no, i'm serious."
|
| "no, i'm serious.doesn't that get old?"
|
| "doesn't that get old?no, because i'm eating food that i like."
|
| "no, because i'm eating food that i like.but the same thing day after day gets old. |
| but the same thing day after day gets old.well, i guess if it ever does get old, i'll change to something different."
|
| "well, i guess if it ever does get old, i'll change to something different.do you eat fruits and vegetables every day? |
| do you eat fruits and vegetables every day?no, i hate vegetables. |
| no, i hate vegetables.but you eat fruits. |
| but you eat fruits.i eat two apples, one banana, and one orange every day. |
| i eat two apples, one banana, and one orange every day.well, there's nothing wrong with that."
|
| "there's something wrong with my orange.what's wrong?"
|
| "what's wrong?it's not orange!"
|
| "it's not orange!your orange isn't orange?"
|
| "your orange isn't orange?no, it's dark pink!"
|
| "no, it's dark pink!are you sure? i never heard of such a thing. |
| are you sure? i never heard of such a thing.i just peeled it, and i'm looking at it right now."
|
| "i just peeled it, and i'm looking at it right now.let me see. yes, you're right. your orange is pink."
|
| "let me see. yes, you're right. your orange is pink.who ever heard of such a thing? |
| who ever heard of such a thing?oh, look. here's the little sticker that was on it. it's called a pink navel. |
| oh, look. here's the little sticker that was on it. it's called a pink navel.what is this world coming to? |
| what is this world coming to?who knows? maybe soon we'll have pink bananas."
|
| "i love peanuts.","me, too. i love them roasted and salted."
|
| "me, too. i love them roasted and salted.","i love boiled peanuts."
|
| "i love boiled peanuts.","boiled? i never heard of that."
|
| "boiled? i never heard of that.","just boil raw peanuts in salt water until the shells are soft."
|
| "just boil raw peanuts in salt water until the shells are soft.","i'll have to try them sometime. |
| i'll have to try them sometime.","they're best when they're hot."
|
| "they're best when they're hot.","my brother is allergic to peanuts."
|
| "my brother is allergic to peanuts.","that's not good. |
| that's not good.","no, it isn't. he almost died when he was little. |
| no, it isn't. he almost died when he was little.","i guess he has to be very careful about what he eats."
|
| "i guess he has to be very careful about what he eats.","he has a very strict diet."
|
| "i'm gaining weight.how much have you gained? |
| how much have you gained?three pounds just this month. |
| three pounds just this month.do you know why? |
| do you know why?i think it's the ice cream."
|
| "i think it's the ice cream.you started eating ice cream? |
| you started eating ice cream?it was on sale. |
| it was on sale.how much did you buy? |
| how much did you buy?i filled up my freezer with ice cream. |
| i filled up my freezer with ice cream.well, it won't last forever."
|
| "well, it won't last forever.no, i figure i'll finish it all by next week."
|
| "no, i figure i'll finish it all by next week.then you can start losing weight, if there isn't another sale."
|
| "i'm stuffed.of course you are. you ate everything on the table. |
| of course you are. you ate everything on the table.i don't like to eat leftovers."
|
| "i don't like to eat leftovers.i'm glad to hear there's something you don't like to eat."
|
| "i'm glad to hear there's something you don't like to eat.i like my food hot and fresh. |
| i like my food hot and fresh.you like to see it disappear. |
| you like to see it disappear.i don't like it reheated."
|
| "i don't like it reheated.well, you'll have hot fresh food tomorrow night."
|
| "well, you'll have hot fresh food tomorrow night.i'm so full i'm going to burst. |
| i'm so full i'm going to burst.you should loosen your belt. |
| you should loosen your belt.i already loosened my belt and unbuttoned my pants. |
| i already loosened my belt and unbuttoned my pants.well, don't stand up, please."
|
| "i saw what you did.","i didn't do anything. |
| i didn't do anything.","oh yes, you did."
|
| "oh yes, you did.","what are you talking about?"
|
| "what are you talking about?","you know what i'm talking about. |
| you know what i'm talking about.","i don't have any idea. |
| i don't have any idea.","you know what you did."
|
| "you know what you did.","maybe i know, but how could you know?"
|
| "maybe i know, but how could you know?","because i was watching you."
|
| "because i was watching you.","okay, i'm sorry i did it. |
| okay, i'm sorry i did it.","don't drink milk out of the carton. use a glass! |
| don't drink milk out of the carton. use a glass!","i promise i'll never drink out of the carton again. |
| i like that shirt.so do i. |
| so do i.how much is it? |
| how much is it?i don't know. the tag is missing."
|
| "i don't know. the tag is missing.ask the clerk. |
| ask the clerk.i will. |
| i will.oh, look. here's another shirt just like it."
|
| "oh, look. here's another shirt just like it.does it have a price tag? |
| does it have a price tag?yes, it does. it's only $20."
|
| "yes, it does. it's only $20.that's a great price."
|
| "that's a great price.i think i'll buy both of them."
|
| "i think i'll buy both of them.you'd better try them on first."
|
| "i bought you a pair of pants.","thank you."
|
| "thank you.","i hope they fit."
|
| "i hope they fit.","i hope you kept the receipt."
|
| "i hope you kept the receipt.","you think they won't fit? |
| you think they won't fit?","i think i've put on some weight. |
| i think i've put on some weight.","you think?"
|
| "you think?","maybe a pound or two."
|
| "maybe a pound or two.","maybe four or five pounds?"
|
| "maybe four or five pounds?","my waist is bigger than it was."
|
| "my waist is bigger than it was.","no problem. these pants have an elastic waistband."
|
| "no problem. these pants have an elastic waistband.","you are so smart!"
|
| "what do we need to buy?","let me look at our list."
|
| "let me look at our list.","i know that we need milk."
|
| "i know that we need milk.","nonfat."
|
| "nonfat.","of course. what else?"
|
| "of course. what else?","we need cheese, bread, and ham."
|
| "we need cheese, bread, and ham.","what kind of cheese?"
|
| "what kind of cheese?","swiss."
|
| "swiss.","of course, the cheese with holes in it."
|
| "of course, the cheese with holes in it.","i never used to buy swiss cheese."
|
| "i never used to buy swiss cheese.","why not?"
|
| "why not?","i didn't want to pay for the holes. |
| i need some pants.i thought you just bought a pair. |
| i thought you just bought a pair.i did. |
| i did.what's wrong with them so soon?"
|
| "what's wrong with them so soon?the pants are fine, but the pocket has a huge hole in it. |
| the pants are fine, but the pocket has a huge hole in it.you shouldn't carry your keys and pens in your pocket."
|
| "you shouldn't carry your keys and pens in your pocket.but that's what pockets are for."
|
| "but that's what pockets are for.you should carry them in a purse. |
| you should carry them in a purse.i'm a man, and men don't carry purses! |
| i'm a man, and men don't carry purses!well, you should buy pants with stronger pockets. |
| well, you should buy pants with stronger pockets.i would if i could find someone who makes strong pockets. |
| i would if i could find someone who makes strong pockets.try a google search online. |
| what are those wipes for?you use them to wipe the handle of the shopping cart. |
| you use them to wipe the handle of the shopping cart.that's a great idea."
|
| "that's a great idea.yes, all the markets just started offering wipes to shoppers. |
| yes, all the markets just started offering wipes to shoppers.i'm going to take five wipes."
|
| "i'm going to take five wipes.what do you need five of them for? |
| what do you need five of them for?one to wipe the handle, and the others to wipe the produce. |
| one to wipe the handle, and the others to wipe the produce.what's the matter with the produce?"
|
| "what's the matter with the produce?do you think the bananas fell from the sky? |
| do you think the bananas fell from the sky?what do you mean? |
| what do you mean?i mean, someone used their dirty hands to pick the bananas, the apples, and the oranges. |
| i mean, someone used their dirty hands to pick the bananas, the apples, and the oranges.well, you better save a wipe for the dirty dollar bills you're going to pay with."
|
| "did you go to the 99 cents store?","yes, i did."
|
| "yes, i did.","what did you buy?"
|
| "what did you buy?","well, i got a lot of good deals, as usual."
|
| "well, i got a lot of good deals, as usual.","like what?"
|
| "like what?","well, a dozen large eggs were only 99 cents."
|
| "well, a dozen large eggs were only 99 cents.","that's a good deal. |
| that's a good deal.","and a one-pound tub of soft butter was the same price."
|
| "and a one-pound tub of soft butter was the same price.","another good deal."
|
| "another good deal.","but the best deal was five pounds of potatoes for 99 cents."
|
| "but the best deal was five pounds of potatoes for 99 cents.","i don't know how that store makes money. |
| i don't know how that store makes money.","neither do i, but they're doing something right. |
| i need a new computer.what's the matter with yours?"
|
| "what's the matter with yours?it's six years old."
|
| "it's six years old.that's pretty old."
|
| "that's pretty old.it still works, but i'm going to give it to a charity."
|
| "it still works, but i'm going to give it to a charity.are you going to buy a desktop or laptop? |
| are you going to buy a desktop or laptop?oh, a laptop, of course. |
| oh, a laptop, of course.a pc or a mac? |
| a pc or a mac?i haven't decided yet."
|
| "i haven't decided yet.more and more people are using macs. |
| more and more people are using macs.but 90 percent of the world uses pcs. |
| but 90 percent of the world uses pcs.and that's not going to change anytime soon."
|
| "i got ripped off.","what happened?"
|
| "what happened?","i had a car problem, so i went online."
|
| "i had a car problem, so i went online.","did you find a solution?"
|
| "did you find a solution?","yes, i did. a site i went to said they would send me the solution."
|
| "yes, i did. a site i went to said they would send me the solution.","so, what's the problem? |
| so, what's the problem?","i sent them $20 using my credit card, but they never sent me the solution."
|
| "i sent them $20 using my credit card, but they never sent me the solution.","what are you going to do?"
|
| "what are you going to do?","i sent them an email asking for my money back."
|
| "i sent them an email asking for my money back.","have you heard from them?"
|
| "have you heard from them?","not yet. it's been a week. |
| not yet. it's been a week.","well, i guess that's a $20 lesson for you. |
| where's the pencil sharpener?","which one?"
|
| "which one?","any one. i need to sharpen this pencil."
|
| "any one. i need to sharpen this pencil.","i think there's one on the dining room table. |
| i think there's one on the dining room table.","i already looked there."
|
| "i already looked there.","did you look in the desk drawer?"
|
| "did you look in the desk drawer?","yes, i looked there, too."
|
| "yes, i looked there, too.","don't we have about five sharpeners? |
| don't we have about five sharpeners?","yes, but they seem to have legs."
|
| "yes, but they seem to have legs.","tomorrow i'm going to buy an electric sharpener. |
| tomorrow i'm going to buy an electric sharpener.","get one with the rubber suction cups on the bottom."
|
| "get one with the rubber suction cups on the bottom.","yes. that way it will stay where i put it."
|
| "i'm trying to stretch my dollars.how are you doing that? |
| how are you doing that?i started shopping at the dollar store. |
| i started shopping at the dollar store.that saves a lot of money. |
| that saves a lot of money.i bought three pounds of potatoes for a dollar. |
| i bought three pounds of potatoes for a dollar.that's a good deal."
|
| "that's a good deal.yes, even though some of the potatoes had eyes. |
| yes, even though some of the potatoes had eyes.just put them in the fridge. |
| just put them in the fridge.also, i bought a can of cheap coffee and a bag of good coffee. |
| also, i bought a can of cheap coffee and a bag of good coffee.why did you do that? |
| why did you do that?i mixed them together. |
| i mixed them together.if the coffee still tastes okay, that's a good idea."
|
| "i really like this house.","can we afford it?"
|
| "can we afford it?","they want 20 percent down."
|
| "they want 20 percent down.","that's a lot of money. |
| that's a lot of money.","but the house is so nice."
|
| "but the house is so nice.","it's in a great neighborhood. |
| it's in a great neighborhood.","it's close to the beach. |
| it's close to the beach.","it's close to the freeways. |
| it's close to the freeways.","it's got a big yard. |
| it's got a big yard.","the kids love the house, too."
|
| "the kids love the house, too.","if we don't buy it, someone else will. |
| if we don't buy it, someone else will.","you're right. let's buy it now. we can worry later."
|
| "we can't afford this house.are you sure? |
| are you sure?we will be house rich, but cash poor. |
| we will be house rich, but cash poor.what do you mean? |
| what do you mean?our monthly payments will be too high. |
| our monthly payments will be too high.we won't have any money for other things?"
|
| "we won't have any money for other things?no, we won't have money for gas or food."
|
| "no, we won't have money for gas or food.we'll be eating peanut butter sandwiches?"
|
| "we'll be eating peanut butter sandwiches?without the peanut butter! |
| without the peanut butter!that's no good!"
|
| "that's no good!we have to find a cheaper house. |
| we have to find a cheaper house.of course. we can't live without gas or peanut butter."
|
| "that is a beautiful house.","i don't like it. |
| i don't like it.","what's the matter with it? |
| what's the matter with it?","it's on the corner. |
| it's on the corner.","so?"
|
| "so?","that means it gets twice as much traffic."
|
| "that means it gets twice as much traffic.","you're right. |
| you're right.","when you're inside, you will always hear cars stopping and stopping at the intersection. |
| when you're inside, you will always hear cars stopping and stopping at the intersection.","or you'll hear the collision if someone doesn't stop."
|
| "or you'll hear the collision if someone doesn't stop.","or you'll see the collision if they crash into the house. |
| or you'll see the collision if they crash into the house.","let's find a house that's at the end of a dead end."
|
| "let's find a house that's at the end of a dead end.","that's perfect. the less traffic, the better. |
| i hate looking for an apartment.me, too. |
| me, too.we have a 2 o'clock appointment to see the one on main street."
|
| "we have a 2 o'clock appointment to see the one on main street.we'd better get ready to go."
|
| "we'd better get ready to go.it's an upstairs unit."
|
| "it's an upstairs unit.that's good, because i don't want to live under people with loud feet. |
| that's good, because i don't want to live under people with loud feet.and it's a corner unit."
|
| "and it's a corner unit.that's great. we won't have neighbors on both sides of us. |
| that's great. we won't have neighbors on both sides of us.no pets are allowed. |
| no pets are allowed.perfect. we don't have to listen to barking dogs."
|
| "perfect. we don't have to listen to barking dogs.and there are only six units in the whole building. |
| and there are only six units in the whole building.where's the checkbook? i'm ready to rent it without even seeing it. |
| did you call the manager?yes. he said he'd come over tomorrow."
|
| "yes. he said he'd come over tomorrow.did he say what time? |
| did he say what time?yes. he said he'd be here at 9 o'clock. |
| yes. he said he'd be here at 9 o'clock.did he understand what the problem is? |
| did he understand what the problem is?yes. i told him our doorbell doesn't work."
|
| "yes. i told him our doorbell doesn't work.it shouldn't take him long to fix it."
|
| "it shouldn't take him long to fix it.i don't even know why we need to fix it."
|
| "i don't even know why we need to fix it.in case we have visitors. |
| in case we have visitors.but they can just knock on the door. |
| but they can just knock on the door.actually, i want him to look at our carpet, too. |
| actually, i want him to look at our carpet, too.yes, it would be nice if he'd give us a new carpet."
|
| "do you like this house?","yes, it's beautiful. |
| yes, it's beautiful.","it's perfect for us and the kids. |
| it's perfect for us and the kids.","three bedrooms, three bathrooms, and a big back yard."
|
| "three bedrooms, three bathrooms, and a big back yard.","and we can afford it!"
|
| "and we can afford it!","so are we going to buy it?"
|
| "so are we going to buy it?","i'm afraid not. |
| i'm afraid not.","it's too far from your job, isn't it?"
|
| "it's too far from your job, isn't it?","i can't spend four hours on the road every day. |
| i can't spend four hours on the road every day.","by the time you get home, you'll be too tired to even eat. |
| by the time you get home, you'll be too tired to even eat.","i won't be able to play with the kids. |
| i won't be able to play with the kids.","no, we have to find something closer to your job."
|
| "boy, it's chilly outside, isn't it?","it sure is."
|
| "it sure is.","in fact, it's chilly in the apartment, too. |
| in fact, it's chilly in the apartment, too.","let's turn on the heat. |
| let's turn on the heat.","i'll check to make sure that all the windows are shut. |
| i'll check to make sure that all the windows are shut.","it should be warmer in a few minutes."
|
| "it should be warmer in a few minutes.","it's so nice to have a heated apartment. |
| it's so nice to have a heated apartment.","how did they survive in the old days?"
|
| "how did they survive in the old days?","they had fireplaces."
|
| "they had fireplaces.","someone had to chop the wood."
|
| "someone had to chop the wood.","and carry it into the house."
|
| "and carry it into the house.","all we have to do is flip a switch."
|
| "this is a nice neighborhood.","the streets are clean and quiet."
|
| "the streets are clean and quiet.","the neighbors don't party on the weekends. |
| the neighbors don't party on the weekends.","people take care of their lawns."
|
| "people take care of their lawns.","no rusty old cars are sitting in the front yards."
|
| "no rusty old cars are sitting in the front yards.","we never have to call the police about anything."
|
| "we never have to call the police about anything.","our kids are completely safe."
|
| "our kids are completely safe.","so why are we selling our house?"
|
| "so why are we selling our house?","they're building a 3-story apartment building on the corner. |
| they're building a 3-story apartment building on the corner.","so we've got to sell before property values go down? |
| so we've got to sell before property values go down?","yes. i still can't believe our city council allowed this building. |
| yes. i still can't believe our city council allowed this building.","they're probably getting something under the table. |
| that was a huge fire in santa barbara.yes, it was. |
| yes, it was.they said about 30 houses burned to the ground. |
| they said about 30 houses burned to the ground.and they were expensive houses. |
| and they were expensive houses.i feel so sorry for those people. |
| i feel so sorry for those people.why feel sorry for rich people? |
| why feel sorry for rich people?i feel sorry for anyone who loses their home. |
| i feel sorry for anyone who loses their home.so do i, but not if they're rich."
|
| "so do i, but not if they're rich.what does that have to do with it? |
| what does that have to do with it?rich people think they're better than us."
|
| "rich people think they're better than us.how many rich people do you know? |
| how many rich people do you know?none. |
| bears are invading our neighborhoods.of course they are. they're starving to death."
|
| "of course they are. they're starving to death.they should stay in the woods where they belong. |
| they should stay in the woods where they belong.there's no food in the woods."
|
| "there's no food in the woods.can't they eat grass?"
|
| "can't they eat grass?do you think a bear is a cow? |
| do you think a bear is a cow?well, i've seen them eating berries."
|
| "well, i've seen them eating berries.berries aren't in season all year round."
|
| "berries aren't in season all year round.it's too dangerous for kids and pets."
|
| "it's too dangerous for kids and pets.people need to cover their trash cans. |
| people need to cover their trash cans.the police need to shoot all the bears. |
| the police need to shoot all the bears.you don't solve a problem by shooting it."
|
| "who did you vote for?","i voted for obama."
|
| "i voted for obama.","me too."
|
| "me too.","he will be a great president."
|
| "he will be a great president.","everyone likes him."
|
| "everyone likes him.","he's a good speaker. |
| he's a good speaker.","and he's really smart. |
| and he's really smart.","he will solve our problems."
|
| "he will solve our problems.","he will end the war."
|
| "he will end the war.","the next four years will be good years."
|
| "the next four years will be good years.","i'll vote for him next time, too. |
| i'll vote for him next time, too.","i think everyone will."
|
| "the election is next week.","who are you voting for?"
|
| "who are you voting for?","i'm not voting for the mayor. |
| i'm not voting for the mayor.","why not?"
|
| "why not?","he made promises that he didn't keep. |
| he made promises that he didn't keep.","like what?"
|
| "like what?","he promised to hire 1,000 more police officers."
|
| "he promised to hire 1,000 more police officers.","how many did he hire?"
|
| "how many did he hire?","one hundred!"
|
| "one hundred!","maybe he had a good reason."
|
| "maybe he had a good reason.","maybe he's just a liar. |
| maybe he's just a liar.","maybe i'll vote for someone else, too. |
| i can't believe he won the election.","only 15 percent of the voters turned out."
|
| "only 15 percent of the voters turned out.","that is a joke."
|
| "that is a joke.","voting is so important, but people don't bother. |
| voting is so important, but people don't bother.","many people think their vote doesn't matter. |
| many people think their vote doesn't matter.","the mayor won by only 2,000 votes."
|
| "the mayor won by only 2,000 votes.","we're stuck with him for four more years. |
| we're stuck with him for four more years.","voting is so easy. you can even mail your ballot in."
|
| "voting is so easy. you can even mail your ballot in.","all you have to do is vote and put a stamp on it."
|
| "all you have to do is vote and put a stamp on it.","how easy is that?"
|
| "how easy is that?","i guess people just don't care. |
| i guess people just don't care.","they'll care when they see their taxes go up. |
| well, we have a new president.but we have the same old problems. |
| but we have the same old problems.well, he's made a few changes."
|
| "well, he's made a few changes.like what? |
| like what?i think he closed the bowling alley in the white house. |
| i think he closed the bowling alley in the white house.oh, yeah. he's changing it to a basketball court."
|
| "oh, yeah. he's changing it to a basketball court.who's paying for that?"
|
| "who's paying for that?i think we are! |
| i think we are!well, that's okay, as long as it helps him relax and think more clearly."
|
| "well, that's okay, as long as it helps him relax and think more clearly.yes, we need a relaxed president who thinks clearly. |
| yes, we need a relaxed president who thinks clearly.do any other world leaders have a basketball court? |
| do any other world leaders have a basketball court?they will. you know america always leads the way. |
| people say that everybody loves obama.well, more than 50 million people voted for mccain. |
| well, more than 50 million people voted for mccain.that's 50 million people who don't love obama. |
| that's 50 million people who don't love obama.obama's got four years to make everyone happy."
|
| "obama's got four years to make everyone happy.he's never going to make everyone happy."
|
| "he's never going to make everyone happy.can you imagine being president? |
| can you imagine being president?everyone wants you to solve their problems. |
| everyone wants you to solve their problems.i have enough stress from trying to solve my own problems. |
| i have enough stress from trying to solve my own problems.you and everybody else. |
| you and everybody else.i would never want to be president. |
| i would never want to be president.but think about all the power you'd have."
|
| "but think about all the power you'd have.i prefer my quiet little life to all the power in the world. |
| did you read this article?what article? |
| what article?it says the mayor spends only 11 percent of his time on city duties. |
| it says the mayor spends only 11 percent of his time on city duties.only 11 percent? |
| only 11 percent?about 50 percent of the time he's traveling."
|
| "about 50 percent of the time he's traveling.where does he travel to? |
| where does he travel to?oh, all over the world. |
| oh, all over the world.but he's supposed to be making our city a better place."
|
| "but he's supposed to be making our city a better place.he's visiting other cities to get ideas."
|
| "he's visiting other cities to get ideas.can't he just go online?"
|
| "can't he just go online?the rest of the time he's raising money for his reelection."
|
| "the rest of the time he's raising money for his reelection.well, he'll never get reelected once this news gets out."
|
| "who did you vote for for president?","i voted for ralph nader."
|
| "i voted for ralph nader.","who in the world is ralph nader?"
|
| "who in the world is ralph nader?","he's the best man for president. |
| he's the best man for president.","why's that? |
| why's that?","he hates corporations."
|
| "he hates corporations.","well, most corporations do think only about money."
|
| "well, most corporations do think only about money.","he hates democrats and republicans."
|
| "he hates democrats and republicans.","well, they do put their party before their country."
|
| "well, they do put their party before their country.","he's the only candidate that i trust. |
| he's the only candidate that i trust.","but he didn't have a chance. nobody voted for him! |
| but he didn't have a chance. nobody voted for him!","sooner or later, voters will wake up."
|
| "i don't know why i bother to vote.why's that?"
|
| "why's that?what good does it do? |
| what good does it do?you get to put someone in power that you like. |
| you get to put someone in power that you like.only if my candidate wins. |
| only if my candidate wins.well, he can't win unless you and others vote for him."
|
| "well, he can't win unless you and others vote for him.but even if my candidate wins, he'll break his promises."
|
| "but even if my candidate wins, he'll break his promises.that's true. they promise anything just so they get elected."
|
| "that's true. they promise anything just so they get elected.and when elected, they go their own way. |
| and when elected, they go their own way.they forget who put them in power. |
| they forget who put them in power.they forget where they came from. |
| they forget where they came from.maybe you should run for office. |
| that election for u.s. senator stunk.what do you mean? |
| what do you mean?there were more votes than voters! |
| there were more votes than voters!but that's impossible."
|
| "but that's impossible.officials said that it's possible."
|
| "officials said that it's possible.did they explain how it's possible?"
|
| "did they explain how it's possible?no. they said there are some things you can't explain."
|
| "no. they said there are some things you can't explain.so are they going to hold another election? |
| so are they going to hold another election?no. that will cost too much money. |
| no. that will cost too much money.so it's better to save money than to have an honest election?"
|
| "so it's better to save money than to have an honest election?well, the democratic party says it was an honest election. |
| well, the democratic party says it was an honest election.of course they say thattheir man won! |
| i see that former president bush is at a conference.yes. he's telling jokes about his eight years as president."
|
| "yes. he's telling jokes about his eight years as president.yes, those eight years were a lot of fun for everyone. |
| yes, those eight years were a lot of fun for everyone.only 4,000 american soldiers were killed overseas. |
| only 4,000 american soldiers were killed overseas.not to mention 40,000 wounded soldiers. |
| not to mention 40,000 wounded soldiers.but bush visited some of them in the hospital once. |
| but bush visited some of them in the hospital once.that's nice that he found the time to make a visit."
|
| "that's nice that he found the time to make a visit.he spoke to them and made them feel better. |
| he spoke to them and made them feel better.did he speak to every family that lost a soldier? |
| did he speak to every family that lost a soldier?no, he didn't have time to do that."
|
| "no, he didn't have time to do that.well, he's got plenty of time now!"
|
| "well, he's got plenty of time now!no, he's too busy writing a book about how hard it was to be president."
|
| "did you get your official sample ballot?","yes, with the voter instructions."
|
| "yes, with the voter instructions.","how are you going to vote?"
|
| "how are you going to vote?","same as ever, by mail. all it costs me is a 42-cent stamp."
|
| "same as ever, by mail. all it costs me is a 42-cent stamp.","i meant, are you going to vote for or against the new taxes?"
|
| "i meant, are you going to vote for or against the new taxes?","against all of them, of course."
|
| "against all of them, of course.","but we need new taxes to pay for highways, schools, and prisons."
|
| "but we need new taxes to pay for highways, schools, and prisons.","we've already voted for new taxes to pay for all that stuff! |
| we've already voted for new taxes to pay for all that stuff!","that's true. where did that money go? |
| that's true. where did that money go?","our legislators spent it on first-class travel all over the world."
|
| "our legislators spent it on first-class travel all over the world.","they are having a good time with our money."
|
| "they are having a good time with our money.","so when are we going to stop giving them more?"
|
| "have you decided how you are going to vote?","do you mean on measures 1, 2, and 3?"
|
| "do you mean on measures 1, 2, and 3?","yes. the ones that will improve our schools, roads, and hospitals."
|
| "yes. the ones that will improve our schools, roads, and hospitals.","you mean the measures that will raise our taxes."
|
| "you mean the measures that will raise our taxes.","but the tv ads say that our taxes will not increase."
|
| "but the tv ads say that our taxes will not increase.","do you believe the tv ads?"
|
| "do you believe the tv ads?","i like the one where the fireman tells us why we should vote yes."
|
| "i like the one where the fireman tells us why we should vote yes.","don't believe him! whatever the tv ads tell you, the opposite is true. |
| don't believe him! whatever the tv ads tell you, the opposite is true.","but the title of measure 1 is "better schools at no cost.""
|
| "but the title of measure 1 is "better schools at no cost."","the title should be "better schools at huge cost.""
|
| "the title should be "better schools at huge cost."","i can't believe that they would lie to us. |
| i can't believe that they would lie to us.","of course they liethat's what politicians do! |
| i have a stomachache.is it something you ate? |
| is it something you ate?maybe. i'm not sure."
|
| "maybe. i'm not sure.what did you have for breakfast? |
| what did you have for breakfast?the usual, cereal with milk and a banana. |
| the usual, cereal with milk and a banana.maybe the milk was bad. |
| maybe the milk was bad.it didn't smell bad."
|
| "it didn't smell bad.maybe the banana was bad. |
| maybe the banana was bad.no, the banana was delicious. |
| no, the banana was delicious.maybe you just need to go to the bathroom. |
| maybe you just need to go to the bathroom.no, that's not the problem."
|
| "no, that's not the problem.maybe it will go away in a little while. |
| what's this stain?","i don't know. |
| i don't know.","it looks like blood."
|
| "it looks like blood.","i think my nose was bleeding."
|
| "i think my nose was bleeding.","you should wet your shirt immediately."
|
| "you should wet your shirt immediately.","why?"
|
| "why?","because that gets the blood out of the shirt."
|
| "because that gets the blood out of the shirt.","what's a little blood? |
| what's a little blood?","your white shirt is ruined."
|
| "your white shirt is ruined.","so, i'll just buy another one. |
| so, i'll just buy another one.","you can wear this one around the house."
|
| "you can wear this one around the house.","next time i'll soak it immediately. |
| my fingers hurt.why do they hurt? |
| why do they hurt?i type too much. |
| i type too much.you should take a break. |
| you should take a break.i need to type to make money. |
| i need to type to make money.but typing is causing you pain. |
| but typing is causing you pain.maybe i should see a doctor. |
| maybe i should see a doctor.doctors are too expensive. |
| doctors are too expensive.he might tell me to rest for a while. |
| he might tell me to rest for a while.he might want to cut you open. |
| he might want to cut you open.he might say i'm okay."
|
| "he might say i'm okay.he might say you have bone cancer. |
| what did the doctor say?he thinks i have too much stress. |
| he thinks i have too much stress.stress causes your stomachaches? |
| stress causes your stomachaches?stress causes different problems with different people. |
| stress causes different problems with different people.so what did he tell you to do? |
| so what did he tell you to do?he said i need to think positive. |
| he said i need to think positive.he didn't give you any medication?"
|
| "he didn't give you any medication?i hate medication. it makes me feel different. |
| i hate medication. it makes me feel different.so how do you think positive? |
| so how do you think positive?i think about nice things. |
| i think about nice things.like what? |
| like what?like a day at the beach, with my toes in the sand. |
| i cut my finger.how did you do that? |
| how did you do that?it's a paper cut."
|
| "it's a paper cut.paper can be dangerous. |
| paper can be dangerous.it hurts, too. |
| it hurts, too.paper cuts can hurt a lot. |
| paper cuts can hurt a lot.where are the band-aids? |
| where are the band-aids?i think they're in the medicine cabinet."
|
| "i think they're in the medicine cabinet.it's on the tip of my finger."
|
| "it's on the tip of my finger.a band-aid might not work. |
| a band-aid might not work.i must not use this finger until the cut heals. |
| i must not use this finger until the cut heals.it might take a day or two to heal. |
| do you smell that?oh, yes. |
| oh, yes.i can't stand cigarette smoke."
|
| "i can't stand cigarette smoke.it smells so bad. |
| it smells so bad.one cigarette stinks up the whole sidewalk. |
| one cigarette stinks up the whole sidewalk.smokers think they are so cool. |
| smokers think they are so cool.they are so weak. |
| they are so weak.a little cigarette controls them. |
| a little cigarette controls them.they look so stupid taking a puff. |
| they look so stupid taking a puff.and then they blow smoke out of their mouth. |
| and then they blow smoke out of their mouth.they think it's cool."
|
| "they think it's cool.cigarettes stink. |
| do you have a cold?yes, i do. |
| yes, i do.how did you get it? |
| how did you get it?my sister had a cold. she gave it to me. |
| my sister had a cold. she gave it to me.have you taken anything for your cold? |
| have you taken anything for your cold?no, i just blow my nose a lot. |
| no, i just blow my nose a lot.your nose is stopped up? |
| your nose is stopped up?yes. i have to breathe through my mouth. |
| yes. i have to breathe through my mouth.have you tried nose drops? |
| have you tried nose drops?no, i don't like nose drops."
|
| "no, i don't like nose drops.they work great. |
| they work great.i don't care. i don't like to put drops in my nose. |
| would you put suntan lotion on my back, please?sure. |
| sure.thank you. |
| thank you.you shouldn't lie in the sun for too long."
|
| "you shouldn't lie in the sun for too long.i want to get a tan. i don't want to look so pale."
|
| "i want to get a tan. i don't want to look so pale.what's wrong with looking pale?"
|
| "what's wrong with looking pale?people think you might be sick. |
| people think you might be sick.who thinks that? |
| who thinks that?i don't know."
|
| "i don't know.it's better to be pale than to have skin cancer."
|
| "it's better to be pale than to have skin cancer.i know that. |
| i know that.so why are you arguing with me? don't lie in the sun too long!"
|
| "i can't quit smoking.of course you can. |
| of course you can.i don't have enough will power."
|
| "i don't have enough will power.of course you do. |
| of course you do.i wish i had never started. |
| i wish i had never started.so does every smoker. |
| so does every smoker.i've tried to quit so many times."
|
| "i've tried to quit so many times.so has everyone else. |
| so has everyone else.nothing seems to work. |
| nothing seems to work.all it takes is will power, and you have it. |
| all it takes is will power, and you have it.then why can't i quit?"
|
| "then why can't i quit?you have to believe in yourself. |
| my back is killing me.what did you do? |
| what did you do?i got out of my car. |
| i got out of my car.that's it?"
|
| "that's it?i injured my back one time just by sneezing. |
| i injured my back one time just by sneezing.you should see a doctor. |
| you should see a doctor.my doctor said i need surgery. |
| my doctor said i need surgery.so? |
| so?so, forget it. |
| so, forget it.you don't have the money?"
|
| "you don't have the money?i have no insurance. |
| i have no insurance.maybe a back rub would help. |
| my brother smokes three packs a day.three packs of what? |
| three packs of what?cigarettes, of course. |
| cigarettes, of course.how can he do that? |
| how can he do that?when he is almost finished with one cigarette, he uses it to light another. |
| when he is almost finished with one cigarette, he uses it to light another.he's a chain smoker."
|
| "he's a chain smoker.he's been a chain smoker for 30 years."
|
| "he's been a chain smoker for 30 years.that's unbelievable. can he still breathe?"
|
| "that's unbelievable. can he still breathe?he can, but the people around him can't."
|
| "he can, but the people around him can't.how can he still be alive? |
| how can he still be alive?his doctor says his heart and lungs are strong and healthy. |
| his doctor says his heart and lungs are strong and healthy.maybe i should start smoking. |
| i hate brushing my teeth.it's such a chore."
|
| "it's such a chore.brush, brush. spit, spit. |
| brush, brush. spit, spit.what did they do in the old days? |
| what did they do in the old days?they brushed with their fingers. |
| they brushed with their fingers.they also ate with their fingers! |
| they also ate with their fingers!why do they call it the good old days? |
| why do they call it the good old days?maybe because they didn't have to brush and floss."
|
| "maybe because they didn't have to brush and floss.who invented flossing? |
| who invented flossing?a dentist, i'm sure."
|
| "a dentist, i'm sure.i hate flossing more than brushing! |
| i hate flossing more than brushing!i can't wait till all my teeth fall out."
|
| "let's stop for a while. i need a break and some water.this trail is hard to climb. |
| this trail is hard to climb.especially on a hot day like this. |
| especially on a hot day like this.i can't believe we haven't seen any animals. |
| i can't believe we haven't seen any animals.thank goodness! i don't want to see any wild animals."
|
| "thank goodness! i don't want to see any wild animals.all we've seen so far is a couple of lizards."
|
| "all we've seen so far is a couple of lizards.we're hiking to lose weight, not to see goats and bears."
|
| "we're hiking to lose weight, not to see goats and bears.i bet i've lost a couple of pounds already."
|
| "i bet i've lost a couple of pounds already.all you've lost is some sweat."
|
| "all you've lost is some sweat.i haven't even lost one pound of fat?"
|
| "i haven't even lost one pound of fat?if you want to lose fat, you've got to do this hike every day."
|
| "if you want to lose fat, you've got to do this hike every day.okay, but let's hike in town. at least there are cats and dogs to see."
|
| "oh no, another pimple on my face.","pimples suck."
|
| "pimples suck.","it seems like i get a new pimple almost every day."
|
| "it seems like i get a new pimple almost every day.","maybe it's something in your diet. |
| maybe it's something in your diet.","no, i eat the same things day after day."
|
| "no, i eat the same things day after day.","then maybe it's in your genes. |
| then maybe it's in your genes.","you might be right."
|
| "you might be right.","do pimples run in your family?"
|
| "do pimples run in your family?","not that i've noticed. |
| not that i've noticed.","well, maybe it's from the pollution in the air. |
| well, maybe it's from the pollution in the air.","whatever the cause, i hate seeing them on my face."
|
| "whatever the cause, i hate seeing them on my face.","well, on the bright side, they're fun to pop. |
| do you believe everything you hear?i don't believe anything i don't see with my own eyes. |
| i don't believe anything i don't see with my own eyes.you can't believe what you hear on tv or radio."
|
| "you can't believe what you hear on tv or radio.you can't believe what you read in the newspapers."
|
| "you can't believe what you read in the newspapers.everyone tells you a different story about the same thing. |
| everyone tells you a different story about the same thing.three different people will give you three different stories. |
| three different people will give you three different stories.and the government will give you a fourth story. |
| and the government will give you a fourth story.yes, like the government says not to worry about the swine flu. |
| yes, like the government says not to worry about the swine flu.but the swine flu just killed 20 people in mexico. |
| but the swine flu just killed 20 people in mexico.the government says we have nothing to worry about. |
| the government says we have nothing to worry about.then why are some schools telling the kids to stay home? |
| then why are some schools telling the kids to stay home?the government says to wash our hands frequently, and we'll all be okay."
|
| "don't pick your nose.i wasn't picking my nose."
|
| "i wasn't picking my nose.what were you doing? |
| what were you doing?i was scratching my nose. |
| i was scratching my nose.i think i know the difference between picking and scratching. |
| i think i know the difference between picking and scratching.okay, mom, maybe i was picking it a little bit. |
| okay, mom, maybe i was picking it a little bit.use a tissue next time. |
| use a tissue next time.i didn't have a tissue."
|
| "i didn't have a tissue.then wait till you find a tissue. |
| then wait till you find a tissue.i couldn't wait. it was an emergency."
|
| "i couldn't wait. it was an emergency.oh, really? maybe you should have called 911. |
| oh, really? maybe you should have called 911.it wasn't that kind of emergency."
|
| "our tv remote is filthy.","yes, it's covered with crud. |
| yes, it's covered with crud.","i'm going to clean it. |
| i'm going to clean it.","don't use water on it! |
| don't use water on it!","i'll use a damp cloth. |
| i'll use a damp cloth.","don't let water get into any of the cracks. |
| don't let water get into any of the cracks.","i'll squeeze the cloth so it's almost dry."
|
| "i'll squeeze the cloth so it's almost dry.","don't rub the numbers off the remote. |
| don't rub the numbers off the remote.","i will rub gently but firmly."
|
| "i will rub gently but firmly.","do it quickly, please, so i can change channels during commercials."
|
| "do it quickly, please, so i can change channels during commercials.","i'll give it back to you in a couple of minutes. |
| i'll give it back to you in a couple of minutes.","maybe we should put it in a plastic bag to keep it clean."
|
| "my ear is killing me.","what's the matter? |
| what's the matter?","i was on a plane."
|
| "i was on a plane.","so?"
|
| "so?","so, every time the plane goes up, my ear starts to hurt."
|
| "so, every time the plane goes up, my ear starts to hurt.","that's no good. |
| that's no good.","sometimes the pain goes away, and sometimes it doesn't. |
| sometimes the pain goes away, and sometimes it doesn't.","have you seen a doctor?"
|
| "have you seen a doctor?","i've been to two doctors. |
| i've been to two doctors.","and they couldn't fix your problem? |
| and they couldn't fix your problem?","they both said i have to live with it."
|
| "they both said i have to live with it.","or you can stay off planes."
|
| "did you see the woman with the new face?","did she get a nice job?"
|
| "did she get a nice job?","she got an "everything" job!"
|
| "she got an "everything" job!","what do you mean?"
|
| "what do you mean?","a team of doctors gave her a whole new face."
|
| "a team of doctors gave her a whole new face.","why did they do that?"
|
| "why did they do that?","a mad dog bit most of her face off."
|
| "a mad dog bit most of her face off.","oh, that's terrible. what does she look like now? |
| oh, that's terrible. what does she look like now?","her face is really fat, but they say the swelling will go down."
|
| "her face is really fat, but they say the swelling will go down.","and then will she look normal again?"
|
| "and then will she look normal again?","i guess so."
|
| "i guess so.","god bless modern medicine."
|
| "there's something wrong with my right hand.what's wrong with it?"
|
| "what's wrong with it?it aches most of the time. |
| it aches most of the time.what do you think it is? |
| what do you think it is?i don't know. i think it's old age. |
| i don't know. i think it's old age.if it's old age, why don't both of your hands hurt? |
| if it's old age, why don't both of your hands hurt?that's a good question. maybe it's not old age. |
| that's a good question. maybe it's not old age.are you right-handed? |
| are you right-handed?yes. all my life. |
| yes. all my life.you're wearing out your right hand. stop using it so much."
|
| "you're wearing out your right hand. stop using it so much.but i do all my writing with my right hand. |
| but i do all my writing with my right hand.start typing instead. that way your left hand will do half the work. |
| |
